When people reminded me that time heals all wounds and this too shall pass after my break up, I wanted to kick them in the teeth.
If you're experiencing the I-can't-get-out-of-bed heartache or the I'll-never-feel-like-me-again heart break, you know what I'm talking about.
At this point, if it's truly over, you're going to need to take action. There comes a day when we must put away the ice cream, wash our tear-stained faces and realize it's time to come to terms with the hard, cold fact that it's over and life must go on sans our pajamas.
Your therapist can help you understand, but until then, I'm going to give you four ways to move on.
1. Out of sight, out of mind. Your mind needs a new view.
Let their face start to fade from your memory and delete your social media connections. Torturing yourself as you cruise their Facebook page, Twitter feed and Instagram accounts is like spotting broken glass in your path and removing your shoes. Who tortures themselves on purpose? Heartbroken people do. Stop it now.
2. New music, new memories.
Playing the music you experienced together continues to reinforce the fact that you're alone now. Find some new music, make yourself an upbeat playlist that holds absolutely no connection to your ex, and start to let your mind clear.
3. You might not be able to move, but you can move around.
Home is where the heart is... and a hell of a lot of memories. Change things up. Move the furniture around, buy some new sheets, and for God's sake, throw away or return any forgotten items such as toiletries and clothing. No one will know that you're still sniffing their things, but your heart will and it only prolongs the pain -- I promise.
4. Frequent your possible future, not your past.
Find a new grocery store, coffee shop, gym and bar. Running into your ex by accident isn't fate stepping in, it's calculated desperation that leads back to pajamas and ice cream. (I know this one.)
Getting over an ex is a complicated, drawn-out process that can't possibly consist of a quick to do list, but taking a few actions to protect yourself from self induced pain is mandatory.
It is said that breaks in the body always heal stronger than they were prior to the injury. Your heart is a huge muscle that will love again, I promise.