Dana Milbank Attempts To Resurrect Viral Video Comedy Career (VIDEO)

OMFG, Dana Milbank! Were you not paying attention to the year, 2009, which famously rose up with one clear voice to call for the immediate death of "Mouthpiece Theatre?"

Apparently not, because here he is roaming the streets of Washington, DC, encountering skimpily-clad PETA protesters in front of a Burger King, and using their example as the inspiration to "hilariously" urge people to save newspapers by boycotting the Internet! In case you are some sort of lichen, or moss, or bit of toenail fungus, the "joke" here is that one must create a viral video on the Internet to get people to stop looking at viral videos on the Internet and instead opt to read a newspaper, where Dana Milbank will never ever dress up in newspaper scraps and talk to you about saving newspapers.

"It was cold outside, and it was time for lunch," Milbank concluded, because somebody had already used the line, "So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past."

Anyway, yes: please save the newspapers, except for the part of the paper where they allow their reporters to play out their undergraduate art-trash confrontations with irony. That part should be dispatched, without any concern for the ethical treatment of anyone involved.

[WATCH, ON DRUGS]

RELATED, IN THAT THIS IS THE "COMEDY" THAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU EAT TOO MUCH AMMONIA-INJECTED BEEF:
Safety of Beef Processing Method Is Questioned [New York Times]

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