04/07/2015 06:44 pm ET Updated Dec 06, 2017

The One Thing Most People Are Scared Of (It's Not What You Think)


Oprah says, after years of doing the Oprah show, that every guest, from the First Lady to the cleaning lady, wanted to know they mattered. I have found, after thousands of hours of coaching, that almost everyone is afraid of success. Of reaching their potential, of actually living out their dream.

I see this fear manifest itself in all kinds of ways.

Do any of these resonate?

1. Procrastination
We stay busy, busy, busy, but we don't find the time to work on the projects that are meaningful to us. Busy is just a self-created distraction. If we actually got busy with the work that mattered, we would have to own our idea, and for most of us that's a scary prospect.

2. Perfectionism
I see this all the time. Well, the idea isn't quite right yet. It needs a bit more work until I can put it out there. I don't have the right space, the right title, enough experience, the right marketing, actually I don't know anything about marketing, so I can't possibly launch it yet. Maybe, I should buy a marketing course??

Consistent imperfect action, leads to show stopping results. Every. Single. Time.

3. I'm not good enough
Replace good with any adjective at all. I'm not confident enough. I'm not smart enough. I'm not motivated enough etc. This fear is the most paralyzing of all because it's not just about what we do, but about who we think we are. (Think is the key word here).

4. What do I actually want?
I amaze myself with this one all the time. Most people do things because they are supposed to be done a certain way. In other words, we make decisions based on other people's expectations. How often do we stop to ask ourselves, what do I want to create? Case in point: I am currently planning the second Soul Sessions: The Retreat and I consciously changed the day to a weekday because I don't want to work at the weekend. I also have been worrying about the location because it should be in a professional location, right? Wrong. I want it to be in a welcoming, homely location, which, now, just so happens to be my house, and I'm thrilled. It's amazing how little we stop and ask ourselves this question, and yet, it's the most important question to ask.

We are scared of reaching our dreams because it means standing firmly on our own two feet and believing wholeheartedly in our vision.

That isn't easy.

There are so many people who are quick to tell us their opinion and we allow ourselves to deviate, to change our minds, to make our dream smaller.

Today, ask yourself, what do I want to do, and challenge yourself to do it.

With Love,
Sarah xxx