After the recent dust-up over Rick Perry's men-only, $15,000 a head fundraiser, it's no secret that the Texas governor holds a special place in his heart for wealthy men. For a limited time only (offer expires November 3rd), Governor Perry is giving his best grassroots campaigners a chance to win exclusive prizes offered up by other rich white men -- because nothing says "grassroots" like Forbes Wealthiest Americans giving away free shooting lessons at a gun range.
Called his "Home Headquarters," all a supporter has to do to enter the contest is publicly identify themselves as a Perry supporter and then strong-arm eleven friends into "Liking" Rick Perry on Facebook. For each eleven friends a supporter signs up, they get an additional entry in the contest.
Sure, you may not have a job, but with prizes like these, you'll forget you ever needed one! Let's take a look at some of the more meatier prizes:
"Thirty Minute Private Business Pitch with Red McCombs"
This is kind of like "Thirty Seconds in the Closet" but with suits on. For your efforts, you'll get to pitch one of Forbes' Wealthiest Americans and feel the harsh sting of rejection! Recently pitched ideas include the Sarah Palin Massage Parlor, Terror-Babies-R-Us and a Border Wall Mart.
"Lt. Governor David Dewhurst: Roping Lesson"
Held in the backyard of the Governor's rental mansion, you are given a lasso and get to take your best aim at Lt. Governor Dewhurst, who will be riding up and down on a mechanical bull. Bonus points if you rope Rick Perry too. Also, no mention of whether a horse is included in the prize, but winners should bring their own boots and spurs. I hear Rick Perry likes those.
"Paul Carrozza: Running Clinic"
Austin legend and business owner Paul Carrozza will take the winner through a series of tactical running drills and best practices, including conditioning, strength training and a real-life coyote encounter. This prize is BYOG (bring your own gun) but a security detail is available upon request.
If none of these prizes pique your interest, don't worry. Rick Perry has the thing for you: Lunch with Karl Rove. You'll finally get that long-awaited opportunity to walk up to him, throw a glass of water in his face, and walk off.
Bon appetit. The bill's on Rove.