06/05/2010 05:12 am ET Updated May 25, 2011

Chucking Chuck Grassley

This Old Fossil
A Poem by John Shumaker

Ah Chuck "the man" Grassley,
there's just not enough superlative invective ya can say about this old fossil.
Well golly gee everything sure is swell Chuck Senator for Life Grassley puffs up with pride at his SWELL accomplishments
heck all the pigs down at the sty in hog wallow Swaledale won't even tolerate his stench
they won't even let the Grasster roll around in the manure pile and muck with them
even they have SOME couth
Golly Gee everything REALLY will be Swell
when we get a "two-fer" in this upcoming election in November
cuz unlike Republican elephants
Iowa voters never do forget
the two-fer we're gonna get is those two old fosdicks Grassley and Brandstadt retired once and FOR ALL
Fully and Completely
out to the farm where they can slop all the crap they ever dreamed up to their hearts content
far and FOREVER Away from Good Iowans who have put up with their crap for low these oh too many years
Iowans UNITE
and take comfort
Roxanne is on her way to a NEW DAY for Iowa!
and we can finally Chuck the man Grassley forever,
the Grassley time count is still on
as his waning sand pebbles are swiftly falling through the Grassley Hourglass
soon to be emptied
the Grassley time count is 180 days and COUNTING!