Did you recently decide to start dating someone new? Move to a new city? Change your career or job? Whatever it is, you decided to make a change and everyone seems to have an opinion.
Your dad, best friend, that one client or customer you always chat with.
Despite not asking, people suddenly seem to feel they have a right to give you their opinion. They scowl or scoff, share their own personal experience, try to cloud your judgement with their preferences and beliefs... generally, dump on you in one form or another. It may not be intentional, but their biased opinion creates stress whether they mean for it to or not.
So what are you supposed to do?
Not tell anyone anything? Become secretive and withdrawn? Not at all! I have a better solution...
How to safe-guard yourself while making changes:
Create an energy bubble.
We're all highly energetic beings whether we're aware of it or not. That's why when someone responds negatively, we're affected by it. Even if they're attempting to be positive, that negative energy is still there and we can still feel that something's not right.
Before you go into a conversation with anyone, take a moment to check in with yourself. How are you feeling about this decision? Good? Energized? Excited? Awesome. Close your eyes and sit with those feelings. Really experience the positive energy and emotions. Now, imagine that all this energy is contained within a bubble around you. See yourself sitting there, smiling of course, with bright light swirling all around you. Contained, within this bubble.
When you receive a response from someone, continue to feel those positive feelings and imagine that their negative energy is bouncing right off that bubble you've created for yourself. It doesn't have to impact you if you choose not to let it.
Detach yourself from their response.
Remember, their opinion is biased and is based completely on their personal preferences, background, experiences and beliefs. So long as you keep this top of mind, it's impossible to take anyone's word as gospel. The way they react is a reflection of them, not you.
Just because your parents are unsupportive, it doesn't mean it's wrong for you. Only you can know what's truly the next best move. Remember that, while they may love you, unless they support you 100% in doing what's best for you, they're more concerned about their needs, insecurities or fear of the unknown then they are about what's best for you.
Keep what works for you, discard the rest.
Always filter. Sometimes people manage to squeeze out some valuable information from an unbiased place, or have some advice that is relevant and useful. Listen to their thoughts, discard what doesn't work for you.
Maybe your mom brought up a good point about that career change and you want to do a little research. Awesome. But her opinion of why she thinks you're better off in your current job, irrelevant. How can she know? She can't because she's not you.
Keep your intuition locked in when speaking with other people. You'll know if a piece of information has value to you or not. Does it get you curious? Hit on an unknown you need more information around? Or does it just make you feel stressed out and unsupported?
Remember, you're the only one who matters.
You are the only person who knows what's best for you. It's impossible for anyone else to. No matter how much you share with them, they are not connected to your deepest desires, intuition or hopes and dreams. Always, always listen to yourself and what you want first.
Take Action Now!
Have you been in a situation like this before? How did other people's decisions effect or influence what you decided to do, despite what you wanted? Leave a comment below sharing some of your own insights on this topic!
Stephenie Zamora is the founder of www.stepheniezamora.com, a full-service, life-purpose development, design and branding boutique. Through her Mastery program, she merges the worlds of personal development and branding to help men and women build passion-based lives and businesses they love. Click here to access her free Foundations for Unshakable Joy™ video training series and learn the unexpected trick to transforming your life with one single question!
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