11 Most Paranoid Obama Conspiracy Theories

In honor of Obama's November 4th anniversary, we've pulled together for you the most paranoid trips down the Obama conspiracy rabbit hole. Birthers, fake thesis, satanic messages, we've got it covered. Some of the theories here have faded since their conception, but some are still giving off that iridescent glow of insanity and total inaccuracy. Now vote to let us know which one you think is the craziest.

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• Obama Is Not An American Citizen

  One of the most popular Obama conspiracy theories (aka the Birther Movement), endorsed (or not denied) by the likes of <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/_263532.html">Tom Delay</a>, <a href=http://www.huffingtonpost.com/_251393.html>Lou Dobbs</a>, <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/_250891.html">Chuck Norris</a> and <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/_242555.html">Liz Cheney</a>, it claims that Obama is not an American citizen, thus rendering his presidency illegitimate, or something. The theory hinges on the false claim that his birth certificate is fake. Birther queen Orly Taitz (a lawyer and dentist from California) continues to lead the march, despite her lawsuit getting <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/29/orly-taitz-lawsuit-thrown_n_338870.html">thrown out</a> and a <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/13/orly-taitz-slapped-with-2_n_318546.html">$20,000 fine</a>.

• Obama Wants "Re-Education Camps For Young People

  Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.), a proponent of many bizarre and outlandish critiques of President Obama, declared in April that the White House was trying to install <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/04/06/bachmann-obama-wants-re-e_n_183552.html">youth re-education camps</a>. "It's under the guise of -- quote -- volunteerism. But it's not volunteers at all. It's paying people to do work on behalf of government," said the Minnesota Republican. "I believe that there is a very strong chance that we will see that young people will be put into mandatory service. And the real concerns is that there are provisions for what I would call re-education camps for young people, where young people have to go and get trained in a philosophy that the government puts forward and then they have to go to work in some of these politically correct forums."

• Larry Sinclair's Rabbit Hole Of Insanity

  This one is a doozy. Larry Sinclair, <a href="http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0608/11164.html">a petty criminal specializing in forgery</a>, spread wild accusations via YouTube involving <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/06/18/obama-accuser-larry-sincl_n_107900.html">gay sex, drugs and possible murder committed by Barack Obama</a>. At one point reporters apparently took Sinclair seriously enough to attend a press conference he gave, most remarkable for his lawyer's appearance in a kilt, which he explained was intended to secure comfort for his unusually large sexual organs: "Those at the other end of the spectrum find [pants] quite confining."

• The Case Of The Fake Thesis

  In which a group of right-wingers get taken in by a satiric blog post on Barack Obama's college thesis, written ages ago, and frantically presented as real. The post, which was tagged as SATIRE, described how <em>Time</em> Magazine's Joe Klein had obtained ten pages of a thesis written by Barack Obama, in which he wrote about how the Constitution was "inherently flawed." Then Rush Limbaugh and Michael Ledeen presented this story as <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/10/23/fake-obama-thesis-story-g_n_332255.html">fact</a>.

• Bill Ayers Wrote 'Dreams From My Father"

  A popular theory on right-wing websites like <a href="http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/2101151/posts">The Free Republic</a>, <a href="http://www.americanthinker.com/2008/10/who_wrote_dreams_from_my_fathe_1.html">American Thinker</a> and <a href="http://www.wnd.com/?pageId=110784">WorldNetDaily</a>, claiming that educator (and former radical) Bill Ayers helped Obama write "Dreams Of My Father." There is <a href="http://www.obamaconspiracy.org/category/books/">no evidence</a> supporting this claim.

• Obama As Antichrist

  Is Obama the Antichrist? <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDB5BFoSQLs&feature=player_embedded">These</a> <a href="http://www.snopes.com/politics/obama/antichrist.asp">folks</a> think maybe so. McCain also verged on endorsing this theory during the campaign season with an attack ad called "<a href="http://www.time.com/time/politics/article/0,8599,1830590,00.html">The One.</a>"

• Obama As Muslim

  A theory that began circulating during the campaign season and has been kept alive by Tea Partiers, and other ultra-conservatives. It's taken different forms over the year (<a href="http://www.scribd.com/doc/6516016/Will-Obama-Swearin-on-the-Holy-Koran-or-the-Holy-Bible-After-Attacking-Jesus-Sermon-on-the-Mount">Will Obama be sworn into office on Qur'an??</a>, asks one website.) Most recently Tea Party leader Mark Williams had a meltdown on CNN, and <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/09/15/tea-party-leader-melts-do_n_286933.html">claimed</a> that Obama was an "Indonesian Muslim" and a "welfare thug." According to Obama and those who know him, this is not so.

• Tells America In His Acceptance Speech To "Serve Satan"

  Ever listened to Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" backwards? How about Obama's presidential acceptance speech? This video suggests that the speech, like the Zeppelin song, contains a Satanic message when played in reverse. Go ahead - take a bong hit, try it and tell us what you hear.

• Hugo Chavez Funded The Obama Campaign

  Did Hugo Chavez fund the Obama campaign? No. But some people thought so after a Fox News affiliate issued a false report claiming that <a href="http://www.snopes.com/politics/obama/chavez.asp">he did</a>.

• Michelle Banished Barack's Girlfriend To The Caribbean

  One of the few conspiracy theories to go after the Obamas' marriage. The claim is that Michelle banished Barack's female aide (and suspected lover) to the Caribbean. Every person involved, including the woman, says this is <a href="http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/worldnews/article-1076695/Obama-hit-affair-smears-following-claims-attractive-aide-banned-wife.html">false</a>.

• Obama Is Malcolm X's Son

  Initiated by the author of the <a href="http://atlasshrugs2000.typepad.com/atlas_shrugs/2008/10/how-could-stanl.html">Atlas Shrugged</a> blog and claiming that Obama is actually Malcolm X's son. As Ezra Klein <a href="http://www.prospect.org/csnc/blogs/ezraklein_archive?month=10&year=2008&base_name=obama_x">pointed out</a> at the time: "Honestly, who wouldn't give Malcolm props for that one?" Klein continued: "And think there's anyway we can fit Tupac into the bloodline? Or maybe Obama actually is Tupac? You know that whole shooting was some bullshit, right? Incidentally, I see no reason to stop with Malcolm. History is full of great Xs for Barack Obama to be related to. Professor X, which would explain why millions of white people lose their minds in his presence. Weapon X, which would explain the adamantium grafted onto his skeleton. XML, which would explain why it's so easy to structure his data. I'm sure there are others."

Comments

[fuelie]

07:42 PM on 11/04/2009

This is just one example of why I continue to say that Homo Sapiens is an incredibly backward, savage, immature, and uncivilized form of sentient life, that we are not much better than Cro-Magnan man, and that it will take about 300 to 500 more years for Homo Sapiens to become a mature, civilized, peaceful society of sentient life forms inhabiting Spaceship Earth.

[Mulvaney]

07:35 PM on 11/04/2009

My own theory was that the African Nation used Nigerans to skim the American economy until it was on the verge of collapse, using a foreign born Obama as a sleeper agent until the time was right, allowing him to impose a new world order with the African Nation in charge, a plan which was almost derailed until Obama himself snuck away while visiting his grandmother in Hawaii and did a daring commando raid upon state offices to make sure his birth certificate was in place while the nation's press was distracted by an Obama double who was showing off at the beach while other operatives used hidden mind control techniques to order John McCain to pick Palin as his VP candidate to ensure the election result and planes flew overhead releasing substances in the air that made the American people focus on change.

[OnePartyEqualsTyranny]

07:02 PM on 11/04/2009

Republicans and their enablers can fall into two categories: fanatical or sociopathic,
and often, both at the same time.

[skinsqb17]

05:13 PM on 11/04/2009

anything to keep from dealing with the reality of record numbers of votes cast by people of color. teabaggers are identified most easily by their inability to produce melanin.

[RG5626]

04:57 PM on 11/04/2009

Obama is not a muslim..........as far as I know. (as Hiliary would say)

Even our SoS could not resist letting that lie contiue during the campaign.

[RevSpaminator]

03:52 PM on 11/04/2009

You left out some other important Obama conspiracy theories...

Obama is a member of a Hawaiian Volcano Cult and wants to make offerings of our children!

Obama is not a human being at all, but in fact he is part of a Martian invasion that plans to capture our women and breed them with Martians to develop a race of Super Warriors.

Obama likes getting his feet washed..no wait, that was Jesus.

Michelle is actually the goddess Eris in human form. (Golden apple anyone?)

A little creativity (and a few stiff drinks) and you too can invent your own wild conspiracy theories. :)

[SATTA]

03:37 PM on 11/04/2009

When I vote for a president ,I'd liked him/her to run the country well for the people; & don't care if he/she was born in Mars & worship no god. On the other hand, we had presidents past who are US born, christian, family valued,etc. but messed things up for us domestically & ruined foreign relations.

[missgeorge]

02:56 PM on 11/04/2009

don't be so biased, if all of these claims were against a republican, then you would assume they are all true...where there is smoke there is fire

[cybexg]

02:52 PM on 11/04/2009

Wait...these conspiracy theories come from the Right Wing......Does this say something about the Right WIng?

[booboo111]

02:22 PM on 11/04/2009

How can you not love a woman named Oily!.................................Oh, it's Orly, o.k., never mind.

[falco]

02:10 PM on 11/04/2009

Next thing you know they will be saying he's a clone, made with reptilian shape shifting genetics and that his entire administration is as well!

[RevSpaminator]

03:57 PM on 11/04/2009

If they do, make sure you get credit for the idea. I'm still waiting for someone to pick up on my theory of Spam.

[MarkInTexas]

06:13 PM on 11/04/2009

Since I'm reading this on the internet, it must be true.

[hardrain77]

02:09 PM on 11/04/2009

My favorite paranoid theory is the one about how Obama was supposed to have been elected by the people to bring change to Washington, but it was all a pretty ploy to keep the Bankers and Goldman Sachs in control as the barons looted the remainder of this country while we are all distracted talking about how much Rush hates him or that he wasn't born here.

That's a crazy one.

[CalifroniaMark]

01:19 PM on 11/04/2009

For arguements sake let's say she is right and she proves Pres. Obama was not born in america, Whats in it for her? A book deal? Notoriety? Big name talk shows? A brand new bank account?

Some people have way too much time on their hands...Lady get a life!

[wolfmason]

12:26 PM on 11/04/2009

My favorite theory is that Taitz is an Obama admin. plant used to draw attention from The Real Threat of Obama's secret agenda. The conspiracy is a conspiracy to cover up yet another undefined conspiracy!!!! How can you not love that!

[beelzabubbleboy]

12:11 PM on 11/04/2009

testing--1,2,3.......

[soundping]

06:32 PM on 11/04/2009

Same problem here.