Eli Escalera, Alleged Bank Robber, Attempts Hold-Up Wearing Shorts On His Head: Police

Sure, this alleged bank robber puts his pants on one leg at a time just like the rest of us -- but then he wears shorts on his head.

The Monroe County Sheriff's Office in Florida says 43-year-old Eli Escalera tried to rob a bank in Stock Island, Fla., with a pair of shorts on his noggin.

According to a Sheriff's department press release, Escalera gave the bank teller a note that said "give me what are 20s and 50s."

"What do you want?" the teller then asked, perhaps confused by the phrasing of Escalera's note, if not the shorts on his head.

Escalera then said "never mind" and walked out of the bank, according to the Sheriff's department.

Puzzlingly, the release says police were told to look for "a Hispanic male wearing a blue shirt, dark colored cargo pants, with scars on his face." But, we have to wonder, why not also look for a man wearing pants on his head?

Nevertheless, the description was enough to lead police to Escalera, who was seen taking off a pair of dark-colored pants, according to the release. Escalera was then arrested and charged with robbery.

But the Miami New Times points out that there's still one nagging loose end that begs to be tied up.

"Left unanswered, though, is the key question of why Escalera wore shorts in lieu of a baseball cap," the New Times wrote. "Did he think the shorts covered his face?"

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Comments

[Rainsgirl]

01:57 PM on 02/08/2012

What does him wearing pants on his head have anything to do with him robbing a bank? He obviously has deeper issues.

[boba7576]

03:38 PM on 02/07/2012

Thats the "skidmark bandit " .

[GlassMask]

02:09 PM on 02/07/2012

What, no mention of the enormous sweater puppies? Surely that was the most important part of the disguise, designed to distract tellers from his face...

[acarioti]

10:17 AM on 02/07/2012

I love Florida!

[caramelosdos]

09:44 AM on 02/07/2012

Wouldn't that be ATTEMPTED robbery?

[dwuzze]

09:37 AM on 02/07/2012

I'm sure putting shorts on HIS head left a skid mark.

[Davedawg]

09:20 AM on 02/07/2012

You will never get respect while robbing a bank without starch in your shorts, silly goose

[c1n9r6v3]

09:16 AM on 02/07/2012

_Note reads: "give me what are 20s and 50s."
Teller takes a 20 Dollar note and a 50 Dollar note...goes to the photocopy / photostat machine...prints out a stack of twenties and fifties...and hands them over. `
Teller has given "what are 20s and 50s", indeed. ` ☺_

[ennui the third]

08:51 AM on 02/07/2012

Whew!....I could have sworn it was lady gaga!

[mmrdaisley]

07:21 AM on 02/07/2012

Face looks like a man but the breast threw me off ???? pre-op?

[whoknew222]

06:47 AM on 02/07/2012

Just another example of the need for better literacy in this country. "Give me what are 20s and 50s. Say what? Even the teller didn't understand.
There's only one thing someone wants when they're robbing a bank. $$$$$

[ccsysglf]

06:16 AM on 02/07/2012

damn, i didn't even recognize him. or could it be i never knew him anyway...

[ddokken69]

02:46 AM on 02/07/2012

Didn't he watch the spongebob episode?? It didn't work there either!!

[MINDGAMES 2011]

02:29 AM on 02/07/2012

That's a women,or did some of you miss the second entry.

[whoknew222]

05:42 AM on 02/07/2012

The article says he. "Sure, this alleged bank robber puts his pants on one leg at a time just like the rest of us -- but then he wears shorts on his head.", though I must agree, if he'd disguised himslf as a woman he may have gotten away. I thought it was a woman when I first saw the picture too.
I'm not sure what you mean by second entry but the picture under the article is a different peson. She robbed a bank because she needed dentures.
I hope I never get that desperate.

[ginocat55]

01:25 AM on 02/07/2012

and fake boobs too??? seeeeeexyyyyyy !!!!!