Missing Monkey Doll In Park Slope: Manhattan Couple Offers $500 Reward For Safe Return
A Manhattan couple, who is not romantically involved, lost their beloved son--who is actually a stuffed animal doll named Bongo--during a night out in Park Slope Sunday, and is offering up a nice reward to anyone who will return the missing monkey.
Still following? Okay.
Fucked In Park Slope blogger Kerri Doherty spotted posters across the Brooklyn neighborhood this week, offering up $500 for the safe return of the little eight-inch tall, brown beanie-baby.
“It happened so fast, because I couldn’t have been in the restaurant 10 minutes before I realized he was gone,” Zinzi told the Paper. “Somebody must have come along and thought he was as cute as I know he is.”
According to Marcus and Zinzi, who say they are not dating, Bongo has been "the son they never had" for 10 years, accompanying Marcus to a "Hindu hermitage in the Bahamas" and tagging along while Zinzi played handball in Coney Island.
The prodigal primate has yet to be returned, although at least two good samaritans have called in Bongo sightings--one on Flatbush Avenue and the other on Union St. and 8th Ave.
It's still a little unclear how Park Slopers are reacting to the strange story.
Will they indulge Marcus and Zinzi a la Lars and The Real Girl?
Or, will they respond like Tyrone Williams, who works at a Slope supermarket and told the Paper, "What's the big deal?! Get another teddy bear!"
Also! This isn't the first time we've heard of a couple raising a doll as if it were a real live thing. The Daily recently reported the story of an old couple that had raised a doll as their son for twenty years.
So what do you think New York? In Kerri Doherty's words: "Sweet and sad, or just fucking weird?"