Now Controlling Senate, Republicans Propose Bipartisan Program

Now Controlling Senate, Republicans Propose Bipartisan Program
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As their party now holds an insurmountable 41 to 59 majority in the Senate, Republican leaders yesterday presented their legislative agenda for 2010, and asked Democrats to join them in crafting non-partisan solutions to nation's problems.

Jobs, jobs, jobs is the Republicans highest priority. Their Shelby stimulus plan would create 125 jobs by funding $40 billion of earmarks for two projects in Alabama. In a conciliatory gesture, Sen. Shelby (AL) would also release his blanket hold on Obama nominees putting at least 70 more people to work.

The second part of the Republican jobs plan is tax cuts for America's wealthiest. "We must change the incentives," Republican Leader Mitch McConnell argued. "With taxes so high, most of the unemployed see no reason to get a job. Moreover, as we have proven before, tax cuts by themselves create jobs." McConnell pointed to the Bush tax cuts that resulted in over 200 new jobs in catering bat mitzvahs for daughters of hedge fund operators.

Sen. DeMint (SC) added that that enacting Republican social initiatives-- the prohibition of gay marriage, abortion, and logical thought--would create millions of jobs

In addition to the jobs plan the Republican legislative program comprises:

Deficit reduction-Republicans would both finance their tax cuts and significantly reduce the deficit by eliminating government waste, fraud, and inefficiency. Asked for specifics, Sen. John Kyl (AZ) proposed reducing expenditures in The Department of Waste by $40 billion, cutting the Department of Fraud by 37%, and a placing job freeze on the Department of Inefficiency.

Sen. DeMint added that enacting Republican social initiatives --the prohibition of gay marriage, abortion, and logical thought--would reduce the deficit.

• Education-Tax cuts for America's wealthiest are the cornerstone of the Republicans education program. "We must change the incentives. Why bother to get educated if you have to pay taxes?" Sen. Cochran (MS) asked.

To improve education, Sen. Cochran also proposed the establishment of The Bible Corp to teach Young Earth, Abstinence Only Sex Education, and Creationism in public schools. "We now have scientific evidence that the earth was created three thousand year after the Chinese started brewing alcoholic beverages," he revealed. "Students need to be exposed to these facts. And once exposed to abstinence only teachings, teenage males quickly lose interest in sex."

Sen. DeMint added that enacting Republican social initiatives --the prohibition of gay marriage, abortion, and logical thought--would improve education.

• Bank Regulation-To prevent another bank meltdown and bailout, the Republican plan would prohibit banks from lending to poor people. "Democrats started this whole mess by allowing banks to make mortgage loans to poor people. We won't let this happen again, " Sen. Cornyn (TX) promised.

In addition, the Republican plan would limit the bank risk by lowering taxes paid by bank executives. "It is Economics 101," Sen. Cornyn explained. "The higher the tax, the more risk they have to take to keep the same after-tax income. High taxes, not the free market, are to blame for the banking crisis."

Sen. DeMint added that enacting Republican social initiatives --the prohibition of gay marriage, abortion, and logical thought--would stabilize banks.

• Health Care
: "Everyone agrees America has the best health care system except for its uninsured," Sen. Chambliss (GA) maintained. "So let the uninsured die off and not trouble the rest of us."

According to Chambliss, the Republican health plan will also help close the deficit, improve education and solve the unemployment problem. "If all the uninsured died tomorrow, Medicare and Social Security would become solvent; our schools would rid themselves of their worst students; and unemployment rates would plummet."

Chambliss also favors tax cuts for physicians making over $300,000 a year. "Let's look to the supply side," he asserted. "The way to decrease health care costs is to increase supply. With lower tax rates, overpaid physicians will have incentives to work more hours."

Sen. DeMint added that enacting Republican social initiatives --the prohibition of gay marriage, abortion, and logical thought--would improve health care.

Democrats were undecided as to whether to embrace all, or only parts, of the Republican plan. "The math is brutal," Senate Majority Leader Reid (NV) admitted. "They have 41 votes so we have to go along with most of it. If we don't, they will label us radical abolitionists in the 2012 election."

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