Because it's (almost) always better after 50, I'm done feeling guilty ... how about you? Here's what I'm not feeling guilty about any more...
- Boycotting restaurants that have calorie counts on the menu.
- Losing my new lipstick within 24 hours after purchase.
- Buying lemons when I already have 12 in the refrigerator.
- Hoping my downhill skis are stolen when I go in for lunch.
- Staying in my pajamas all day.
- Not taking a shower until 4 p.m. ... even when I've exercised at 8 a.m.
- Forgetting my recycle bags about 50 percent of the time I go to the market.
- Not always putting the shopping cart back in the corral (I'm late; It's raining; My knee hurts; I pray no one sees me. )
- Not ever wanting to drive 45 minutes in traffic and pay $30 for parking after driving in order to eat at an overpriced restaurant downtown.
- Sneaking my own candy into the movies.
- That my favorite date night is at home with my husband on the couch watching a Netflix movie.
- Telling the waiter, "Yes, I'd like the bread basket, please!"
- Making everyone in my airplane aisle get up when I have to pee every half hour (honestly, I tried to get an aisle seat.)
- Napping.
- Watching TV.
- Not reading the book club book (I was watching TV).
- Forgetting my password to FB, Twitter, Uber, amazon...everything
- Putting on makeup before going to the gym.
- Not always recycling.
- Chocolate three times a day.
- Getting a manicure, pedicure, facial, botox, hair color, blow out (but not all in one day, of course.)
- Taking a pill before bed so I sleep.
- Not cooking dinner.
- Being a slob.
- Hating winter, and this one in particular.
- Having a cocktail with dinner (or for dinner.)
- Looking tired when I AM tired.
- Not wanting to drive at night.
- Needing my readers to see the directions on the face cream
- Needing to lose 10 pounds.
- Taking a few days off from exercise.
- Not going to that party I really should go to but REALLY don't want to go to.
- Acting like Larry David.
- Not calling my mother when I get home (but only because she is dead.)
- Losing 13 hours by bingeing on the latest Netflix or Amazon Prime TV show.
- Drinking 5 cups of coffee before noon.
- Retail therapy.
- Farting.
- Snoring.
- Paying $20 for a seat and popcorn at the luxury movie theatre.
- Making lists that include completed tasks, just for the pure enjoyment of crossing stuff off.
- Vacationing without the kids.
- Forgetting my kids' phone numbers (thank you, speed dial...)
- Being happy I no longer have to get home for the dog.
- Being happy I no longer have to get home to carpool the kids.
- Hating kale.
- Being disorganized.
- Loving peanut butter ice cream.
- Having so much open on my computer that everyone who looks at it comments on it.
- Not being able to operate the TV by myself.
If you liked this...you will love "
" by Felice Shapiro and me! Buy it
....and for our Boston area readers, you can also find our book at
, Wellesley, MA.
Earlier on Huff/Post50:
