07/09/2009 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here! Week 2 Preview: Finally Out of There...??

The producers of I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here! have made one crucial mistake (yes, that's putting it kindly, I know): everything about the show that's at all interesting is happening off camera. Last week, we were treated to segment after segment in which D-list celebs argued over tiny shampoo bottles and what items can and can't be thrown into a fire. Fascinating. It reminded me of the kinds of meaningless discussions I have with my roommates, except I actually like my roommates, and I'm not completely bored and/or repulsed by everything they say.

But apparently most of the action has happened off camera, especially over the weekend. I'm A Celebrity continues to make headlines mostly because of Heidi and Spencer's will-they-won't-they stay on the show antics, but most of this conflict has been just that: headlines. We barely saw them within the show after the first episode, and we didn't get to watch the only thing worth waiting for: when they were forced to spend a night in the "Lost Chamber," a room full of roaches, rats, bats, eels, spiders, and jungle slime.

By the way, whoever comes up with names like the "Lost Chamber" and the "Trauma Tank," I want your job, cause it's the easiest job in the world and you suck at it.

In any case, apparently Speidi spent the night in the Lost Chamber, at least until Heidi emerged "convulsively throwing up" and went to the hospital. This entire story baffles me. What made her throw up, the idea of being in a room with disgusting animals and insects, or the fact that all she had to eat was rice, beans, and water? 'Cause neither one of those seems like enough to cause a gastric ulcer, even though that's her diagnosis. I smell preexisting condition! Now Heidi is threatening to sue NBC, but unless she actually got bit or poisoned by one of those animals (and NBC can't be stupid enough to let that happen, can they?), does she really have a case, or will this soon be uncovered as the ridiculous hoax we all know it is?

My favorite part of this mess is TMZ"s sensationalizing of the story, claiming that NBC may have convinced her to stay on the show rather than visit a hospital and that her medical condition was "designed as punishment" for leaving the show. Come on, TMZ; Heidi and Spencer are the bad guys! Not NBC! Then again, watching this show does seem much worse than spending a day and night in the Lost Chamber, so maybe NBC should be investigated for torture.

In any case, I can't wait to watch tonight and see how much they show us. I wouldn't be surprised if they try to stay on the show, for the 3rd? 4th? 5th? time? And I'll be even less surprised if NBC allows them to stay... sadly, even something like this could boost the network's current reputation.