The past has a strong hold over many of us and yet at the same time we long to be free of it. Each time we relive the past in our thoughts we keep it alive even though it's extremely painful. It might be a recent communication from an ex that reminds us of the power they once had over us. It might be the knowledge that we behaved badly, we said something to someone we later regretted. It might be that a once dear friend hurt us deeply and we just can't move forward from it.
Here's the thing -- whatever happened is in the past. It can't be changed. It's over. That's the logical bit.
There is absolutely nothing that can be done to change what happened in the past except one thing -- forgiveness. Yes, it's a monumental ask. I know that. However, forgiveness does bring us peace. If we can forgive ourselves for something we did in the past we give ourselves the chance to let go and focus on our lives in the present. It frees us from the hold the past has over us.
Forgiving someone else for a past hurt is harder and more complicated. By forgiving them we're not saying that what they did was okay or that we're accepting their behavior. However, forgiving allows us to concentrate on our present living. Forgiveness frees us from the hold that they have over us. Living with these toxic thoughts poisons our health, our outlook and our future relationships.
If reliving the hurt is painful, then why do we continue to do it? Why do we choose to hang out somewhere so damaging and with thoughts we can't change? Learn instead to focus on what you can change. Take some time for self-reflection, looking inward to what you can change within your own heart.
Here are some ways for you to let go of the past.
- Do something for someone else, let go of your ego. When we focus on another and truly help them, we allow for growth in our own lives. Instead of thinking what's in it for me, let go and focus on kindness and compassion towards another. Random acts of kindness is such a powerful place to begin.
Let me know how you get on.
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