iPhone app iPad app Android phone app Android tablet app

Teen Slang: Why The Word 'Rape' Should Never Be Used Casually

  First Posted: 01/09/12 11:38 AM ET Updated: 01/09/12 12:55 PM ET

This is a teen-written article from The Communicator, the student-run print and online newspaper of Community High School in Ann Arbor, Michigan.

Words, like most other teenage cultural expressions, go in and out of fashion. And though certain phrases we use on a daily basis can leave older generations perplexed, they are often harmless and insignificant. However, the increasing use of the weighted word “rape” as a casual slang term threatens to do much more than raise a few parental eyebrows.

The word “rape” is generally used by high school students either negatively, to represent mental or physical injury or damage, (“Wow, that math test totally raped me.”) or positively, to represent beating, winning, or acing something. (“Oh yeah, I just raped that math test.”).

The use of “rape” in such a casual way misrepresents the gravity of sexual assault. Rape is no laughing matter. In the United States, approximately 16 percent of women and three percent of men have been victims of attempted or completed rape. Fifteen percent of sexual assault victims are under 12. Sexual assault victims are three times more likely to suffer from depression and four times more likely to contemplate suicide than non-victims.

Therefore, the use of rape as a positive term is confusing and worrying. How can committing an act of rape be equated to winning or doing something well? There is nothing glamorous about rape, and nothing “cool” about committing sexual assault. The negative use of the word ”rape” is not much better. Losing a sports game or doing badly on a test is nowhere near comparable to being a victim of rape. Imagine how a victim of sexual assault would feel hearing the word thrown around so casually.

Sure, rape is not the only word used in this context. “Kill” has often been used in exactly the same way, and complaints about it are few and far between. The use of murder in this context, however, is not as problematic as that of rape. The two words, while perhaps interchangeable in a sentence, are different entities with different histories.

For the last several centuries, murder has been universally accepted as the horrible crime that it is. When a murder is reported, it is always investigated and taken seriously. Even young children know and understand that killing is wrong.

Rape, however, still has a long way to go in terms of awareness, understanding, and prosecution. Almost all rapists (94 percent) do not spend even a day in jail. On average for the past five years, 60 percent of sexual assaults are not reported to the police. Even when a rape is reported, there is only a 50.8 percent chance of an arrest being made, and 31 percent of those convicted of a felony for rape will not spend time in jail.

In addition, rape prevention efforts and the recognition of marital rape as a crime did not come about until fairly recently, contrary to what one might assume. The first legally incorporated rape crisis center was not established until 1972. Every U.S. state had a marital rape exemption law, which stated that a husband raping his wife was not a crime, until 1975, when South Dakota became the first to remove it. The last state to remove this exemption, North Carolina, did not do so until 1992. Many countries today still do not view rape within marriage as a crime.

In just four decades, the United States has come a long way in terms of assistance for rape victims, education about rape, and prosecution of rapists. But there is still a long way to go in both our own country and others. We need to start by treating rape as the serious issue that it is. How can students in our generation understand the damage and severity of rape when it is thrown around in every other sentence? How can the 60 percent of sexual assault victims who do not report the crime to the police find the courage to do so when “rape” is used jokingly and treated as “nothing”?

I know that the students who use the word “rape” in a casual way usually do not mean anything by it. They do not condone rape or think that it is a good thing. I know that there have been times I’ve used the word more lightly that I should have. But in this case, intention doesn’t count. Even if you don’t think rape is insignificant or funny, using it as a slang term sends the message that you do.

There is nothing funny, glamorous, or casual about rape. Committing an act of rape does not make you cool, powerful, or superior. As high schoolers, we should know this. So why can’t our vocabulary reflect that knowledge?

More stories from The Communicator:

FOLLOW HUFFPOST HIGH SCHOOL

 
 
  • Comments
  • 111
  • Pending Comments
  • 0
  • View FAQ
Post Comment Preview Comment
To reply to a Comment: Click "Reply" at the bottom of the comment; after being approved your comment will appear directly underneath the comment you replied to.
View All
Favorites
Recency  | 
Popularity
Page: 1 2 3  Next ›  Last »  (3 total)
05:40 PM on 01/20/2012
(continuation of my last comment) Imagine hearing the same word used in conversation at the lunch table and by people talking in class before the bell rings and by your friends and in passing bits of conversation every time you walk in the halls and every time it triggers the same emotions and brings the horrible memories right to the front of your mind. And you never become immune to it. It just gets worse every time. How would you feel by the end of day? How would it affect your overall mood and your performance in school?

And there are so many other words that could have been used to convey exactly the same thing. To anyone who read this article and decided not to change the way they talk: Why not use other words instead of rape? It's absolutely unnecessary to use rape in conversation when there are a million other things you could say to say exactly the same thing.
05:39 PM on 01/20/2012
I am a victim of rape, and I'm in high school and hear people use the word casually every single day multiple times. Every time someone uses the word rape, even if it's not intended as anything more than just a casual phrase, it brings back memories and I automatically feel nervous and upset. And 16% of women feel the same way. To anyone after reading this article who decides that they won't change the way that they talk, consider something simple. Why is it so difficult to just use other words? What could you possibly be gaining from using the word rape over a different word? What's the point?

And it's not a matter of pretending that a word has only one meaning. I feel upset and distressed even if I hear the word rape being used in a normal context. But hearing the word rape spontaneously used in a school environment all throughout my day is quite literally traumatizing. It gets to the point where I feel even more upset every time I hear it, and I want to leave school. Imagine walking through the halls between classes, thinking about a math test you just took or where you need to get to before the bell rings, and just out of nowhere you hear a word that triggers horrible emotions and memories.
04:44 AM on 01/10/2012
I had to shorten my argument quite a bit because of length restrictions.

The longer version of my argument is this. There are some places and some situations where some words are appropriate, and others are not. However, I am not going to change the way I talk in my every day life because I might mention the word rape around a rape victim, or around someone who could be offended by it. That being said, many people take the word for face value, and not the context your using it in. If the word is taken for face value, then its at the fault of the listener, not the one who said the word. When I say get raped to a friend, I mean get owned. I'm not telling my friend to get dragged down an ally and actually get raped. The people that see the word raped used, and automatically jump on the person who said it are the ones that you should never ever take seriously, because they can ONLY take things at face value.

And to reiterate my core argument, there's a time and a place for specific words. I'm not going to walk up to a rape victim and use the phrase "get raped". I'm not going to walk around every day random people I meet and tell them to get raped. However, if i'm with my friends and I use it around someone who may get offended, then they are the one at fault.
04:58 PM on 01/10/2012
"And to reiterate my core argument, there's a time and a place for specific words. I'm not going to walk up to a rape victim and use the phrase "get raped".

Given that 1 in every 6 women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape, you may be doing exactly that and not know it. There's no time and place for "fun" uses of the phrase.
02:00 PM on 01/11/2012
you are speaking from a position of extreme privilege- it is a luxury to be able to take words at face value without context. rape survivors and assault survivors were forced into a situation where we lost the luxury of attaching a context to these words, and many of us do not appreciate being essentially told to rise above it or get over it- if you think it's that easy, you've got another think coming. examine your privilege.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Frank Lee Mydear
04:09 AM on 01/10/2012
I have noticed that some teens I know have started using the word in a casual way. What surprises me now is when I see old movies from the late 70's where the word was thrown about casually regarding sex--usually the lonely ugly duckling character wishing for it. It was a common misconception that Rape was about sex and was not the brutal attack that it is. Only in the 80's when the feminist movement pushed this understanding about Rape did the casual use of the word disappear.
03:48 AM on 01/10/2012
This is the norm. Each generation of kids express themselves in ways that leave their elders muttering and grumbling.
04:59 AM on 01/10/2012
This is true. I also like to think there is a time and a place for specific words. I would never walk up to my grandma and tell her to get raped, because its horribly disrespectful. However, I will walk around my friends and use it just like any other word.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
squirrely girl
Assistant Professor ~ Developmental Psychology
02:31 PM on 01/11/2012
True... but there are absolutely terms and phrases that are dropped from the vernacular because they are offensive and our understanding changes over time. Words related to race and ethnicity are a great example.
02:50 AM on 01/10/2012
if these numbers are correct(94%no jail,60%no reporting etc.) rape has for sure a long way to go.still-after researching it on the net-rape is mostly everywhere considered a serious crime.if convicted:high jailtime,deathpenalty,loss of job,problems finding new one because of record,stigma.sometimes chemical castration if accepted lowers jailtime.
most of the time it's hard to go through the process for victims especially if booze,pills,drugs are involved and proof that it really was rape is hard to come by with. but again these numbers are reason to be very concerned.
12:32 PM on 01/12/2012
But conviction is incredibly difficult; most often the victim won't come forward out of the fear that it's her fault she was assaulted or the fear that she won't be believed. That's rape culture. Most rapists are never convicted and never see jail time, and it's not because they didn't commit the crime.
08:26 PM on 01/19/2012
looks like my reply days ago never made it-so i try again.
i guess you're right-not that i want it to.there are some very good organisations out there who try to help the victims.this fear is exactly what has to be overcome-even if it's a hard thing to do- otherwise it won't get better and the abuse continues.
12:24 AM on 01/10/2012
I hear this alot and it pisses me off to no end. Those people have no idea how horrible rape is and its not something to joke about its not even funny. Odds are if that ever happened to them they would not be joking about it..
12:10 AM on 01/10/2012
Just another example of people not understanding the English language. Not to mention the fact that any derogatory phrase has no meaning until it is directed at them. Then there seems to be a problem with that particular word. Empathy is lacking in American society and yet no one seems to be taking it seriously.
03:45 AM on 01/10/2012
Apathy towards the lack of empathy
11:47 PM on 01/09/2012
So, in short, the author dislikes the use of the word "rape" in contexts other than sexual assault and tries to convince us that it's bad for us to use it because rape hasn't been thoroughly condemned around the world. Is that it?

That's a pretty weak argument. That some people have been horrendously traumatized and injured during rapes does not in any way relate the slang usage of the word in the same way that "kill," "cool," "owned," etc don't relate to the common usage of the words when used colloquially.
12:06 AM on 01/10/2012
Straw man. Read the article.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Agent Cooper
04:00 PM on 01/11/2012
Rape is always referring to sexual assault. That's what it means.
11:46 PM on 01/09/2012
On Thanksgiving I was out walking around with my 13 year old niece, her 11 year old friend and our 6 year old cousin. The whole time my niece and her friend joked about a black man would come out of the shadows and raping us. I stopped walking and told them that rape is NEVER something to joke about. It's a horrible thing. I told them how I know 3 women who have been raped and how one tried to kill herself because of it. All they did was stare at me like I was insane and when we started to walk again they started joking about it again. They didn’t care that there was a 6 year old with us, whose mom is a rape victim. I ended out walk right then and there. I can’t stand people who joke about rape.
12:26 AM on 01/10/2012
That's good you spoke up. But what was with the 'black thing'? just wondering where they got that from, that's a pretty strong negative view already for young girls.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
squirrely girl
Assistant Professor ~ Developmental Psychology
02:32 PM on 01/11/2012
Probably from the rape myth that it's a scary ethnic minority man in the bushes or parking lot that does the raping...
04:48 AM on 01/10/2012
I joke about rape all the time. I tell my friends to get raped. The context in which the child used the word rape was incorrect, and should not have been said. However, I can't stand people that have tunnel vision and pretend like words only have one meaning.
06:24 PM on 01/20/2012
you clearly have never had any experience of such a vile crime or you wouldn't feel the need to give the word a new meaning. It does have only have meaning you can use it in a different context all you like but that will never erases from anyones mind its original connotations. Someone close to me has been raped and my friends were joking about rape I was aware they meant no harm and the didnt understand the severity of it but that didnt stopped me feeling upset, I didn't tell them not to use the word I simply started telling them the statistics and they soon realised they were out of line.
Learical
Maintain!
11:39 PM on 01/09/2012
Also, it has happened to me twice; both times from a break-in. Though they were each done for different reasons, both offenders ended up in jail. One died there. I understand the emotions most victims carry with them. I just didn't fight, and came away unharmed from one of them. However, it just doesn't do anyone any good to hold onto what happened. I had a son to protect, then a daughter and a son to protect, and that's what I did. That was much more important than a power play by some jerk. I focus on the positives and laugh at the idiots who thought they won something. I hopes this helps someone, somewhere.
12:27 AM on 01/10/2012
Thank you for sharing that :)
04:49 AM on 01/10/2012
Thank you for sharing that. Holding onto the past, especially something that made a severe impact on your life and be hurtful to you and others.
11:23 PM on 01/09/2012
It is very sad that slang has sank to such a low. It is even sadder that so many do not find it disturbing.
Learical
Maintain!
11:23 PM on 01/09/2012
Well done.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Alexandra Spinner
Cutting edge with no band-aid
11:09 PM on 01/09/2012
What a tremendous stand-up youth! Enlightens us to a graphic word currently being used as slang and then BACKS the story up with objective yet emotional facts that scaled beyond just personal opinion. Informed us, questioned us and then asks of themselves and us "why can't our vocabulary reflect our knowledge?"
04:52 AM on 01/10/2012
Our vocabulary does reflect our knowledge. When we tell someone to get raped, we generally have no foul intentions twords the person were telling it to. The people, like you, who take the word out of the context that it was used should open your eyes a little more.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Alexandra Spinner
Cutting edge with no band-aid
08:45 AM on 01/10/2012
People like me? People like me. The word ONLY mean what it MEANS. I am a wide eyed, wide open highly educated liberal who know where words and their intentions belong in a sentence including its intended use.

Rape is meant as a sexual act of rage inflicted act against and upon another individual.

Open a dictionary. And open your mind.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Alexandra Spinner
Cutting edge with no band-aid
03:43 PM on 01/10/2012
Your comment wasn't posted. However I did read it.

Good thing we have a 1st amendment. And in your case though I don't regard censorship practices as all American, in the case of your comments, wisdom prevails from the online editors here at HuffPo. Thank you HuffPo.
11:08 PM on 01/09/2012
hey heres an idea....how bout we all teach our children respect for others and to treat others with respect like i was taught as a child and as everyone supposedly wants their children to act.If more parents were involved in their childrens lives instead of sitting watching t.v. and actually spending time with thier kids maybe "rape" and some of the other problems kids are going through wouldnt be happening as much as they are nowadays!
Ok computer junkies...start slamming my comment im ready for ya!!
04:55 AM on 01/10/2012
Comment slamming begins now!

First your grammar is really bad. I know mine isn't perfect, but before you teach any child anything, you should head back to school.

My parents were very involved in my life, through every step of my life. I use the phrase get raped often, every night. You look at the word out of the context that I used it in, that shows the fault of the listener, not the fault of the person that said it.

And computer junkies like me have a more powerful computer then you have car, and you have to rely on us to fix yours when it breaks, so I suggest you be a little nicer.