08/08/2014 03:26 pm ET Updated Oct 08, 2014

Being a Mother: The Expectation and the Reality


Expected: Natural delivery with no intervention.
Reality: 20 hours of non-progressive labor that required a C-section.

Expected: Being older and experienced, parenting would be a snap.
Reality: Eight hours of nursing a day is more exhausting than being President of the United States.

Expected: Would calm down once he outgrew the risk of SIDS.
Reality: Went on to worrying about teething, toilet training, teenage turmoil, etc.

Expected: Nursing would cause those extra pounds to drop off.
Reality: My waist never returned.

Expected: My son would continue to run to me with a scraped knee or bruised ego.
Reality: In the teenage years, an information blackout was introduced.

Expected: His generation would inherit a better world than we did.
Reality: He belongs to "the 9/11 Generation."

Expected: I would hear him say, "I have the coolest mom."
Reality: Almost nothing is easier than embarrassing him.

Expected: Being a mother would be important and joyous.
Reality: It's way more than that.

Expected: Once he was a young adult, I would be at leisure.
Reality: I became a mosaic artist, which is ridiculously labor intensive.

Expected: You would all visit my website.
Reality: Maybe you will make that a reality by visiting