Merrill Lynch Bonus, Merrill Lynch Disgruntled Employee, Merrill Lynch Employee, Merrill Lynch Employee Bonus, Merrill Lynch Feces
Merrill Lynch Bonus, Merrill Lynch Disgruntled Employee, Merrill Lynch Employee, Merrill Lynch Employee Bonus, Merrill Lynch Feces

CNBC: Merrill Employee "Inappropriately Relieved" Himself After Downsized Bonus

Dealbreaker.com   |   January 11, 2008 04:21 PM

Read More: Merrill Lynch Bonus, Merrill Lynch Disgruntled Employee, Merrill Lynch Employee, Merrill Lynch Employee Bonus, Merrill Lynch Feces, Breaking Business News
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Earlier this afternoon, CNBC's Charlie Gasparino reported that some guy in Merrill Lynch's fixed income research group had "inappropriately relieved" himself in protest of the downsizing of his bonus. Merrill has officially explained that this was simply an unfortunate accident, and then the bank turned red and scurried to the other side of the room.

We've been digging into this story because the way it's told by the delicate souls at CNBC, it's way to vague. What worse, the vagueness is giving rise to rumors that are totally untrue. It's fast becoming the Wall Street equivalent of an urban legends. Here's what didn't happen: a guy did not urinate on his desk because he was "pissed off." The real story is so much worse.

In the first place, it wasn't piss. It was shit. DealBreaker can confirm this much.

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- anastasiabeaverhousen See Profile I'm a Fan of anastasiabeaverhousen permalink

The excrement really did hit the oscillating unit this time!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 04:49 PM on 01/13/2008
- thepainter57 See Profile I'm a Fan of thepainter57 permalink

So he dropped a load, oh well I'm sure he felt much better.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:05 AM on 01/13/2008
- realitytrumpsbull See Profile I'm a Fan of realitytrumpsbull permalink

I'm glad he's disgruntled. Maybe he'll have lots of company when they finally find out how much shady business that this and other companies have been up to, they'll ALL be downsized...maybe it'll mean a huge drop in cocaine futures, but hey, when it rains it pours...

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 05:30 AM on 01/13/2008
- jimmyaj See Profile I'm a Fan of jimmyaj permalink

I guess everything's taking a shit in this market...

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:34 AM on 01/13/2008
- sparkandy See Profile I'm a Fan of sparkandy permalink

it's way to vague.

shame on you. you know better. i hope.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 06:14 AM on 01/12/2008
- larry278 See Profile I'm a Fan of larry278 permalink

Our foul, fetid, fiend at Merrill, Gooberfachey, Lunch & WotD'Hell makes a living by feeding his clients feces so fouling himself with his own crap can be expected. He could have bought his own crap & swallowed it too.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 12:46 AM on 01/12/2008
- JohnFromCensornati See Profile I'm a Fan of JohnFromCensornati permalink

They tell shit jokes on CNBC now?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 06:19 PM on 01/11/2008
- jmrozendaal See Profile I'm a Fan of jmrozendaal permalink

It does seem very wrong that anything should ever be downsized (or upsized) in the fixed income research group.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 05:02 PM on 01/11/2008
- jmrozendaal See Profile I'm a Fan of jmrozendaal permalink

It does seem very wrong that anything should ever be "downsized" (or "upsized") in the "fixed income research group."

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 04:59 PM on 01/11/2008
- Justinpassing See Profile I'm a Fan of Justinpassing permalink

BWAAAAAHAAAHAAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAA
I think I know that guy, when I was naive in l998 to 2000 and deep into the markets with Mother Merrill, He ended up shitting in my savings account.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 04:54 PM on 01/11/2008
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