Janean Chun
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Julie Howard, It's A Preemie Thing: Mom Builds Business Out Of Near Tragedy

Posted: 05/10/2012 5:31 pm Updated: 05/10/2012 6:02 pm

Julie Howard had waited her whole life to have a baby. And in an instant, her dream quickly turned into a nightmare -- both she and her baby almost died during the delivery process. But the harrowing ordeal also served as Howard's inspiration to start It's a Preemie Thing, a business that helps other families live through the neo-natal intensive care unit experience.

Almost immediately after getting married at age 39, the 16-year Army major underwent multiple rounds of in vitro fertilization. "My husband and I laughed that we are both so stubborn that our bodies are, too, and we just couldn't get pregnant," Howard said. "They had actually told us on the last round of IVF that they wouldn't try again if that round didn't work." But it did, and Howard finally got pregnant at age 41. When she found out, she said, "I burst out crying. I was thrilled."

That thrill soon turned to concern. Howard's baby was diagnosed with several conditions and wasn't predicted to live past two months. Howard was subsequently hospitalized and gave birth prematurely, nearly dying in the process. During the next 64 days in the neo-natal intensive care unit, Howard gave birth once more, to a business idea: clothing for preemies.

Though Spencer faces additional health challenges, he has outlasted his 2-month life expectancy and is currently a thriving 2-year-old. Meanwhile, Howard's almost 2-year-old business taking off. She sells her products online and in local hospitals, helping others endure a parent's worst nightmare.

What had doctors told you about your baby during your pregnancy?

At 18 weeks, during an ultrasound, they discovered he had what was called ventriculomegaly that was eventually going to lead to hydrocephalus, and one doctor told us his cerebellum was way smaller than normal and more than likely he wouldn't live past two months. We had discussed getting a brain shunt when he was born, because his ventricles became twice the size of normal. So we knew there were issues, but we just thought that would be something to deal with after 40 weeks, when I gave birth. We had no idea he would be born early. I just went in for a 28-week appointment for my gestational diabetes test, and I knew something was wrong because he was usually like an indoor soccer player, and after drinking that sugar water, there was no kicking whatsoever. So they hooked me up to some monitors and my blood pressure, which was normally about 116/55, and it had skyrocketed. They checked me into the hospital, put me on bed rest and told me it would probably be for a few months. I only made it four days until he arrived.

What happened on the day Spencer was born?

I was diagnosed with preeclampsia during those four days I was in the hospital. On Thanksgiving day, I sent my husband home and told him I'd be fine. A friend who happened to be a labor delivery nurse came up to visit, and I told her I didn't want to complain, because I'm an army major and we don't complain, but I kind of hurt. She asked what I meant, and I said it felt like someone was shooting a nail gun down my back. She freaked out and ran out and got help, and my blood pressure was 220/180. Apparently my body had gone into HELLP syndrome, when your body is shutting down to die. They said basically I had an hour to live. So my husband ran back to the hospital and they did an emergency C section and delivered my son. They just gave me an epidural and I was awake for the whole thing. They let me kiss his head, and they took him off.

So as you were giving birth, you expected to die right after that?

My husband did -- I never really thought about me dying. I guess I was just hoping the baby would be okay. The whole time, we didn't know if he was going to live, based on all the tests they'd run. One doctor told me that I should terminate because he'd only live two months, and I told her to leave the room and never come back. So I never really thought about me. I guess I'm too stubborn -- I just thought, I'm not going to die, end of story. I was more worried about him.

When you first saw him, what was your reaction?

He was beautiful. He was so tiny, but he was actually beautiful. I just remember thinking, "Oh my God, he's so tiny" and telling my husband to go with him. I just wanted to know if he was okay and when I could see him. They told me I couldn't see him for 72 hours because I wasn't allowed out of bed for 72 hours. I got caught eight hours later going down the hall. I told them, "You can fight me or help me. Those are your options." So they got a wheelchair and took me to see him. I just camped out in his room from then on until he came home.

Being in NICU for more than two months, did you get to meet the other parents of preemie babies?

I became friends with a mom who was also always there, and then we met other parents. There was a group of us, and we would rely on each other and talk and cry, or sit around and laugh and try to find humor in the situations. We talked about funny things for our kids to wear. This baby, Natalie, was born at 1 pound even and 11 inches long, and was going home on a G-tube, oxygen, apnea monitor and everything else, and that's when I came up with "O2 ... it's not just for old people." And we just burst out laughing. We kept coming up with funnier ones, and I thought, this would be fun to do as a side business while I'm in the Army.

So in the midst of the most difficult experiences, you felt it was important to keep your sense of humor intact?

The way my husband and I and luckily the other parents were, yes, we had to. It's so touch and go. There was a week where Spencer quit breathing and his heart stopped. It was the week of Christmas -- my first Christmas as a mother -- he was on a ventilator not breathing on his own, and they told me he might not make it through the week. It's too heartbreaking every day. I know it sounds bizarre to have a sense of humor, but you have to have something to bring your spirits up, because it's just too hard.

What was it like to be finally able to take Spencer home?

Whenever we left the NICU, we had to pass the normal labor delivery room. Every day we saw all these parents taking home their babies, and it was so depressing. So it was an oddly triumphant feeling, like, I finally get to take home my child. I guess like every mother feels that when you get to take home your child, except usually it's a few days and ours was a longer time. And then I was terrified of the car trip home. It was like, don't speed, don't go over bumps. I was terrified anything would happen to this little baby.

When did you start making the preemie clothing?

We left the hospital on Jan. 29, 2010, and I launched the company part time on Labor Day -- haha -- Sept. 6, 2010. At the end of September, when Spencer was 10 months old, we had to go in for a follow-up MRI on his brain. He was diagnosed with a rare brain malformation called rhombencephalosynapsis that has only been diagnosed in 50 to 60 cases worldwide. And they told us he may never walk, talk, roll over, sit up, anything. I told my husband, "I'm done. I'm staying home with him." I thought it would be okay to do one weekend a month in the Guard for a while, but I wasn't even up for that. I resigned from the Army in August 2011.

And then you focused on your business full time? Did your products focus not just on humor but on fulfulling a real need?

We couldn't find clothes that tiny. For his first outfit, his feet didn't even come to where the knees were supposed to be. So we started doing clothing because at the time, we couldn't find any. I have cute dresses and NICU wraps for babies 0-3 pounds, and then I have onesies and t-shirts with sayings. Our bestseller is "I'm older than I look." And then there are shirts that say, "No, really, I'm 1." I recently sold a "Seriously, I'm 2" in a 3-6-month size onesie. "Got sanitizer?" is also popular.

What reactions do you get from parents?

I'll be sitting at my computer crying because I got an email from a mom saying my Facebook posts got her through. Then a lot of times the babies I make stuff for don't make it, and that's the hardest thing. I was a hardcore Army officer and now I'm a blubbering idiot most of the time.

And how is Spencer now?

He's 29 months old, and he is truly beyond what I could ever imagine. He used a walker at 16 months on his own, even though he couldn't sit up or crawl yet. At 21 months, he took his own first steps. He falls a lot, but he is running now. He can count, speaks some Spanish, and the other day he was yelling "ni hao," which is Chinese for hello. He actually uses over 200 words in sign language, because we taught him sign language not knowing whether he was going to talk. He loved it because he could communicate exactly what he wanted. While other kids were pointing and grunting, Spencer would look at you and sign "I'm hungry." We'd ask what he was hungry for, and he'd sign "pears, cheese and crackers." He is a miracle, above average. He's still tiny -- he wears the "I'm older than I look" t-shirt quite often -- but yeah, he's doing fantastic.

Does what you went through add another dimension to being a mother?

It's hard to know how other mothers feel, but for preemie moms, everything is a huge victory. I think some moms may be like, "oh yeah, my baby is sitting up now," but Spencer didn't get into the sitting position until he was 17 months old, so for me that was like the invention of the cell phone. As a preemie mom, you appreciate everything just a little bit more.

And now, looking back, you probably think it's all worth it?

I wouldn't do this for anyone else. But I'd do it all again for him.

Entrepreneur Spotlight

Name: Julie Howard
Company: It's a Preemie Thing
Age: 44
Location: Woodinville, Wa.
Founded: 2010
Employees: One, part time
2012 Projected Revenue: Doubled 2011 sales within first four months of 2012
Website: www.itsapreemiething.com

Loading Slideshow...
  • Spencer Turns 10 Days Old

    Howard's first reaction upon seeing her son: "He was so tiny, but he was actually beautiful."

  • Helping Hand

    3-day-old Spencer holds his parents' hands.

  • Big Changes

    Spencer, with a stuffed bear that Howard's Army Sergeant brought to the hospital, in NICU -- and now.

  • Happy Together

    Howard with Spencer at 2 years old. Howard said, "I'd do it all again for him."

  • Model Son

    Spencer at the Seattle March for Babies in May 2012, wearing a custom It's a Preemie Thing shirt.

  • NICU Grad Onesie

  • 3 Pound Miracle Toddler T-shirt

  • No Really...I'm one! Onesie

  • Isaac Newton was a Preemie T-shirt

  • I'm Older than I look Onesie

  • Family of IAPT Shirts

  • Proud Mom of a Miracle Shirt and Million Dollar Baby Onesie

FOLLOW SMALL BUSINESS

Julie Howard had waited her whole life to have a baby. And in an instant, her dream quickly turned into a nightmare -- both she and her baby almost died during the delivery process. But the harrowing ...
Julie Howard had waited her whole life to have a baby. And in an instant, her dream quickly turned into a nightmare -- both she and her baby almost died during the delivery process. But the harrowing ...
 
 
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This user has chosen to opt out of the Badges program
12:33 PM on 05/12/2012
I'm glad it turned out well for them both. But I also must say I know of older (one was 43 and and very surprised!) mothers who bore more-premature TWINS without using in-vitro -- it just happened! And, they now are working twice as hard to cope each day. I often think that AI is talked about with a diminished emphasis on the grave risks/less-than-optimal outcomes and the potential for life-long issues and very HARD work. At some point, why not ADOPT (I certainly considered it!) especially as we near 40, and age when we used to be called "geriatric mothers." I was 34 and 38 when my kids were born, some 20 years ago, we heard that demeaning term from OB-GYN world. But it does, in its own perverse way, remind you what the human body can (and maybe will struggle to) do at certain ages. Biological motherhood is a limited time window. All the rest of those stories are simply doctors' egos stroking themselves! Or perhaps PARENTS' ego??
04:08 PM on 05/12/2012
You're such a hypocrite!!...Coming from someone who birthed two babies during her Advanced Maternal Age!!! It's obvious you're struggling with or perhaps regret your decision of motherhood; perhaps you should seek help to delve into and explore your feelings.
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05:48 PM on 05/20/2012
Please... just pointing out that if I had not been able to conceive naturally, I would have adopted. Many babies out there who could use a family. Get over yourself! 
07:39 PM on 05/11/2012
Touching story, it brought tears to my eyes... and very inspiring to other parents going through similar experiences. Little Spencer is a fighter and he was able to feel his parents love despite the incubator barrier, and that makes a world of difference for some babies to pull through. However; I do have some constructive criticism, I understand the point you were trying to make with feeling overjoyed when your little guy achieves something new but all mothers feel the same and it's ignorant to depreciate/ devalue their experience. I'm aware this article was telling your story and the challenges you faced but just keep in mind that there are millions of parents suffering and going through heartwrenching experiences themselves with their children in cases that have nothing to do with premature birth.
To the bloggers who are criticizing this couple for having children in their later years... Yes, there's research that says the risks increase past 35 yrs of age but, there's also a sleuth of evidence that parents of various ages are birthing babies with numerous types of complications and preeclampsia is a disease more prevalent in young mothers... so before you talk to your research!!!
12:42 AM on 05/14/2012
To give you a bit of perspective....Julie is not alone. I ran a NICU family support program at a very large hospital in Seattle and Julie's feelings are extremely common amongst parents of preemies. I think where most preemie mothers are coming from is this: For *most* parents it is an expectation that their child will sit up, talk, crawl, walk. For those of us with micropreemies, there are very staggering odds that our children may not do one or more of these things. I found myself feeling more relief than joy when my son achieved his milestones. From what I can gather in talking with all of the women in my life who had full-term children born without complications, they never feared their child wouldn't do those things.
07:22 PM on 05/11/2012
I think people tend to forget that pregnancy is a very dangerous thing, for both mommy and baby, regardless of the age of the mother. I was 24 when I had my first son. I had no complications, didn't even feel a single contration until 1 hour after my water broke at 33 weeks. My son spent 2 weeks in the NICU, and those were the scariest 2 weeks of my life. Each day I would go to the hospital wondering what new machine or tube he was attached to. Today he is 2 1/2, we've had our share of developmental delays and he is very small, but he never ceases to amaze me. My second pregnancy was also complication free, up until 30 weeks when I started dilating. I was put on strict bedrest and given medication to stop the contractions, but that only delayed the inevitable. He was born at 36 weeks and also spent time in the NICU. My doctor doesn't know why I can't carry to term, it's just something that happened. God bless this family for defying the odds stacked against them. Spencer is a lucky child to have such awesome, loving parents.
04:26 PM on 05/11/2012
My son was born at 27 weeks gestation. He was 1lb13oz. He is now a healthy 5 year old. We were in the NICU for 3 months and he had NEC. I am so thankful for all of the wonderful nurses and doctors that took care of him, but I wish I could have met parents like Julie. When he was there the other parents were very standoffish and it was a very lonely time for me. oh, and for the people that want to say something about age, I was 26.
04:11 PM on 05/11/2012
This is a great story. I am so happy to hear you and Spencer are doing well. Currently I am going to school to become a Neonatal Practitioner so hearing stories like this really touch me.
04:01 PM on 05/11/2012
Ma'm you and you husband were given a very special gift. I use you rank as I am veteran. Your little man is here with the vey best of parents. Now to those that say its all due to your age....thats got nothing to do with it. Be the rock this little boy will need, and he'll always be a source of love and joy for his parents !!!
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Denise Ellis Hooks
03:52 PM on 05/11/2012
My son was born 2 months early and the preemie clothes my Mom bought were huge on him lolol It's an amazing process to go thru. Now he is a 6 ft. 2In. big strapping almost straight A 10th grader. God Bless Motherhood!!!!
03:35 PM on 05/11/2012
While Julie is quite capable of defending herself....I have to respond to the mean spirited and uninformed comments from a couple of readers.

HELLP syndrome can hit any pregnant mother at any age. I was 33 and the picture of amazing health....was a personal trainer if that tells you anything. I happened to be lucky enough to get pregnant easily. I was unlucky enough to have no idea that I had 2 copies of a clotting mutation that was going to eventually begin to clot up my son's placenta. I, too, got HELLP syndrome at 27 weeks and my son was born at 1.5 lbs.

I was lucky enough to be cared for by the same doctors and hospital as Julie's baby. My son is now 6 1/2 and doing amazingly well with no evident signs of prematurity whatsoever.

Julie and Andre are amazing people who are a joy to be around and anybody would be lucky to have met them or know them. They are doing an amazing job raising Spencer who will no doubt have his mother's positive outlook on life as well as her bubbly personality and sense of humor.

Spencer will also likely have his mother's sense of compassion and empathy rub off on him....which is more than I can say for the likes of the mean-spirited and tragically uninformed commenters earlier in the thread.
08:58 AM on 05/12/2012
what exactly is HELLP syndrome, I for one, never heard of it.
12:59 PM on 05/12/2012
HELLP syndrome is generally regarded as a complication of pre-eclampsia. It's characterized with Hemolysis (breakdown of red blood cells which can cause multi system organ failure as well as other problems), Elevated Liver enzymes (because the liver is starting to swell and shut down) and Low Platelets (which leads to life threatening clotting problems), also blood pressure is so much higher with HELLP than standard pre-eclampsia that stroke and seizure are a very real concern.

I was 25 with my very first pregnancy an I developed HELLP syndrome at 30 weeks 2 days
03:33 PM on 05/11/2012
god bless her
03:11 PM on 05/11/2012
amazing & wonderful !! i had tears in my eyes while reading your story...heartwarming & beautiful. im a adult cardiac nurse, but i have also worked in the NICU....those babies are incredible. i am so excited that God gave YOU & your hubby little Spencer...he really needed a mommy like you !!! thanks for letting us know how much he has PROGRESSED ....YAAYYYY!! AND...by the way...congratulations on 'firing" that doctor !!! i hope he knows of Spencer's success story !!
02:41 PM on 05/11/2012
This is one of the sweetest stories I have read in a long time. Both of my children were preemies as well as my niece. NICU and preemies are hard and it doesn't matter how long or short of a time you are there, it is no easier either way! Thanks for sharing!!!!
02:36 PM on 05/11/2012
I'm glad you were able to turn your experience into a way to help others! As the mom of a 28 week, 2 lb 5 oz preemie (who will be 3 in July), I know how difficult the NICU experience can be. I searched for support online when he was born and found nothing. It's so important for NICU parents to support each other because unless you've been there, you just can't understand.
02:26 PM on 05/11/2012
wow adorable :))))))))) preemie bady stay alive ..make sute test baby are tiny 17" inch.. weight less 3=5 lb.stay healt :))))))) ... if preemie die low birth 1 pound can died.. nice story......
02:16 PM on 05/11/2012
I want to give you hope. There are probably more out there with rhombencephalosynapsis than you know. I found out I have it back in 2003. In August, I will be 50. I also have Arnold Chiari Malformation -- discovered in 2000. I also have 2 wonderful daughters. They are 22 and 24.
I was also a 'failure to thrive' baby.
Your family is in my prayers.
11:55 AM on 05/12/2012
Would love to get in contact with you Tina if possible to discuss RS! How can I do that?
02:03 PM on 05/11/2012
And this is why you don't wait until you're 40 to have kids. She forced her body to have a baby that it knew it couldn't support. That poor baby will have senior citizens as parents when he's 20.
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TheReader2011
02:47 PM on 05/11/2012
Amen. Too many old woman have kids who are not healthy.
03:12 PM on 05/11/2012
Are you kidding me? I was in my mid 20's and very healthy when I had my son at 27 weeks and he was born at the same gestational age (and almost the same weight) as Julie's son. In fact, I was in the NICU with her in Seattle so I know her personally. There were moms of every age, race, and economic status we met while in the NICU. It can (and does) happen to anyone.
photo
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shisterkatz
Why can't we all just get along?
03:46 PM on 05/11/2012
40 is not old and unhealthy. Anyone able to have a child should. I wish I could have a child. If they came up with a reproductive system transplant I would do it in a heart beat. I was 21 when diagnosed with ovarian cancer and had to get a total hysterectomy. How dare anyone who critisizes her for wanting to be a mommie.
She did not enter into this thinking there would be complications. BTW my best friend had a healthy baby boy at the age of 40.
02:50 PM on 05/11/2012
Who gets to decide what is the "right" age to become a parent? That is very personal and one size surely doesn't fit all! Pregnant women have pre-eclampsia every day and age has nothing to do with it! As for the age of his parents when he is 20, who cares! There are many children that have never even known their parents or have lost their parents at an early age and I am sure that they would love to have "senior citizen" parents!