02/05/2013 01:50 pm ET Updated May 26, 2015

Guns Guns Guns

Gun control seems anti-American. We love guns. This country is founded on guns. We like to kill things with guns. Not just people, but we also like to hunt. The first people who found America, and I don't mean 'founded' I mean literally just 'found' rolled cannons onto it. And pretty much got what they wanted. So gun activism in this country is nothing personal. It's just good business.

Guns carry with them a certain level of authority. Perhaps that's why people like them. Because you can be ignorant, thoughtless or merely unwashed and still demand respect with a gun. Personally, I always feel respectful of anyone demanding respect instead of earning it. Who has time to wait around and see if someone is worthy of respect? I have a very full day. For example, Gandhi would have been far more respected if he had just rolled into town with a Gatling gun. The British Army would have respected him immediately and withdrawn from the country giving the people of India their freedom. Problem solved.

I think Rush Limbaugh stated it correctly when he implied that the non-violent movement would have made much more progress with guns when he said: "...If John Lewis (civil rights worker) had had a gun, would he have been beat upside the head on the bridge? (on the march to Montgomery)" This shows a deep understanding of the term 'non violent. Think of all the 'marching time' these civil rights peaceniks could have saved by just shooting whoever they had to, get their demands met and still have the afternoon free to do some shopping?

I think it's a mistake to stop there. The women's rights and the suffrage movement would have gone a lot faster if the women had guns and shot their husbands. And let's not deny how much faster the presidential debates would be if each candidate could shoot at the other for two minutes after each question. Moderators of course can be shot at any time.

Wayne La Pierre the Executive Vice President of the N.R.A. currently suggests there should be armed guards in every school in the country. This idea screams safety. And with over 30,000 deaths last year from gun related injuries, this suggestion may seem a little cavalier. But remember the NRA's answer to this: Guns don't kill people, clams kill people, if left out too long and you eat them.

You'll also find the N.R.A. holding firm on refusing Federal background checks at gun shows. Who can argue with this? A background check might disclose if someone is insane or a criminal. This is very embarrassing for the insane criminal who tends to like their privacy before any massacre. Also, if the criminally insane are asked too many questions during a sale, it often distracts them from the voices in their heads who are also asking too many questions at the same time. These voices may find that very rude. And trust me you don't want to go down that road. So it's much more polite to sell them the guns with no check.

So all this gun hysteria makes sense in one area -- sales. And if gun sales shrink in America who do you think is hurt? Probably not Americans because less of them would have guns.

So these declarations from the N.R.A. that;" President Obama is coming for your guns," and warnings of "government gun raids for your guns" is stunningly -- wait for it -- marketing.

Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia wrote for the majority decision in 2008, affirming the Second Amendment. Read that again. All the hype and screaming doesn't negate the fact you have a right to bear it, and if you own it, you keep it.

So when you think you're being lied to about gun rights and gun laws in this country realize that you might be. But most likely by the gun manufacturers and their supporters. Because as long as you're unclear on the law, they can profit from your confusion.

The Constitution grants the citizens the authority to keep that same tool of power that freed them from armed occupation. The gun. But machine guns, semiautomatics and high-capacity magazines are just deadly over kill; blood money that lines the pockets of the gun industry. We deposed a King hundreds of years ago to be free. Let's not use that freedom to make profit king.