More

HuffPost Social Reading

5 Healthy Reasons To Love Love

Lasting Relationship Feelings

The Huffington Post   Posted: 02/14/2012 7:42 am

Valentine's Day may get a bad rap as a greeting card holiday, but at the heart of it (no pun intended), it's an opportunity for us to be reminded of the loving relationships in our lives, which have a real and lasting impact on our health and well-being.

Factors like having a supportive community as you grow up, a secure job that you can rely on, or family that you see regularly make a big difference in determining both the quality and the quantity of your years, said Dr. Dean Ornish, M.D., author and HuffPost's medical editor. In other words, love makes you happier, but also healthier and long-living. However, maintaining these sorts of close relationships often goes unrecognized as a health behavior, he said.

"I believe that the need for love and connection and community is a fundamental thing ... as basic of a need as food, air and water," Ornish told HuffPost.

Conversely, people who feel lonely, depressed and isolated are more likely to get sick and die prematurely than those who have a strong sense of connection, community, and love in their lives, he added.

Ornish wrote in his 2008 book "The Spectrum: A Scientifically Proven Program to Feel Better, Live Longer, Lose Weight, and Gain Health":

A fully committed relationship allows both people to feel complete trust in each other. Trust allows us to feel safe. When we feel safe, we can open our heart to the other person and be completely naked and vulnerable to them -- physically, emotionally and spiritually. When our hearts are fully open and vulnerable, we can experience profound levels of intimacy that are healing, joyful, powerful, creative and intensely ecstatic. We can surrender to each other out of strength and wisdom, not out of fear, weakness and submission.

But don't just take his word for it. Here is some of the latest research on the key factors for a lasting relationship, and the healthy benefits of love:

In-Sync Feelings Are Key
1  of  7
PLAY
FULLSCREEN
ZOOM
SHARE THIS SLIDE 
A new study from University of California, Davis researchers suggests a main factor in a lasting relationship is having feelings that are consistently "in-sync" with your honey over time.

"We found that the longer periods of stability for the couple were great predictors of staying together," study researcher Emilio Ferrer, a psychology professor at UC Davis, said in a statement.

To test this, researchers had 131 couples -- married and unmarried, of all ages -- answer questionnaires every day for 60 to 90 days. The participants had to record their emotions, both positive -- "trusted," free," "physically intimate" -- and negative -- "lonely," "angry," "deceived."

Researchers then followed up a year after the questionnaires were answered to see which couples were still together. They ground that 72 of them were still together.

The researchers found that the bigger the differences in the couples' emotions as indicated in the questionnaires, the more likely they were to break up.

"If they move around on the chart and are not consistent, they were more likely to break up," Ferrer said in the statement.

This held true even for couples whose times of unhappiness were followed up by times of happiness, researchers found. Their work will be published in the journal Multivariate Behavioral Research this month.

FOLLOW HUFFPOST HEALTHY LIVING

Valentine's Day may get a bad rap as a greeting card holiday, but at the heart of it (no pun intended), it's an opportunity for us to be reminded of the loving relationships in our lives, which have a...
Valentine's Day may get a bad rap as a greeting card holiday, but at the heart of it (no pun intended), it's an opportunity for us to be reminded of the loving relationships in our lives, which have a...
 
 
  • Comments
  • 4
  • Pending Comments
  • 0
  • View FAQ
Post Comment Preview Comment
To reply to a Comment: Click "Reply" at the bottom of the comment; after being approved your comment will appear directly underneath the comment you replied to.
View All
Recency  | 
Popularity
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
flyinghigh0905
01:00 PM on 02/15/2012
I have certainly been happier since entering into a functional, happy relationship. We have our occasional annoyances with each other, but they don't last long, and his attitude is just to let things go, which has a positive influence on me. I have depression, and of course, having a man who loves me for me helps pull me out of that whole. So I agree with pretty much everything on here.

One of the suggestions is having close ties with friends and family and such in order for the relationship to also last a long time. This seems plausible, since I have known some couples who shut themselves away from everyone tend to have those on again- off again relationships.
02:14 AM on 02/15/2012
I love the free sample site "Get Official Samples" search online to find their official website, that's where i get most of my samples from!!! yay i love free stuff.
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
Yvonne Serocki
wellness is inspired
07:38 PM on 02/14/2012
The most little known reason: fruit! www.newheavenonearth.wordpress.com
photo
HUFFPOST SUPER USER
madcityy
03:33 PM on 02/14/2012
I DOOO LOVE LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE