02/17/2015 08:14 am ET Updated Apr 19, 2015

Crawl Into Heaven: Create a Nourishing Bed

I adore our new bed. Every night is like I'm crawling into heaven.

For starters, getting a new mattress was a significant upgrade after our big "musical chairs" makeover last summer. I still can't believe how good it feels to be so completely supported and nourished in this way.

If I've learned anything at all after years and years of clearing, letting go is not possible unless we feel safe. And one of the simplest ways I know to create a nesting place where we can be cozy, rest deeply, and feel most safe begins with the one thing we all need: a good bed.

To know if your bed is working for you, read these statements out loud and notice how your body responds (the eye rolls, the twinges, the pangs):

  • I love getting into bed at night.
  • I love the way my mattress supports every muscle in my body.
  • I love the feeling of my sheets on my skin.
  • My pillow supports my head, neck, and shoulders perfectly.
  • I feel so held and safe in my bed.
  • I wake up feeling refreshed in the morning.

If each statement elicits a gushing yes! -- congratulations. You got the bed thing down. Enjoy it.

If your reaction is one of smarting eye rolls, desirous twinges, or poor-me pangs, congratulations. You have a big treat waiting for you when you follow the steps below for changing up your bed experience.

Here's what you can do to create a nourishing bed:

  1. Get the best mattress you can afford. For all the hours we spend in bed, getting a good mattress is key.
  2. Do your research -- both online and in the stores. Ask your friends what mattresses they like. Check out Consumer Reports for highly-rated mattresses. Read reviews online. Whittle down your choices to two or three options.
  3. Hop on a few beds. Nothing beats test-driving the real thing, even if you end up buying online or from another vendor. Don't over think. Go for how the bed makes you feel. If you share your bed with a partner, be sure both of you are on board, so to speak.
  4. Comparison shop. You may be pleasantly surprised by the quality of mattresses that are available now online and at warehouse stores. We got ours from on sale, of all places, with a 20-year warranty.
  5. Invest in a good pillow. Identify if you are predominately a back, side, or belly sleeper, and take the time to research and try a few.
  6. Get the best sheets you can afford. The higher the thread count the more heavenly they will feel. We bought two sets of 600-thread count sateen sheets at Costco for a fraction of what they cost online or in department stores. They feel like butter.
  7. Top off with comfort. Choose covers that match your climate, sleeping habits, and taste. My husband and I favor a seasonal rotation of light cotton quilts in the summer and soft flannel duvet comforters in the winter that don't weigh us down. The key is to feel enveloped and cushy, not over layered and strangled.
  8. Make adjustments. Keep adjusting your bed and bedding until you have found the perfect balance of comfort and support. If you suffer from night sweats as I have, for example -- tearing off the blankets one second and yanking them back on the next -- there is an amazing solution for that: a lightweight, all-natural comforter made of "smart silk." This miracle alternative to the traditional down comforter regulates your temperature: it knows when to wick and when to warm. Worth every penny.

TO HELP YOU along in your quest to create the most nourishing bed, complete and reflect on the following statements:

  • The thought of crawling into a heavenly bed makes me feel...
  • What works about my bed...
  • What doesn't work about my bed...
  • One easy thing I can do today to change it up...
  • One thing I can research this week to make my bed work even better for me (us)...

Tell me, is there any reason not to feel like you're in heaven when you crawl into bed every night? What helps you feel nourished and cozy?

P.S. If you found this message helpful, please forward it to someone else (or share, like, tweet, pin... ) and let's build the clearing energy together that will help to lighten all of our loads!