TEEN POETRY: 'You Go On Ahead For Now'

This is a regular column featuring original poetry by and for high school students, provided by Figment.com, an online community writing site for young people.

"You go on ahead for now,"

I shout to all my friends,

in a confidently stable voice

I know is just pretend.

I carefully suppress the tremors,

the shaking of my voice.

After all, it's my own fault.

I made choice after choice.

I listen to their fading laughter

and reminiscent stories,

I've no mem'ries of my own, but

for this I'm not sorry.

Don't misinterpret what I say,

I wish I'd what they do.

Unfort'nately, three years seems not

enough to become new.

The joyful exclamation of

a hope fin'lly come true,

leaves me with only jealousy

cast in a greenish hue.

"I'm into college!" they proclaim.

"2 out of 3 so far."

With each I see, I'm led to think

of myself as sub-par.

Not sure why I did not apply

to school much earlier.

Maybe scared or fearful,

maybe hypnotized by it's allure.

Depressing as it is,

I try to think positively:

The great thing about life is that

whatever happens--good or bad--

my fate's not something that I had.

Now and tomorrow: it's up to me.

Yesterday went not so well, my

choices poor to say the least.

Steps in wrong directions, many,

for" life critics" it'd be a feast.

I've made ev'ry mistake that any

man should have to make.

Regret is binding, ever finding;

can't hide nor back decisions take.

A quote I sometimes read and in which

I can take solace,

"The future comes one day at a time."

The power in it, hit or miss.

a puzzled look upon her face,

likely lives a life in which

the future she's keen to embrace.

A family stable, grades secure,

and five year plan in place,

this quote makes little sense to her

in reference to time and space.

But I, oh yes, I feel the weight

of what the future brings.

Uncertainty of school or job

and countless other things.

its statement of the obvious,

a fact that is forgotten by

far too large a number of us.

We people with anxiety and

fear for what's to come,

Who squirm and worry, stress and scurry,

need reminder that we're fine and, though today is almost done,

the battle we've not lost or won.

The best thing 'bout the future's that

the days come one by one.

Don't get ahead or overstress:

the battle we've not lost or won.

Not with the setting of the sun,

not with departure of a ton

of high school friends to college fun.

The battle we've not lost or won.

In fact, it's really just begun.