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With the 111th Congress adjourned and the car exhaust of roughly 535 mad dashes to National Airport blanketing the capital, America phoned it in one more time before Christmas. Democratic staffers continued to work out a filibuster reform framework. John Boehner announced his new communications team, including a speechwriter to make his words sound as pretty as his tangelo-hued skin looks. And White House contender Jimmy McMillan didn't take our big tent advice and adopt a "Death Tax Moratorium Is Too Damn Temporary" platform. This is HUFFPOST HILL for Thursday, December 23rd, 2010:
BOEHNER FINALIZES COMM TEAM - The speaker-designate announced his press shop's starting day lineup this afternoon. Michael Steel, who likes driving angry lefty traffic to Boehner's YouTube page almost as much as he enjoys curling up with Natty Light and a thick biography of a British colonial leader, will continue as top flack, handling the rabble in the Capitol press corps. Longtime hand Brendan Buck will join on as press secretary for the White House hacks. Michael Ricci, as speechwriting director, will search for ever more ways to work "crap," "poop," and "doodie" into the speaker's addresses. Don Seymour will be deputy communications director.
JEREMY THE INTERN BIDS FAREWELL TO HUFFPOST - Our weather wunderkind Jeremy Binckes signed off as a Huffington Post intern today. Although Jeremy will continue to grace HuffPost Hill with his insanely popular weather updates (we need a new name for those), he will no longer provide our office the undeniable pleasures of his magnetic presence. Anyone interested in developing a professional relationship with this walking, breathing, category 5 tropical system of talent should e-mail JB at jbinckes@gmail.com Thanks for everything, JB!
HuffPost Hill programming note: We will be off tomorrow but back next week. Merry Atheist Tree Day and Happy Eurocentric New Year, everyone! And Merry Socialist Solstice, too, of course.
BIPARTISAN GROUP OF LAWMAKERS PUSHING FOR PETRAEUS TESTIMONY - Amanda Terkel: "It's the rare issue that can unite Reps. John Conyers (D-Mich.) and Buck McKeon (R-Calif.): the call for Gen. David Petraeus to testify before Congress about the war in Afghanistan. Conyers, who chairs the Out of Afghanistan Caucus, sent a letter to President Obama Thursday, requesting that he make the general available to House lawmakers to speak on the administration's recently released strategic review and conditions on the ground in Afghanistan. The letter has the signatures of 30 other Democrats...McKeon, who will chair the House Armed Services Committee in the new Congress, has also called for the administration to allow Petraeus to testify next year." [HuffPost]
DAILY DELANEY DOWNER - It's a sad holiday time for the long-term unemployed, no doubt about it. Ninety-niner Paladinette has a Christmas song for Congress in the style of "Santa Baby." "The car got repoed and the rent is awfully late, but wait! You only care for the rich. That's a bitch! There's millions of us dying out here." Paladinette seems pissed Democrats introduced a bunch of phony 99er bills but couldn't find a way to help them in the Rich People's Tax Cuts Bonanza Act of 2010. [YouTube]
HUFFPOST HILL'S NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION FOR PARANOID SELF-LOATHING GOP LOBBYIST - In the spirit of giving, HuffPost Hill has a New Year's Resolution for Our Favorite Paranoid Self-Loathing GOP Lobbyist, who measures a year in 525,600 minutes...and number of panic attacks. On the tenth day of Christmas, NYRFOFPSLGOPL said to me: "Hate yourself less, friend, and enjoy the new year." And a partridge in a pear tree! Mwah!
Don't be bashful: Send tips/stories/photos/events/fundraisers/job movement/juicy miscellanea to huffposthill@huffingtonpost.com. Follow us on Twitter - @HuffPostHill
HARRY REID BACKS FILIBUSTER REFORM - Greg Sargent: "Various ideas making the rounds include everything from proposals to make senators actually filibuster to tinkering with the vote number threshold to start and end debate. Dems are also coalescing behind the so-called 'constitutional option,' which has it that each new Congress has the right to set its own rules by simple majority vote." Reforming Senate rules is, essentially, the legislative equivalent of shiving someone on your first day in the clink to establish your unwillingness to be sold to a guy named Dandelion for seven cartons and three days of laundry duty. The vice president must be present on the first day to rule that the Senate can rewrite the chamber's rules, leading to an up-or-down vote on the changes. Democrats beware: Mitch McConnell and his friends are lining up a series of House-approved legislation they'd liked passed...plus they think you have awful purty faces. [WaPo]
KARL ROVE'S ACCIDENTAL 2012 REELECTION PREDICTION - Or not so accidental?.....ehhh? Last night on Fox, America's foremost Republican strategist--taking a break from miniaturizing, dressing in a devil costume, perching himself on people's shoulders, and whispering that they invest heavily in Monsanto-- weighed in on Hillary Clinton's electoral prospects. "I suspect she will be a candidate," he said. "I suspect she is going to think about being a candidate in 2016, and we'll know by about 2014. If she leaves the [Obama] Administration in 2014 or 2015, in order to give herself a chance to write a book about her experiences and reconnect with the grassroots, then she might entertain it." Jindal 2016 starts here, people. [Daily Intel]
HUFFPOST HILL FACT OF LIFE - Single-celled microorganisms, the earliest known organism, emerged three-to-four billion years ago.
RAHM EMANUEL DEEMED RESIDENT-Y ENOUGH TO RUN FOR MAYOR - It's a mother ff&#$%@ Christmas miracle! The Chicago Election Board today ruled 3-0 that Rahm Emanuel passes the city's residency requirements and is eligible to run for mayor. This is likely attributable to Emanuel's magical junk pit that he kept hidden from his tenant while he was in Washington serving as President Obama's COS. Whether this development sets the precedent that anyone can run for office anywhere so long as they have a whole lot of crap remotely stowed away remains to be seen. We give it a few years until someone with a timeshare in Vail makes a play for Mark Udall's Senate seat. It'll only go south from there ("Despite accusations of carpetbagging, Providence, Rhode Island-native Joe Blow's Los Angeles mayoral bid was green-lit this afternoon when it was disclosed that he once relieved his bladder on Robin Williams' Walk of Fame star," etc). [Sun Times]
BECAUSE YOU'VE READ THIS FAR - Seasons Greetings from this drone. [http://bit.ly/gx4qbj]
JIMMY 'RENT IS TOO DAMN HIGH' MCMILLAN TO MAKE WHITE HOUSE BID - A storm is brewing in the East. The once and future standard bearer for New York's "Rent Is Too Damn High" Party went on a libertarian Internet radio show yesterday (and is there really any other way to stage a putsch these days?) to announce that he will seek the White House in 2012. "If you don't do your job right, I am coming at you. I know Barack Obama is an Internet hog. I know he knows that I am out there. But what he hasn't heard yet is that Jimmy McMillan is running for President of the United States of America," everyone's favorite Mr. T-ninja hybrid and tenant rights activist said. "Well Barack Obama, you might as well turn your Internet up. Go to the website, President. I want you to look at all the hits Sarah Palin got. I ate her up. Look at all the hits John McCain got. I chewed him up. Look at all the hits Hillary Clinton had, I swallowed her, chewed her up and spit her out. Jimmy McMillan is well-known.'" [Observer]
Coalition-broadening campaign platforms: "Military families are too damn neglected," "The banks are too damn big to fail," The health care mandate is too damn unconstitutional," "Al Qaeda unchecked spread into Iran is too damn unnerving," "The Fed is too damn un-audited," "Anchor babies are too damn naturalized," "That fetus is too damn a sentient being." #McMillan2012
Pat Robertson thinks weed should be legalized: "I mean, I'm not exactly for the use of drugs, don't get me wrong. But I just believe criminalizing marijuana, criminalizing the possession of just a few ounces of pot, and that kind of thing, I mean it's costing us a fortune, and it's ruining young people. The young people go into prisons, they go in as youths, and they come out as hardened criminals, and it's not a good thing." Amen. [Politics Daily]
JEREMY THE INTERN'S WEATHER REPORT -Tonight For those heading out tonight to regions near and far, there's some good news to be had. Most of the U.S. has clear weather, including D.C. airports, with the caveat that strong winds may cause some delays if it gets stronger or the wind directions shift. But if you're driving, it should be nice and clear. Your Ho-ho-holiday weekend: It's sunny on Friday, cloudy on Saturday, with scattered snow showers Sunday heading into Monday. But if you're like me and going on vacation, it should not matter. Happy new year! Thanks, JB!
COMFORT FOOD
- A holiday list from our friends at HuffPost Comedy: The 13 funniest Christmas songs. [http://huff.to/dWmGWE]
- Hear the actual speech by King George VI featured in "The King's Speech."[http://bbc.in/hZvw2w]
- Chinese robot waiters are, if you ask us, just Chinese robot warriors in training. Everyone look out. [http://bit.ly/hBvyR6]
- We're pleased to introduce you to 50 cats in Santa Hats [http://on.vh1.com/g7H4KZ]
- Behold the dog with a giant vocabulary. [http://bit.ly/hGKI2H]
- The Economist explains population growth forecasts. ROCK ON. [http://econ.st/aBwwaY]
- Whether its a baby or an eggplant, "Monkey hugs X" videos are our favorite. [http://bit.ly/fK51rH]
- Someone lost a bet. [http://bit.ly/fcgOpS]
TWITTERAMA
@jcbeam: One way to make TSA patdowns more friendly could be to have agents dress as
Santa.
@mattklewis:Christmas Eve Eve feels like a Holiday, but Christmas Eve Eve Eve felt like a totally normal work day. ... Just me?
@fishbowldc: Best of luck to HuffPost intern Jeremy Binckes. We had the honor of interviewing him in the summer. Guy knows his weather.
ON TAP
TONIGHT
6:00 pm: Nine D.C.-area 55-and-over choirs gather to perform holiday songs. Great for bachelor parties [Kennedy Center Millennium Stage, 2700 F Street NW].
8:00 pm - 10:00 pm: After you're done singing with the elderly, head over to the main stage for the annual Messiah sing along [Kennedy Center Concert Hall, 2700 F Street NW].
TOMORROW
It's Christmas Eve Day, dawgs!
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