07/18/2009 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

Breaking News: Budget Crisis Solved

In case any of you have missed the memo, we are facing some challenging economic times. It wasn't too long ago that a million dollars seemed like a great deal of money but the times they are a changing. If I had a million dollars today, I would probably use it to pay off one of my credit cards. Sadly we have reached a point were we don't seem to flinch talking about a billion dollars. Actually, we seem to be getting comfortable tossing around one hundred billion dollars. And let's not ignore the fact that we now are mentioning trillion dollar deficits.

As our nation, states, cities and towns struggle to provide services and pay bills, we must look for creative ways to generate revenue. For many years we have been digging a hole for ourselves and it has gotten pretty deep. That being the case, I think it is time for some drastic measures to get us back on the right track. We often spend so much time analyzing challenges that we sometimes miss opportunities and solutions that are right before our eyes. I am proposing a relatively simple measure that should generate enough cash to eliminate many of our country's challenges.

At first, I thought the answer was to tax politician's egos. It's no secret that many politicians have huge egos. It's almost a prerequisite for the job. If we could figure a way to collect even a small tax every time these egos reared their ugly heads, our shortage of revenue would be a thing of the past. I have yet to figure how to directly tax egos so we have to attack it from another direction.

My economic recovery/budget fix plan does involve a new tax. I am proposing a tax on the self proclaimed political pundits. Skewed and twisted "news" reporting has taken over our airwaves. Shows that are commentaries and opinion laced are being sold as the news and thereby manipulating our citizens. Most of what is spewed from these bully pulpits by these verbose and often narrow minded people is nothing more than propaganda promoting their positions. Just like Robert Johnson sold his soul to the devil to be a bluesman, the pundits will do or say anything to further their causes. Reality and the truth often take back seats to a personal agenda. Saying it loud and often doesn't make it true or right.

Under my new tax plan the networks would have to declare a show news or opinion. The political commentaries and opinion shows would be taxed by the word. The pundits would also be taxed anytime they spoke in public. Their egos would not allow them to keep their mouths shut even when they had nothing to say. We witness that every day. That fact alone would mean the revenues would be off the chart and our financial woes would be dramatically diminished. If by chance they somehow were able to carefully limit their outbursts we still would win. It would make it much easier to find the truth among the smoke and mirrors.

I know there are probably people getting all fired up about the whole free speech thing right now. I want to quickly remind those defending these people that as we all know, freedom and free speech are not free. Speaking the truth should be free. Twisted truths and outright lies should be taxed.

As with all taxes there is a loophole. The modus operandi of most of these pseudo news people is to tear down, destroy and discredit in every way possible. Their tax liability would be forgiven if they spent just 20% of their time creating, proposing solutions, and inspiring others to positive action. The bottom line is a challenge to these self proclaimed super-pundits- Keith, Bill, Rush, Rachael, Sean, and the rest. How about spending some time creating instead of only destroying? I ask you to raise your right hand and repeat after me:

I (state your name), hereby pledge to make my momma proud by using my super-pundit powers for only good and never for evil.

Now that wasn't that bad, was it?