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Jason Linkins

The Huffington Post

Clinton '3AM Phone' Ad Inspires Parody, Insipid Blog Posts

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March 2, 2008 03:03 PM



So, unless you've been living under a rock, you've seen the recent ad from the Clinton campaign in which your children are sleeping and it's 3AM and somewhere a phone is ringing and it's terrorists on the line and they're totally dialing M for MURDER and OMG! The call is coming from inside...the...house! But no worries because Hillary Clinton has thirty five years of experiences and is working the night shift and as long as you aren't from a caucus state or a state that doesn't have a lot of elderly Hispanic women, she is absolutely going to save you. It's a great ad, especially if you love, love, LOVE the complete works of Rudy Giuliani. Gee, whatever happened to him?

Anyway, the ad has inspired a response from Obama that basically says your kids are going to be fine because of that speech he once gave, so totally vote for him. It's also inspired at least one decent parody, which we've included below:

But if the "3AM Phone" has done nothing else, it at least can be considered the inspiration for the Dumbest Blog Post of the Election Season (So Far). Yes, courtesy of Ann Althouse comes this great example of why that dude who wrote The Cult Of The Amateur may be right - or at least an example of how one idiot blogger can make it really, really, really, really, really difficult to suggest that he is entirely wrong - in which we learn that the coincidental, microscopic, barely noticeable lettering on the child's pajamas in one brief instance of screen time is totally a subliminal racial slur. Ye gods, I kid you not. See for yourself.

Yes. The letters "N" and "I" appear on the clothing. Also, the letter "C" or "G!" And if it's "G", well, what does that subliminally tell you? Does it say, "GoodNIGht Moon?" Maybe, "NIGhtlight?" Maybe "beNIGn?" Maybe, "yellowcake from NIGer?" Or does it say something else? Maybe the title of the new Nas album or an old book by Dick Gregory?

Oh, Ann, Ann. What a waste of personal bandwidth. My dear, IF ONLY the people who made these ads were that clever. Typically speaking, political ads are ham-fisted expulsions of pure visual hackery where no one is being "artistic" or attempting to convey a message on some sublime, subliminal level. It's all about dropping the heaviest anvil onto the head of the viewer. There's just no way that the makers of this ad took the special time to frame the fold in the clothing JUST SO to send a secret message, like they were working on a J.J. Abrams show or something. Even if it were something they could do, what ad-man in their right mind would risk their career on the chance that they might end up being known as the person who dropped a racial slur into their commercial?

Althouse mentions the famous "RATS" ad from eight years ago, but I feel this is probably the exception that proves the rule. My guess is that the makers of that ad either never noticed "RATS" appeared on the screen, or if they did, found it to be an interesting example of happenstance that they chose to keep, never expecting it to blow up in their faces. Well, it didn't really win or lose anyone an election, but it sure bred a group of paranoiacs.

It wasn't long ago that people like Althouse were jumping up and down, claiming to have discovered a subliminal, floating Cross in a Mike Huckabee ad. What was Mike Huckabee trying to say with his secret floating cross, they wondered? Does the floating cross have a hidden message or meaning? Is Mike Huckabee trying to say that he loves Jesus or something? Well, heck! Maybe the floating cross WAS Mike Huckabee's way of secretly getting his pro-Jesus message out! Of course, that message may have also been communicated when Huckabee used his mouth to form words which he then spoke out loud and which conveyed that same message.

Anyway, congratulations to Ann Althouse and the methamphetamine enthusiasts who have worked themselves into a lather over this super-secret message. Keep reading between those lines with your awesome decoder rings and then blogging about it!

 
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I made my own Hillary 3AM parody combining phone sex, marvin gaye, the original 3AM ad, and some random Hillary footage!!!

ENJOY...

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=v5jzl9ujOBU

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:04 PM on 03/10/2008

FREAK!,JERK!,A$% H*%^!,CONSPIRACY THEORY FREAK!,IDIOT!,MO&*%$ &%##$@!, TURRETS
SYNDROME!,TYPE-O PRONE ILLITERATE!,........
These i can handle with aplomb! But "INSIPID".... YYYYYEEEEEEEOOOUUCH!
Besides, maybe I'm a little too used to having my blogs cut-off. Gee! I wonder why!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:44 PM on 03/06/2008

Check this Children Ad out-- it's the only one that goes after McCain

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYmSWCMAOd0

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 05:10 AM on 03/04/2008

The subtle pretext of your article, that Obama has done nothing worthwhile other than to give one speech is both disrespectful and offensive.

I suggest that you get your information about Senator Obama from sources other than the hillary campaign. A little unbiased reporting would show that Obama has contributed a great deal to this country including ethics reform, voting against Kyl-Lieberman (which your Liebfrau voted for). It is also evident by the constant crisis in the clinton campaign that Senator Obama is better at hiring staff, managing staff, managing a budget and getting his message out without all of the sleaze.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:00 AM on 03/03/2008
photo

I loved Bill Maher's take on this:

"It's 3 AM --
The phone rings.

Hillary sighs,

"Just wash off your cock, Bill. Hail a cab."

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:47 AM on 03/03/2008

McCain


We'll defeat terrorism as it should be fought
Never letting Satan's horde chase us to our door.
Safeguarding our borders and system of life
As our forefathers sacrificed before.

Never be afraid to be proud of America
And march with the brave, faithful and just.
Refusing to summit to the will of our enemies
Standing firm to preserve what we trust.

America has survived all attempts to destroy
Knowing the cruelty and sorrow of war
And we who remain must help keep her free
For those who can march no more!

Those who wish to be President
Must practice what they teach.
For their people need inspiring
To believe what they preach.

Take heed therefore, unto yourselves
You overseers of the flock
Or the voters shall cast you out
For your futures are not of rock.

Life may place us in deep waters
Though it doesn't wish us to drown.
It's our past record that lets others know
Who we are as we smile or frown.

If you wish to be remembered
From the truth you must never part.
Power corrupts the best of us
When we stop listening to our heart.


By Tom Zart

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:05 AM on 03/03/2008

There is a MUCH better parody ad out there: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99oat5t-w9w

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 08:51 AM on 03/03/2008

Its 3 AM...something is happening..."ring ring....(young woman's voice) ....um, is Bill there?"

Hillary: ready for that call on day one!

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 06:35 AM on 03/03/2008

Hillary honey, if you've been wearing a pantsuit to bed no wonder Bill has a roving eye.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 06:07 AM on 03/03/2008

So she bought into the Bush propaganda hook, line and sinker. Listen to this video as she touts the BushCo line of BS.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYATbsu2cP8&feature=related

Yes, I know Saddam was a rotten bastard. We all know that. So is Kim Jong Il. But Saddam didn't have the WMD's that Hillary lists in this video. If she'd read the Intelliegence report she'd have been well informed, and possible not have made such a disasterous vote. Is this the kind of person we want answering that red phone at 3 am? The kind of president who doesn't read reports? We already have that kind of president, don't we?
Here is where she explains to Tim Russert why she didn't read it.

http://eternalhope.blog-city.com/hillary_clinton_never_read_iraq_intelligence_reports.htm

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:05 PM on 03/02/2008

read joe wilson's blog posted on this site

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:34 PM on 03/02/2008

Guess my wife is qualified to go my job in the morning and do it. If u was to have surgery done i guess u wouldn't mind the doctor sending her husband. What exprience does Hill have she could didn't even know Bill was Creepin in the White House. Who really wants her with her finger 9on the trigger? Guess she thought Bill was running out for chinese on those nights. If the press was not really in love with Hillary someone would ask what exprience are u talkin about?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:43 PM on 03/02/2008

Ugh. Let's pretend like Bill was an attorney, served as a governor, and then president, and Hillary was a homemaker. Then you'd have a point. As it is, she was also an attorney and did just a little bit more than pack Bill's lunches before and after he got to the White House. She was actually an ambassador who carried out diplomatic missions and led task forces that were part of the administration's agenda.

To answer your question with a question, it depends, is the doctor's husband a doctor as well? If he/she actually ends up being someone who has participated in some of the heavy lifting of this hypothetical practice, then I'd say yeah, send hubby/wifey over to look at my spleen.

You honestly think Michelle Obama is going to play housewife if Barack wins the election? Right, a Harvard graduated attorney just sitting on her hands. She doesn't have the political inclination like Hillary does/did, but to say that a highly educated partner who has the chops to really throw in to the efforts at hand would somehow stand by in zombie mode for the duration of the administration is just asinine. More power to Michelle if she can work as an extension of the office to accomplish a greater good. If the Obamas go all the way, perhaps we'll watch Michelle and witness echoes of a certain Senator's time in the White House?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:34 PM on 03/02/2008

That was an excellent post mutatio, One of the best I have read on these blogs, I have made the exact same point about the relevance of her experience. As a lawyer and her campaign experience along with the fact that if you are the CIC and have a real problem and you happen to be married to a genius, she could be the person to get an opinion from unless you are dumber than a rock. She probably was born quoting Shakespeare. If any of the people on here want to question her experience, just go to Hillary Clinton Wikipedia - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hillary_clinton

and read her bio. One of her friends in college predicted she would be the first woman President. She is truely a gifted person. Voted one of our countries top 100 lawyers twice, awards for her work from around the world. They may not like her personality, but to question her capabilities only exposes the writers ignorance and state of denial they float in.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 03:33 AM on 03/03/2008

"She was actually an ambassador who carried out diplomatic missions and led task forces that were part of the administration's agenda."

If this is all that it takes, then Nancy Reagan is more qualified than hillary

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:02 AM on 03/03/2008

read joe wilson's blog posted on this site

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:34 PM on 03/02/2008

Like I said before - what Hillary would do when she answered the red phone would depend on what mood she is in at the time. Hell, we've seen her change moods 3 or 4 times during a debate.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:40 PM on 03/02/2008
photo

Dear Jason Lincoln -

You are CORRECT, Sir! Hillary's ad was, in a word, INSPIRING!

That's the kind of INSPIRATION we need in the next president of the USA. Any idiot can make people feel good. But it takes a special person like our Dear Leader to make us feel really, really bad - bad enough to actually do something about it.

Meanwhile, I just heard that no less a program than the esteemed "60 Minutes" is reporting that Hussein Obamam doesn't even know the words to the Star Spangled Banner.

Can you imagine that! Is this the kind of muslim we want in the Oval Office? It's shameful, I tell you. SHAMEFUL!

Sincerely,

Your Friend OTAYPANKY

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 08:52 PM on 03/02/2008

Really can some of the Hill lovers ask her when between the years of 1992 thru 2000 she got a call at 3 am in the morning and the fate of the free world depended on her anwser. Only way some like that happened is Bill was creepin with an intern do the Hall.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:37 PM on 03/02/2008

Hey Bill wake up it is 3:00 A.M. and there is someone calling herself Flowers,did you order flowers for me.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:42 PM on 03/02/2008

Otay - You dumb bastard - 60 minutes interviewed an idiot who said he heard Obama didn't know the National anthem and was a muslem - the 60 minute interviewer told him flat out that this wasn't true. Really - anybody who believes this is just a dumb bastard - and anybody who passes it on is a damned liar and in danger of Hellfire.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 09:44 PM on 03/02/2008
photo

It was satire. Or are you satirically impaired?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 10:06 PM on 03/02/2008
photo

armadillus writes: Otay - You dumb bastard - 60 minutes interviewed an idiot who said he heard Obama didn't know the National anthem and was a muslem - the 60 minute interviewer told him flat out that this wasn't true. Really - anybody who believes this is just a dumb bastard - and anybody who passes it on is a damned liar and in danger of Hellfire.

===

Dear armadoofus -

Thank you SO MUCH for helping me to understand better what is going on here.

That's the beauty of the internets. Because it's a series of tubes, we are all connected - and can help one another out in ways we never could before.

So keep up the good work...and let's ask the good Lord above (or below as the case might be) to bless our Dear Leader and lay a wicked pox on the mulsim guy!

Sincerely -

Your Friend OTAYPANKY

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:33 PM on 03/02/2008

it's 3-0AM--do you want Jennifer,Monica or Juanita answering the phone?

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 07:26 PM on 03/02/2008

Obama is the least neurotic politician I've ever seen. The man's level of calm confidence is amazing. I have no doubt that he'd respond appropriately in any emergency. Hillary is the one who has been erratic in this campaign.

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 07:20 PM on 03/02/2008

read joe wilson's blog posted on this site

    Favorite    Flag as abusive Posted 11:36 PM on 03/02/2008
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