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Who Wore It Better: 'The Avengers' Edition (PHOTOS)

Posted: 05/04/2012 1:32 pm Updated: 05/04/2012 1:33 pm

Well, here we are. "The Avengers" has finally made it to theaters and our collective nerd hearts are about to explode... just, hopefully, not all over our homemade Avengers costumes.

Like all superheroes, "The Avengers" have plenty of imitators (perhaps there's one in line with you at the movie right now). But can anyone really compare to the original?

We consulted the self-appointed style experts at HuffPost Comedy (Carol, Katla, Ross, Christine & special guest Mike) and asked them to compare these Hollywood-designed superheroes to their slightly more pedestrian counterparts.

Check out everyone's assessments to the right of the photos.

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  • Captain America

    <strong>Katla</strong>: If the beard/hair sticking out of the costume on the right doesn't steal the show, I don't know what does.<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> Dude on the right has a better body, and Chris Evans is definitely not getting into the after-party without a laminate. Dumb ass.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> Leaving the house in a Captain America outfit without a shield is like leaving the house for the Oscars without the net worth of a small country dangling from your ears. Accessories, people. This isn't rocket science.<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> In fairness, the gentleman on the right may be a more accurate representation of today's America that the good Captain has vowed to protect.<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> Guy on the right wins for having a badge. Lord knows I love a dude who can get me into VIP.<br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> Guy on the right.

  • Nick Fury

    <strong>Katla</strong>: In the words of Samuel L. Jackson, "Just 'cause you pour syrup on something doesn't make it pancakes!"<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> If the guy with the plastic gun were any less scary, I would use him to put my baby nephew to sleep.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> One of these guns shoots flames. Why is this even a question?<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> The thing that's most astounding about this photo is that it's not a composite. Samuel L. Jackson has just about had <em>enough</em> of guys who look like Keegan-Michael Key and put that much effort into framing a photo of themselves shooting a toy gun.<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> Sammy Jackson wins here because it looks like his boots can handle whatever dystopic moonscape he's crouching in. Function before form.<br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> Samuel L. Jackson, natch.

  • Iron Man

    <strong>Katla</strong>: The one on the right wins, if only for the mask/hair combo. Business in the front, party in the back.<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> This kid's parents need to learn the difference between child and adult mask sizes. Plus his eyes don't glow, which is sad.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> Look, I'll just come out and say it, "Safety is the best accessory." The kid wins.<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> Tony Stark's mechanical shell complicates his own hubris and alcoholism, and the kid's plastic mask just stops him from drinking too much Capri Sun before naptime. Iron Boy wins, for his innocence.<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> If I learned one thing from teen angst poetry, it's that we all need to take off our "masks" and "facades" and "be our true selves." Everyone loses. Next.<br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> Anyone who buckles up.

  • Hawkeye

    <strong>Katla</strong>: Are these even the same costume? I'm not sure, so I'll just vote for the one with the biggest explosion.<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> I liked the guy on the right better when he played the limping valet in Downton Abbey.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> Oh, hi, Jeremy Renner. I didn't see you there. No, I don't think your outfit needs more purple. No, I'm not busy later...<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> Neither one looks remotely like Alan Alda on <em>M*A*S*H</em>. Like in most endeavors, Alan Alda wins.<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> Fire and archery is too Hunger Games. Bro on the right wins for making me read.<br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> If Jeremy Renner calls Carol, EVERYONE wins.

  • Loki

    <strong>Katla</strong>: The horns on the woman's costume remind me of a bull, but it's hard to argue with the sequins. Sequins win.<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> I wish Tom Hiddleston would move his hand so I could make a comparative assessment of his cleavage. Impossible to judge this as it stands.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> Ugh, Hiddleston... we <em>get</em> it, you're the god of mischief. Relax. Lady wins for her refreshing 'over it' attitude, and because she wore a wrap.<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> Guy on the left's outfit looks like Lady Gaga if she were cast in the <em>Star Wars</em> prequels. Lady on the left looks like Uma Thurman's Poison Ivy in <em>Batman & Robin.</em> Since none of those things inspire faith in humanity, Alan Alda wins again.<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> Woman on the right wins for being like, "Whatever, I'll just show cleavage." This is America. If you don't have a gold-plated ram suit and tribal arm plates lying around the apartment, just wear something low-cut and no one at the convention center will care.<br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> Women, who are now both funny and box-office gold.

  • Agent Coulson

    <strong>Katla</strong>: The guy on the red carpet is just showing off. We get it, "Hollywood." We get it.<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> Dear red carpet guy, when the Men's Wearhouse spokesman said, "You're gonna like the way you look," he was lying.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> You fell victim to one of the classic blunders - The most famous of which is "never get involved in a land war in Asia" - but only slightly less well-known is this: "Never go against a Clark Gregg when being awesome is on the line."<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> Doesn't the guy on the right have a Colombian brothel to visit? Guy on the left wins, because he's all, "The target has left the building."<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> Guy on the left is probably getting all kinds of Vitamin D in the sunlight from that plate glass roof, so he wins for bone fortification. <br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> Clark "Mothafuckin' Gregg.

  • Thor

    <strong>Katla</strong>: Thor on the left's physique is obviously more impressive, but those golden locks on the right take the cake.<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> Tough one. They both have that mismatched beard and hair color I like so much. In the end, though, I have to give this to Harry Knowles, in honor of all he's done for film criticism.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> Chris Hemsworth proves that being a smoking-hot classically-trained actor is nothing if you leave the house without a hat. Gross.<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> The only thing more amusing to me than imagining Chris Hemsworth proposing to the guy on the right is that Mr. Platinum is <em>not</em> having it. Guy on the right, for his sass.<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> Both of these guys lose for not replying to the e-mail entitled "d8 2nite?" I BCC'ed them on.<br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> Makers of fine hammers everywhere.

  • Hulk

    <strong>Katla</strong>: This one's a no-brainer, people. Just look at the fury in the eyes of that kid. No one's going to mess with that.<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> Is there anything sadder than a child who can't color inside the lines? I shudder to think what this kid's SAT ovals are going to look like.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> Hulk on the left looks like how I feel looking at Hulk on the right.<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> The kid on the right submitted that photo to the casting director for "The Incredible Hulk." But they felt like he was "too tough" and went with Mark Ruffalo.<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> I feel like the kid went too derivative here. It's very Gotye 2.0. Hulk on the left wins for those traps and veins.<br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> Edward Norton.

  • Black Widow

    <strong>Katla</strong>: Hmm, I like the way the person on the right took a <em>really</em> literal approach. Are those surgically implanted legs? That's dedicated.<br> <strong>Mike:</strong> At least the spider's hair is real.<br> <strong>Carol:</strong> A little on the nose, spider. And I hate to be a broken record here, but <em>accessories</em>... how are you going to hold a gun with those weak little legs?<br> <strong>Ross:</strong> Show me the spider's nudez and then we'll talk.<br> <strong>Christine:</strong> Stark white backdrops win for having so much access to female spiders. <br> <strong>WINNER:</strong> The one that never married Ryan Reynolds.

  • Also On Huffington Post

    Actor Jeremy Renner shares his experiences from the set of The Avengers.


Filed by Carol Hartsell  |