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Unmarried Households Put Married Couples In The Minority

Unmarried Households

By NIGEL DUARA   05/28/11 07:23 PM ET   AP

PORTLAND, Ore. -- Three mornings a week, when Becky Leung gets ready for work, her boyfriend is just getting home from his overnight job. When her mother drops hints about her twin sister's marriage, she laughs it off. And when she thinks about getting married herself, she worries first about her career.

Leung, 27, cohabits in a Portland, Ore., townhome with her boyfriend but has no plans yet to wed, a reflection of the broader cultural shift in the U.S. away from the traditional definition of what it means to be a household.

Data released Thursday by the U.S. Census Bureau shows married couples have found themselves in a new position: They're no longer the majority.

It's a trend that's been creeping along for decades, but in the 2010 Census, married couples represent 48 percent of all households. That's down from 52 percent in the last Census and, for the first time in U.S. history, puts households led by married couples as a plurality.

"I see a lot of people not having the typical 8-to-5 job, or couples where one person is employed and one isn't. There's other priorities before marriage," Leung said.

The flip in the 2010 Census happened in 32 states. In another seven states, less than 51 percent of households were helmed by married couples.

The reason, said Portland State University demographer Charles Rynerson, is twofold: The fast-growing older population is more likely to be divorced or widowed later in life, and 20-somethings are putting off their nuptials for longer stretches.

"People in their 20s are postponing marriage for many reasons, including money," Rynerson said. "We also have an aging population, so there's more people living alone."

Fears of not being able to hang onto a job, a widening labor market for women and a shift away from having kids at a young age have all proved to be a disincentive for people in their 20s and early 30s to join the ranks of the married.

Leung is indicative of that trend. She's got a marketing job in a trendy city, writes a personal blog on living a gluten-free lifestyle and has plans to get married – eventually.

"I think a lot of people make a mistake of saying, I've got a good job, I'm stable, I'm ready to take the next step," Leung said. "You never know what happens down the road. That's the whole purpose of dating.

"You're not there to just have fun."

The median age for first marriages has climbed steadily since the 1960s, when men got married at about 23 years old, and women at 20. Now, men are waiting until they're 28 and women are holding off until 26.

"Some of that is people coupling but not being married," Rynerson said. "There are not nearly as many people in their 20s who are married as in previous generations."

The data supports that, as the Census Bureau reported last year that opposite-sex unmarried couples living together jumped 13 percent from 2009 to 7.5 million.

We're also living longer, with an average life expectancy of 78 years, nearly a decade longer than in the 1960s.

To reflect the changing attitudes on marriage, the Census Bureau has broadened the definition of family this year to include unmarried couples, such as same-sex partners, as well as foster children who are not related by blood or adoption.

And attitudes on marriage are changing, too. About 39 percent of Americans say marriage is becoming obsolete, according to a Pew Research Center study published in November, up from 28 percent in 1978.

Oregon is about average when it comes to the declining number of households led by married couples, and reflects the larger nationwide trend.

It's also a state that represents much of the ups and downs of the 2000s: There was population growth during the decade from Hispanics, a decline in the state's manufacturing sector and an economy in the central part of the state that was crushed by the crumbling housing market and Great Recession.

The state to buck the declining-marriage trend is Utah, where 61 percent of households are led by married couples. On the opposite side of the spectrum is Louisiana, which has the second-lowest percent of married people heading households. Louisiana State University sociologist Troy Blanchard said rural and urban poverty plays a major role.

"There's a lot of unmarried female householders, a lot of concentrated poverty where they don't have maybe the education or resources that allows for (marriage)," Blanchard said.

A decade ago, only six states and the District of Columbia were approaching the 2010 trend and had less than half of their households led by married couples. Data scheduled to be released later this year will included statistics for same-sex marriages.

Nationwide, Blanchard said, labor markets' gender disparities are beginning to equal out, allowing more women into professions that had been closed to them for decades and pushing down the number of households led by married couples. .

"We're far from stopping," Blanchard said. "Until we see that eradication of the gender barrier, I would anticipate (situations other than marriages) to get higher and higher."

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PORTLAND, Ore. -- Three mornings a week, when Becky Leung gets ready for work, her boyfriend is just getting home from his overnight job. When her mother drops hints about her twin sister's marriage, ...
PORTLAND, Ore. -- Three mornings a week, when Becky Leung gets ready for work, her boyfriend is just getting home from his overnight job. When her mother drops hints about her twin sister's marriage, ...
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Sherifah Rafiq Lobo
03:32 PM on 05/31/2011
Marriage is a contract. Like another contract, it ensures that all parties agree to certain terms and therefore reinforcing that commitment that both parties agree to. For example there are cell phone contracts and there are non-contract plans. The non-contract plan person can leave the company at anytime ( a new phone comes out or can get a better deal somewhere else). Whereas the contract cell agreement the person has to stay for at least two years of have to pay usually around $200. Likewise there are consequences upon breaking an marriage agreement vices a live-in playing house arrangement. Further in a live-in girlfriend allows the boyfriend to get all the benefits of a wife without a contract thus he can roll out without consequence (unless children or dual property ownership is involved). We have contracts for our homes, businesses, even cell phones... How much more should we ensure the union of family by securing a contract.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
honky1234
This is a karate dojo, not a knitting class
12:53 AM on 05/31/2011
"Unmarried households are now the majority."

And then elsewhere on HuffPo:

"Is Narcissism On The Rise In America?"
12:38 AM on 05/31/2011
The problem is, too many weak men think they are entitled to a partner. Well in nature is is a privilege not a right. In Bible days, rich and successful men were allowed to take more than one wife, thus the best genes were passed on more often. Maybe when this country is put right, it will be time to think about that again. Strong and successful men should have a greater opportunity to improve the species, while weak men should maybe practice celibasy until they grow stronger. We'd have more successful businessmen and less teachers, librarians and other eaters who just aren't fit for the real world.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Aboomer
03:06 PM on 05/31/2011
Cons-ZERO:

What?? Comments like yours are exactly the reason we need MORE librarians and MORE teachers.

Love,

Successful Lib Businesswoman
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
05:16 PM on 05/30/2011
There are many reasons that young adults are putting off getting married. 40 ,50, 60 years ago birth control was not as readily available, jobs were much more secure. My dad worked at his job for over 30 years and had a pension and so did my father in law. Now all the jobs are being shipped out and outsourced to cheap third world countries and the ones here no longer offer the benefits and security. Young people don't know where they'll be next year and once married with children they are locked in.
Also being the mother of two young men the young women they know want job security in their men and most want them very well off so they don't have to work.
01:08 AM on 05/31/2011
Everything you say used to be called "sin."
This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
08:47 AM on 05/31/2011
Wrong! there is nothing in my comment that is sinful!!!!!! I just stated facts , what that my dad and father inlaw had job security and a pension. What that young people now are scare to marry and start a family because there is no job security and might have to move????? What, that young women are look for men that can support them so they can stay home and raise their family?????
CONS = CON FUSED
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livedlong
haven't yet seen it all, but seen enough
04:37 PM on 05/30/2011
Lately there are many "marriage" articles. There is a lot of presumption by writers as well as readers about why marriages end. I recently ended a hellish 25 year union and I have to think my situation was not unique. To all those who say couples just quit when the going gets too rough, I say - really? You know this for fact and from firsthand experience? Unless you've lived it, it really outlandish to conclude you have the answers. You simply don't.

I tried everything I could think of to save my marriage, but I was the only one invested in it. I saw that someone posted a comment stating divorces are too easy to obtain and couples would try harder if divorcing were more difficult. Wrong - divorces are VERY hard - and expensive, not to mention they can drain years from your life. In my case, my spouse relied on this fact as an excuse to do exactly as he pleased, when he pleased, figuring I was stuck with him.

So please - all you know-it-all types - understand that you very likely don't know a thing.
01:05 PM on 05/30/2011
Its hard for people to think that they can be committed to anything for a whole lifetime... Maybe they don't believe anyone else is worth it??
12:58 PM on 05/30/2011
Big surprise. The vows only really mean something to a fraction of the folks who make them anyway so it makes sense that those who know off the bat that they're not ready / won't be ready for marriage, just avoid it. I can respect that.
12:57 PM on 05/30/2011
Bill Cosby: "Hurt people hurt people."
THe issue with marriage in America is that so many of us have witnessed bad marriages (our parents), who got bad marriage habits from their parents and so on and so forth. There is nothing wrong with the institution itself, it's that we now cannot function within it.
Read up: HAPPY marriage is one of the best things that can happen to someone, emotionally, financially, physically, healthwise, so on...
HAPPY marriage is just few and far between these days...
11:04 AM on 05/30/2011
Marriage like most relationships is hard. It is what you make of it. Not recognizing that there are times that you become annoyed with each other is short sighted.
Gay marriage isn't destroying marriage. Those who bail when it gets tough, choose infidelity or some other reason like "I'm bored" are destroying marriage.
10:51 AM on 05/30/2011
I guess I'm part of the super minority: Happily married husband.
09:15 AM on 05/30/2011
The percentage would rise if gay marriage was legal everywhere. Oops I forgot we would destroy the sanctity of marriage or have straight people already done that. How about
"one man, one woman ONE TIME. Maybe that will shut the right wingnuts up.
09:12 AM on 05/30/2011
The article shows there is a connection between women having more access to jobs and couples not getting married as much. Hmmmm. So now that women have more autonomy over their lives, they can finally ditch the sexist institution that marriage has been thoughout history. I know some people get married and they feel like it is all lovely and not sexist at all. That must be great for you if you are one of those people but honestly I think marriage is backwards. I still support gay marriage cause I think gay people should have the right to make their own choice. But my choice is NO WAY AM I GETTING MARRIED.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
blytzd
Your micro-bio is still empty.
09:49 AM on 05/30/2011
So gay marriage is ok but straight marriage is sexism in disguise??? I dont get your arguement but really I could care less about marriage either way.
10:10 AM on 05/30/2011
I personally oppose marriage but I don't oppose the right of anyone to marry, gay or straight. I think that marriage is steeped in a history of sexism, so it is very difficult to reinvent no matter who you are.
10:53 AM on 05/30/2011
Making a lifelong commitment is backwards? Sorry I think you are wrong to make such a broad generalization. Is it in some cases? Yes however not all. Don't throw me into your own personal hang-ups.
12:21 PM on 05/30/2011
I support anyone's choice to make a life long commitment. I think that marriage is difficult to reinvent, though some people manage to make it work for them despite it being steeped in institutionalized sexism.
07:59 AM on 05/30/2011
People have become too selfish to make their marriages work. And there are now more temptations, both real and imaginary, for straying.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Elyriaohio
Stop the Monarchy
06:54 AM on 05/30/2011
Less marriages, less children. What do you expect when you're killing-off the middle-class?
The simplest dreams of a job, home, retirement have become unreachable or an act of luck.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Sol76
07:37 AM on 05/30/2011
Poor people generally don't let lack of income stop them from breeding one baby after another. Do you think most of the teen pregnancies are by educated middle class people with jobs?
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
blytzd
Your micro-bio is still empty.
09:50 AM on 05/30/2011
No becasue teens arent educated middle class with jobs, perhaps there parents are though.
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Elyriaohio
Stop the Monarchy
05:44 AM on 05/31/2011
Your cliches have nothing to do with my point.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Sol76
06:36 AM on 05/30/2011
This is the golden age of narcism. People are not getting married because they see it as an obstacle to personal gain and gratification. Also with the glorification of single mothers in the media and the acceptance of homosexuality those groups no longer feel obliged to get married.
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
jhr459
Arbiter of All Things
08:20 AM on 05/30/2011
OK, I know you are a Super User (even tho I have no idea what that means) but I don't understand your post. When you say 'those groups no longer feel obliged to get married', to what groups are you referring ?
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HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Sol76
08:34 AM on 05/30/2011
Groups of women who had unplanned pregnancies and gay men who needed a cover. In the past it was shameful for a woman to fall pregnant and not be married. As for homosexuality it used to be taboo. To stop people from pointing fingers, people in those situations got married in order to look normal. For examples look at every loveless marriage that ends when the children move out and every Republican in a gay scandal. Because social norms have changed, people like that are less likely to feel obliged to marry today and in the process this contributed to the marriage rate falling.