12/28/2010 04:15 pm ET Updated May 25, 2011

Ireland to Recover Properties From Real Estate Developers' Wives With Team of Crack Italian Gigolos

Ireland's state-owned "bad bank" NAMA has announced an unconventional plan to recover assets from real estate developer's wives using a team of crack gigolos.

At a hastily arranged press conference this evening NAMA chairman Mr Frank Daly said, "We have hired over one hundred mostly Italian guys to seduce these ladies."

Mr Daly was speaking in the wake of revelations on Irish television's Prime Time program that many Irish developers transferred property and other assets to their wives to avoid their debt obligations. This was done with intent of preventing the Irish taxpayer from recovering the assets, which include mansions, land and apartment complexes. The assets may now be legally out of reach.

"Don't worry, we'll get a lot of these assets back. Most of these developers are wrinkly old geezers," continued Mr Daly, "What's more, now they are broke. As soon as Giovanni comes a-calling, Mrs Developer is out of there. I guarantee it."

Irish Finance Minister Brian Lenihan said: "NAMA's gigolos are the best in the world. Within a 12 month period they will seduce, romance, marry and then divorce these developer's wives, thereby recovering at least half the assets for the Irish taxpayer."

Sources in the Department of Finance said that they have contracted with the gigolos to pay them a percentage of the assets ultimately recovered.

For a more serious take on the issue, check out