Colbert Lets 5th Grader Andy Gellman Argue Against Longer School Hours On Economic Grounds (VIDEO)

Fifth Grader Andrew Gellman took over for Stephen Colbert last night, doing the "Word" segment with the same ironic arguments and flare for the absurd as his older counterpart. Andy "sided" with Fox News's Gretchen Carlson arguing that the future of summer camps and after school programs is more important than the future of our children. (PS -- We now want Andy Gellman to blog for us!)



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Comments

[dadw5boys]

Change the Culture change Education.

[Anthony Ynohtna]

that was.......awesome. i actually wish school was longer when i went. and yea. 8 effing months!!!!!

[FunPie]

This was genius. Obama could find a way to turn every person in America into a millionaire engineering genius who's beautiful and has great sex all the time, and Fox "News" would find a way to complain that he's killing small businesses.

https://thefunpie.wordpress.com/

[filo]

Stephen Colbert.....My favorite Fundit.

[HC4BO]

Seriously, it's been 8 months ... !

[KarenGeorgetown]

Absolutely! One of the most difficult things to teach people is not to step on the laughs... wait until the audience 'almost' stops laughing. Andy is a natural.

[113]

haha that was funny, he did a good job.

[LetsGetDumbAmerica]

Look, I'm sorry but I just don't find Andrew Gellman funny anymore.

Sure he made a big splash but theres a reason why his "success" is so flash-pan. Good timing and a fresh face. Big deal. Throw a rock in the air and you'll hit plenty of starving fifth grade comics looking for that same break. And those Brooklyn Fifth Grade Comics are dog eat dog; they don't f#*k around. They paid THEIR dues.

What about you Gellman?! Have you ever rocked the brick background to an indignant drunk audience- back to back with soccer tryouts and then the subway home to Mom's meatloaf?!

Psst. Hardly, is what I imagine.

[Design4you]

Yeah, this kid is already a has-been.

[totophonehome]

I grew up very poor, sometimes without running water or electricity. My mother worked herself to the bone to provide us with the bare necessities. I went to school every day and passed all my tests. Today, I'm an HR manager at a law firm. However, I agree with the concept of longer school year - especially in larger cities that have crime associated with unsupervised teens after 2pm and thousands of kids who still don't know the different between to, too and there and their (like so many posters on this site as well). I commute to work from Jackson Sq near the largest project in Boston. Coming home from work I walk past hordes of rowdy, disrespectful teens just "hanging out" after school is out around 2pm. As I walk by, they shout crude comments about me and I've even had firecrackers thrown at me as I walk by them. It seems that even a good kid with a lot of potential can make bad decisions with 3 hours to kill before their parents expect them home (if they even do). What is the harm with these kids, instead of causing trouble, being forced to improve their math, reading, science scores? If you can pass these tests, then you most likely don't need the extra schooling and are free to attend your fancy Maine summer camp or your inner-city youth program, otherwise you are in school during the summer until you can pass.

[mbondr1]

My 3rd grader currenly has an extra hour for extended tutoring after school. He also gets about an hour of homework. My 8th grader gets about 3 hours of homework a night and reports on the weekends. Grading is brutal. They work harder than I do in graduate school.

The problem is not America's schools. It's America. Kids who come to school hungry, kids who have parents who work 16 hours a day and can't help them, and kids who just plain have lost all hope.

Punishment as a solution to all problems is a solution for idiots. I think Obama needs some for time at schoo.

[terribyte]

I was with you right up until your ending sentence.
Punishment?

[JadedAggie]

Um..If your child views school as punishment that would be part of the problem.

[ubatuba]

cry me a river...Americans aren't the only ones who work long hours. That's one of the reasons the rest of the world has their kids in school longer. American women work and live like dogs...overworked, overstressed, too many responsibilities. Don't you see this? Let the kids stay in school longer, benefit from a broader education and american women (and men) don't need to curtail everything they do to rush home for 3:00 pick up. Obviously...there has to be something meaningful in those extra hours, and kids need to be taught respect, etc....but it's a start...

[Zelyony1750]

What was the original reason for letting kids out of school for the summer? If I am not mistaken, it was for the children to help their parents on the farm. But large machines do the agricultural work on huge corporate farms, not family-run farms. When I was a kid, being off in the summertime was kind of boring. My parents, had to work all of the time and we lived in the city. So where is a kid supposed to go? No, make the summer vacations shorter. At least the city kids won't get so bored.

[firewmn]

kids just crack me up..!..lol.. word

[Newthron]

The future is walking with not only a head on its shoulder, but with a brain in that head.

[tb92]

There is hope! There are a lot of great kids in this country. Let's get them an educational system that actually works.

[JL-Sosa]

That's socialist talk! *tongue meet cheek*

[waterbuffalo]

Wow!!! He nailed it.

If fox news and republicans rule long enough, free market will help summer camp can more straight into to the school and replace all the science and math teachers with burger flippers.

[NotMyGod]

I can only assume Colbert is grooming that kid to be his successor. I'm a huge Colbert fan and I think this was the only time he let someone else do The Word.
The kid makes some good points, but he left out that extending the summer would have the additional advantage of combating childhood obesity. It's like this: kids will just get fatter sitting at the desks in school all year, but in the summer, they can use all that time to exercise-- which in turn means more money for industries like gyms, sports camps, Dance Dance Revolution, etc.

[Helanren]

Plus, extending the summer would take care of at least part of the global heating problem!