A few days ago I had an interesting conversation with my children. My daughter told me about someone who was being bullied at school and was being called all sorts of things. She was being called bisexual, lesbian and transgender. My daughter said the poor girl was devastated and to that I responded with the typical lecture on how bullying was wrong and she should feel compassion towards that girl and be her friend. To that my 17-year-old turned around and said,
"But mom, you're not getting the point why should she be singled out if she isn't like me, she is still human."
And I continued to be in the mother mode and said that yes people like to be mean to others that they feel are different.
Again my daughter was frustrated with me and said,
"Mom you're not listening to me, she isn't different she is like every other human on earth who feels sad when made fun of, who laughs with her friends and who has a weird family like us. You are the one who has always taught us not to judge anyone, how can you call her different. You always have friends who people judge and treat differently, how you can call her different!"
At that point I understood her frustration. She had looked up to me as a person who loved all humans and now I was being judgmental in her eyes. She couldn't stand to see her mother call someone "different," because since she was little I had taught her that beauty lies in each one of us being special and thats what makes the world beautiful
Then my son turned to me and said, "So if one of your children got up and said that they were gay, bisexual or wanted a gender change how would you feel?"
I had always been pride and arrogant about not being judgmental... who was I to judge? But his question caught me off guard. Yes, I had thought about it in the past. But at that moment I had to face the inner reality of discrimination that is hidden in the deepest darkest corners of my heart. What would I do?
With a deep sigh and a big smile I turned to them and said, "Of course I would accept any lifestyle you choose; would it be an adjustment for me? Yes, it would. But no matter what path you follow I will always love and support you guys."
It was great to see the cloud of doubt rise from my children's faces. To them I was their hero, the champion for change and acceptance, and once again I was able to reign as the queen of their hearts.
And it made me proud of the people that my children were growing up to be.
In the wise words of Maclemore and Ryan Lewis:
"We've become so numb to what we're sayin'
Our culture founded from oppression
Yeah, we don't have acceptance for 'em
Call each other faggots behind the keys of a message board
A word routed in hate, yet our genre still ignores it
Gay is synonymous with the lesser
It's the same hate that's caused wars from religion
Gender to skin color the complexion of your pigment
The same fight that lead people to walk-outs and sit-ins,
It's human rights for everybody
There is no difference
Live on! And be yourself!
When I was in church, they taught me something else
If you preach hate at the service Those words aren't anointed
And that Holy Water, that you soak in is then poisoned
When everyone else Is more comfortable remaining voiceless
Rather than fighting for humans, that have had their rights stolen
I might not be the same But that's not important
No freedom 'til we're equal
Damn right I support it"