01/15/2012 11:52 pm ET Updated Oct 11, 2012

2012 Golden Globes: What's With All These Stars' Smushed Boobs? (PHOTOS)

Nude hues, mermaid trains and sparkling fabrics were among the more gorgeous trends I saw on the 2012 Golden Globes red carpet.

But call me old-fashioned, there is one evening gown look I can't wrap my head around: smushed boobs.

While everyone was busy staring at Madonna's ripped biceps, I couldn't get past the way her chest looked like two flat pancakes. And yes, Jessica Alba was stunning in Gucci, but that neckline looked a size too small. Perhaps stylists believe that a tighter bust will make women appear as though they are a cup size larger, but all I see is a wardrobe malfunction waiting to happen.

Below, a roundup of the best and worst strapless dresses from the 2012 Golden Globes. See which stars looked stunning and which ones just looked smushed: