05/30/2013 03:40 pm ET Updated Feb 02, 2016


Honestly, there are times when I just don't understand the game of drag. I was originally going to use the word "world," but the more I thought about it, "game" seemed much more suited to what drag really is. Being involved in drag in any capacity is like playing a real-life game of Dragopoly.

Everyone involved in drag is trying to gather as much "property," "hotels" and cash as he can. In Dragopoly, "property" means regular bookings. Once properties are obtained, it's time to start building hotels. In Dragopoly, "hotels" means a fan base. Though it is possible to build your hotels before having any property, when this happens, property comes quicker and easier.

In Dragopoly, the one thing you don't want to do is draw the "go straight to jail"/"do not collect $200" card. In this game, jail is harder to get out of than just skipping the next turn. While in jail in Dragopoly, you can't purchase property or build hotels. With out property or hotels, you cannot get out of jail. To get out of jail in Dragopoly, you need a bar or a show director to decide to bail you out. In Dragopoly, "bailout" means multiple bookings. Unfortunately, that could take several turns around the board.

In Dragopoly, every player hopes to draw the Chance card "booking." This card allows players to purchase any property they like and build hotels without any cash. The "booking" card is equivalent to many rolls of the dice. When someone draws the "booking" card, they can name bookings at the venue of their choosing. If you draw the "booking" card, you have won Dragopoly.

Along with the Chance "booking" card, there is the Community Chest card "fundraiser." This card can be a double-edged sword. When this card is drawn, it can increase your ability to purchase property and build hotels. However, it can also decrease your ability to do this. On rare occasions, you will continuously draw the "fundraiser" card, leading to never acquiring property and hotels, which keeps you behind the other players of the game.

Knowing not only the rules but the odds of Dragopoly is extremely important before playing. However, keep in mind that in Dragopoly, the rules can change at a moment's notice and land you in jail until the end of the game. Dragopoly can be a ton of fun, but it can be just as frustrating, depending on how you roll the dice. Good luck, and let the dice roll where they may!

The post originally appeared on Diary of a Drag Queen's Husband.