TNT execs revealed that they only own the rights to second half of the film The Shawshank Redemption, and has never actually broadcast the first "hour or so."
"Most Shawshank fans claim they can watch it from any point and it doesn't affect the viewing experience," explained one TNT exec. "So why should we waste money buying the rights to the whole thing? Andy goes to jail, Andy gets raped, blah blah. Did you really need to see that? No. Now watch him become besties with Morgan Freeman and go to Mexico."
This startling revelation reveals why even the most avid fans of the film have trouble recalling the beginning.
"I swear I've seen that flick like a hundred times," said one oblivious fan, who admitted he thought the beginning was when Brooks dies. "It's amazing that a Hollywood movie could only be an hour long."
TNT announced Shawshank would not be the only movie to be cut in half. Others include My Cousin Vinny, Ferris Bueller's Day Off and any John Cusack film from 1984-1989. They also admitted they never run Remember the Titans in its entirety, just the scene where racial harmony is achieved through a Motown song.
-Dan Abramson, thehollywoodham.com
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