10/01/2008 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

Tropical Storm Gustav Agrees to Fill in for President Bush

In what is being called a brilliant move by most political pundits and Al Roker, Tropical Storm Gustav has promised to fill in for both President Bush and Vice President Cheney at the Republican National Convention in Minneapolis this Monday.

"We had a last minute choice to make. Bush or Gustav," said Republican National Committee Chairman Robert M. "Mike" Duncan. "We went with the less damaging to the campaign."

"There were many at the RNC who were concerned about the President and Vice President making an appearance, seeing it as another opportunity for the Democrats to stick on the third Bush term label." said Duncan, "But Gustav not only keeps Bush away from the convention, but now the homeless in New Orleans can feel sorry for us."

At first, it was actually thought a Gustav appearance would be at best, a long shot.

"What with Homeland Security, getting a tropical storm credentialed at the last minute alone would have been overwhelming." said Duncan, "And with evangelical prayers failing to bring rain down on Obama's stadium speech, we thought we might be stuck with Bush and Cheney. That's when someone thought to call Rove. Next thing we new, Gustav was on the line."

"I'm not a Democrat or Republican," said TP Gustav. "But I know a good public relations opportunity when I see it. To tell you the truth, I'm more of a Libertarian and right now I'm leaning towards Bob Barr. I would have gone to his convention but at the time, I wasn't even a glimmer in the eye of a low pressure system."

Award-winning TV writer, Steve Young, is author of Great Failures of the Extremely Successful and blogs at the appropriately named