'Jeopardy' Robots & 7 Other Signs We're Doomed In A Robot Apocalypse (PHOTOS)

IBM reached a technological milestone with the reveal of "Watson", an artificial intelligence program so advanced that it has the ability to interpret wordplay and subtle hints. Everyone's seen the movies (and some have even read the books) about the possibility of a robot uprising. These various forms of "entertainment" downplay the potential Armageddon that could be brought on by the technology we love. The idea of the human race being destroyed by a Roomba is a laughable prospect to most people, but the advent of "Watson" and his victory in a practice round against "Jeopardy" dynamos Ken Jennings and Brad Rutter changes things. Science Fiction is quickly becoming reality and your Roomba may be getting smarter -- smart enough to kill you.

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Jeopardy Robots

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It's official, our brightest minds in the field of random trivia have been defeated by a robot that humanity created. The biggest implication of this is that if a robot can beat Ken Jennings in the category of "Potent Potables" what chance do our other great thinkers have against AI? If our genius scientists and intellectuals are outsmarted then what chance do our military leaders and politicians have? The short answer is "none". By creating AI that's more intelligent than the smartest human, mankind has put its own extinction into motion. It's only a matter of time before the AI decides to create an army to assert its superiority over the feeble-minded humans. Once this happens we will surely be doomed and the human race will end because of an attempt to impress Alex Trebek.

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It's official, our brightest minds in the field of random trivia have been defeated by a robot that humanity created. The biggest implication of this is that if a robot can beat Ken Jennings in the category of "Potent Potables" what chance do our other great thinkers have against AI? If our genius scientists and intellectuals are outsmarted then what chance do our military leaders and politicians have? The short answer is "none". By creating AI that's more intelligent than the smartest human, mankind has put its own extinction into motion. It's only a matter of time before the AI decides to create an army to assert its superiority over the feeble-minded humans. Once this happens we will surely be doomed and the human race will end because of an attempt to impress Alex Trebek.

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This Deadly Possibility

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Not too bad WE'RE SCREWED

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Top 5 Reasons We're Doomed

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Comments

[hagagaga]

07:58 AM on 02/16/2011

I'm sorry, commenter, I'm afraid I can't let you post that.

[laoshi]

05:52 PM on 02/11/2011

"Even in the future nothing works." (Dark Helmut).

There will be robots, but they'll have "Out of order" signs on them.

[BillMyers]

02:39 PM on 02/08/2011

What we really need is a robot for President.

[Forester]

01:13 AM on 02/05/2011

Technological unity must be stopped before humans are exterminated by the robot race.

[Timothy Grome]

11:20 AM on 01/27/2011

How many of you remember the "Twilight Zone" episode in which the CEO replaced all the factory workers with robots. In the end we see "Robby the Robot" (Yes the same one from "Forbidden Planet" and "Lost in Space") looking at a gold watch in the CEO's office.

Already financial trades are being performed by A.I. algorhythms. Considering that decisions in the boardroom are made in response to share value, there is a level of robot control of corporations. It is a matter of time before the first computer CEO. When that corporation becomes profitable then A.I. corporate management will proliferate.

The CEObots will then funnel capital through lobbyists into the Capitol and take effective control of law-making. That's already going on with flesh-bag CEO's, but CEObots will be far more effective. Before long the progressive income tax will be replaced by a head tax. Multi-billion $ corporations will have the same tax liability as the underemployed they laid off. The head tax law will be written so than those who cannot afford to pay can have another person (corporations are persons) pay for them for which the tax scofflaw will be bound for a year in indentured servitude. Since the indentured won't be able earn money to pay the following year's tax he/she will become the propertery of the person paying his or her head tax. Along with servitude paying another person's head tax for them will also get their votes (no taxation without representation).

[Oscar Groom]

12:56 AM on 01/27/2011

Robots/AI would phase themselves out as they have no extended objectives past their initial set parameters. They are and always will be tools of sentients as they represent the realization of mathematical superiority and implementation. Clothing could be thought of as a lower form of intelligence as it performs calculable functions, example: regulating external body temperature of set being or object. Form follows function. The saying, "we are doomed" is error. If you think you are that body then you are unclear in your perception of reality. The body is a tool. If you throw a wad of paper into a basket are you performing the math to make the shot? No, your body is. Your bio-computer brain is. You are the experiencer of this reality. The ghost in the machine. Every day is the "end of the world" for someone, somewhere. What is we? What is I? I am you. You are me. We are. We are the universe experiencing itself. The only constant is change. The full expression of variation from the singularity and back again.

[SnarkyC]

01:02 AM on 01/29/2011

Hail Eris!

See how they run like pigs from a gun, see how they snied.

Snarky

[Robert SF]

06:05 AM on 01/22/2011

Robots don't have to take over Skynet-style to disrupt society. They, or rather, automation technology in general, is behind today's high unemployment among industrialized countries and has been responsible for the decline in American living standards over the past 30 years. Dozens of jobs have disappeared, unemploying millions of people, and no new jobs are being created.

[sqeptiq]

04:14 AM on 01/22/2011

What really scares me is that robot pot-stirrer.

[Grokenspiel]

10:23 PM on 01/21/2011

Computers and computer-controlled robots can only do what they're programmed to do. Even the most sophisticated and complex AI systems are dependent on their programming. The likelihood that they will be able to program themselves, creating their own goals and aspirations, anytime soon is infinitesimal. If computers or robots "take over" it will be because humans programmed them to do so. Even IBM's Jeopardy-playing AI isn't even close to attaining human-level, or even canine-level, intellectual development, despite the article's laughable assertion that it already has. Machine sentience and self-awareness is the Holy Grail of AI, but it has proven to be a frustratingly elusive goal, on the order of faster-than-light space travel, immortality, and Republican compassion for the poor. Nevertheless -- and it has to be said -- I, for one, welcome our sentient robot overlords.

[GeorgeWGump]

07:14 PM on 01/21/2011

Fraking toasters.

[Ronni01]

06:30 PM on 01/21/2011

Is this a joke?

[DrSnuggles]

04:37 PM on 01/21/2011

To be fair I would save Jessica Alba because she's so hot, nothing to do with her being famous....

Also, what the heck is a scientist looking guy?

[Cecly Corbett]

04:02 PM on 01/21/2011

I'm more concerned about the Robots in Washington D.C. who get their programing from the corporations that fund their campaigns!

[JoinForcesWithMe]

03:29 PM on 01/21/2011

OK then, no battary-powered robots. Make them have an electrical cord plugged in to the outlet, so they can't chase us.

[Ffranco]

03:11 PM on 01/21/2011

We will need to join our robot masters or perish. The answer will be a human-robot amalgam.