THE BLOG
11/12/2014 05:56 pm ET Updated Jan 12, 2015

5 Must Dos to Strengthen Your Sense of Self and Increase Your Confidence

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There are days when you feel confident and happy, and there are others when you feel as if something is missing. Those other days are the days when that "something" causes you to feel less than and uncertain of yourself. During those days you also find yourself questioning your abilities: Do you have the courage to talk to your boss about the promotion you deserve? Do you have the finances to pay the bills? Do you have the strength to let go of that relationship that no longer suits you?

Those days can question your confidence, happiness and everything you thought you knew about yourself because you give them that power. You allow outside sources to take over what you already know internally. Strengthening your sense of self is going to be key to getting you through those days successfully. Here I will give you the five must's to help strengthen your sense of self and increase your confidence.

1. You must believe in yourself

Believing in yourself is the number one necessity to maintain confidence and an unwavering sense of self. Trusting yourself regardless of what others say, believe, or expect of you and from you is an absolute must. When you begin to question yourself, you bring doubt into your life and allow insecurities to start showing up. Support yourself though all of your choices and decisions, trusting that you have your best interests at heart and know what is best for you.

2. You must live and speak your truth

When you allow yourself to listen to others as they tell you who you are and what you should be doing you give your power away to them in that moment. You allow their voice to become more powerful than yours. Staying connected with what you believe, how you feel, your values, morals and integrity, your point of view, and how you want to live your life is going to help you gain confidence and give you the courage that you need to live for you and not anyone else. This will also help you match the person who you show to others with the person who you are inside leaving no room for discrepancies, which will also help your strengthen your sense of trust and discernment so you are able to appropriately take advice.

3. You must see yourself in a positive light

Seeing yourself in a positive light requires an awareness and an alignment of your thoughts and actions, and it also requires discipline and consistency so you are able to shift any self negativity into positivity. You must consciously choose to change any thoughts or feelings that do not benefit you, speaking positively to yourself about yourself always. It takes daily work, but the results are tremendous, especially when it comes to maintaining a healthy sense of self. You must also give yourself credit for all of your accomplishments no matter how small. Compliment yourself and give yourself credit for all that you are and that you do daily.

4. You must be compassionate with yourself

Insecurities mainly arise from guilt. Guilt always taints your sense of self and has the power to remove any joy from your life. You must be compassionate with yourself and forgive yourself to overcome guilt. You must also take it easy and meet your own needs. Treat yourself as you would a baby or someone who needs extra care. Be patient, understanding, loving, nurturing, complimentary, supportive, empathic, and everything else that you need with yourself.

5. You must keep moving forward

Just like you must forgive yourself, you must also forgive others and let go of the past. Let go of anything that is keeping you from being focused on the present. Move forward, knowing you are perfect the way you are and there is no reason to stay stuck in the past. Move beyond all forms of pain from hurt to regret, and allow yourself to connect with who you are now and where you are now. Allow yourself to see how far you have come and how much you have grown by getting out of your own way.