Should You Give Condoms To Your Teen? From Dr. Drew

A conflicted mother asks sex and addiction expert Dr. Drew whether or not she should supply condoms to her sexually active teenager. Watch the video to see what Dr. Drew says!

What would you do? Do you think access to condoms helps or hurts the situation? Join the conversation – post a comment below!

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Comments

[BigWillyG]

11:52 PM on 08/31/2011

I wouldn't because it's better they learn where to find them themselves and get over any awkwardness about buying them since that's an important skill to learn. Driving them to do their own shopping for those I'll totally do though.

[sebraunlin]

11:06 PM on 08/18/2011

By all means yes. With your own messages about values: such as honesty, respect, reciprocity, consent, equal power basis, mutual pleasure. Remove obstacles to contraceptive access.

[Sabrina Horn]

10:32 PM on 08/16/2011

i agree.if my kids were sexually active than i would provide condoms. i wouldnt be happy about it but its not like i can tie em down and say no.

[kathleens]

03:42 PM on 08/16/2011

Questions: What's worse than teen sex?

Answer: Teen pregnancy.

It's foolish not to supply a sexually active teen with birth control. (And let's not forget, condoms prevent AIDS and other STD's, too.)

[mrsL]

07:19 AM on 09/29/2011

When do these kids have time to be sexually active? Between school, work, extra curriculars and homework when do these kids have that kind of time and opportunity?

[Ayla87]

03:21 PM on 08/16/2011

I'll let them know where to purchase condoms, and I won't freak out if I find one or two in their room. But I'm not buying it for them. They want to screw around that bad they can use their own money to pay for protection.

I'll also make it clear at a young age: Any child of mine who gets (a girl) pregnant before they finish high school has two options. Give the child up for adoption or get the hell out of my house. Sorry kids, but if you want to play adult games prepare to face the adult consequences.

[Karissa36]

12:52 PM on 09/12/2011

These "options" fail to take into account that children have two parents.

While you may be able to kick your own daughter out for having an abortion, (although you may find the law still requires you to support her until age 18), you have no control over the choices of another girl your son may get pregnant. Neither does he.

Further, what if your son or daughter agreed to give the child up for adoption, but the other teen parent does not? Would you expect your daughter to hand your grandchild over to a 17 year old father, and just walk away? Would she even be able to? As far as I know, a parent can't walk away from child support obligations by simply stating he/she wishes to give the child up for adoption, when the other parent does not agree.

[Ayla87]

04:07 PM on 09/13/2011

That's their problem. Not mine. If both teens are so eager to raise this child on their own they're welcome to do so; Either in their own apartment or at the other grandparents house.

Don't get me wrong, I'm have no plans on abandoning my grand child. The moment that child is born and/or paternity is established, I'm transferring every dime from my kids college fund/ inheritance over to the baby. And I'll be an active part of the child's life. But the parents are on their own. They can get a job, join the military, learn a trade... whatever it takes for them to deal with the consequences of their own actions.

[iridium53]

02:00 PM on 08/16/2011

You bet you should make condoms available.
It's a question of dangerous unprotected sex vs. some fantasy that they may not have sex.

We set this conversation up years in advance with open discussion of sex.
When we finally had the conversation we made it clear that there are many reasons to not have sex too soon - emotional, etc.
And, that we were worried about our kids for that reason.
But, that we would provide condoms to keep them safe.

We even discussed this with the parents of our kid's friends - to let them know what we were doing.

A tip that helped us.
We had annual (around their birthday) discussion of the "house" rules, responsibilities and remedies. Starting at around 10.
It gave us (wife and I) an opportunity to get on the same page about punishments.
It gave us a stimulus to think through things in advance.
And, it gave us an annual opportunity to discuss expectations, rules, responsibilities, discipline from results, explanations, etc.

[Jjelizabeth]

05:27 AM on 08/13/2011

My parents started getting me condoms when I was 14, but had always been open to sex. I learned about it from a younger age than most children, but I also had a knack for understanding things better than most children. They told me they didn't care when I did it, so long as I talked to them about it before hand, and that it was done under their roof. A few weeks before my 17th birthday, I told my mom I wanted to have sex with my boyfriend of 3 years. It wasn't the first time it came up, but this time I was serious. I think that, because my parents were open, and provided me with the protection I needed to have an intimate relationship with my high school sweetheart, I was probably a lot better off than most teens, who wind up having sex and getting pregnant at 14, because their parents preached abstinance rather than safety.

[kayisdelirious]

04:12 PM on 08/11/2011

It's easier to use a condom when you have one.

[dekethortonsarmy]

12:59 AM on 08/13/2011

sage advise.....what a joke

[April Pells]

04:05 PM on 08/11/2011

You can't put a boot on your kid's junk. They are going to do whatever they want to explore themselves and their sexuality. Teach them to be responsible.

[nohopepope2187]

03:52 PM on 08/11/2011

It's either condoms or a chastity belt. Take your pick...

[Nancy Audet]

01:33 PM on 08/11/2011

Yes, absolutely. When my kids were teens, I always had a bowl of condoms in a cupboard where they and their friends had access. I believe it sent the message -- I love you and want you to be safe and healthy.

[dekethortonsarmy]

12:59 AM on 08/13/2011

a bowl of condoms in the cupboard for your kids and their friends????

what happened to Lucky Charms

"I love you and want you to be safe and healthy." Are you serious?

all you are telling them to wear a rubber before getting it on

Sick

[tiredofpc]

01:13 AM on 08/13/2011

Not sick; sensible. Time has proven that kids do what kids do and I'd rather have a child safe from disease and unwanted pregnancy. Taking responsibility for their own behavior is so much smarter than the alternative, and if a bowl of condoms in the cupboard encourages that, good for that mom!

[Valerie Keefe]

01:08 PM on 08/11/2011

I don't need to see the video. Yes.