The Sheriff's Office that arrested Fiona Apple last week has a message for the singer: "Just shut up and sing."
Apple was arrested on Wednesday at a border stop in Sierra Blanca, Texas, after a routine check by patrol officers turned up small amounts of both marijuana and hashish, according to police. Apple was taken to Hudspeth County jail, and was released on Sept. 20 after posting bond. On Friday, the 35-year-old singer shared a few details of her run-in with the law with the audience at her Houston show.
Apple's first public statement since the arrest was a bizarre rant about the treatment she received while in jail, in which she made allegations of "inappropriate" and "probably illegal" conduct.
On Monday, the Hudspeth County Sheriff's office responded to those claims, reports TMZ. Information officer Rusty Fleming personally responded to Apple's rant, with an angry and condescending letter:
First, Honey, I'm already more famous than you, I don't need your help. However, it would appear that you need mine....
Two weeks ago nobody in the country cared about what you had to say, -- now that you've been arrested it appears your entire career has been jump-started. Don't worry Sweetie, I won't bill you...
Next, have you ever heard of Snoop, Willie or Armand Hammer? Maybe if you would read something besides your own press releases, you would have known BEFORE you got here, that if you come to Texas with dope, the cops will take your DOPE away and put YOU in jail...
Even though you and I only met briefly in the hallway, I don't know you but I'm sure you're an awesome and talented young woman and even though I'm not a fan of yours, I am sure there are thousands of them out there, and I'm sure that they would just as soon you get this all behind you and let you go back to what you do best-so my last piece of advice is simple "just shut-up and sing."
We're still not quite sure what Apple was alluding to that took place while she was in police custody, but it's clear that she made quite the impression on the folks at the Sheriff's Office.
Fiona Apple was arrested on drug possession charges on Sept. 19 at a border stop in Sierra Blanca, Texas. When officers searched her tour bus they allegedly found hashish.
Amanda Bynes was arrested on April 6, 2012 and charged with a DUI after she sideswiped a police car.
In this handout photograph supplied by the Aspen Police Department, 34-year-old Brooke Mueller poses for her mugshot after being arrested and charged with assualt and possession of cocaine with intent to distribute on December 3, 2011 in Aspen, Colorado. The ex-wife of American actor Charlie Sheen was arrested in the early hours of December 3, 2011 after a woman reported an assualt identifying Mueller as the assailant. (Getty)
In this police mug shot from the DeKalb County Sheriff's Office, Pittsburg Steelers' receiver Hines Ward poses for a mug shot, on July 09, 2011 in DeKalb County, Georgia. According to reports Ward was arrested for driving under the influence of alcohol. (Getty)
In this booking photo provided by the San Bernardino County Sheriff's Office, Samantha Ronson poses for a mug shot August 1, 2011 in Barstow, California. Ronson was arrested for DUI after being pulled over for speeding near Baker, California. (Getty)
In this booking photo provided by the the Brunswick County Sheriff's Department, Jenelle Evans poses for a mug shot August 8, 2011 in Oak Island, North Carolina. Evans, of MTV's 'Teen Mom 2', was arrested Monday for violating the terms of her probation after testing possitive for Marijuanna and opiates. Evans was placed in jail on USD 10,000 bond and later released. (Getty)
In this booking photo provided by the Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department, Lindsay Lohan is seen in a mug shot October 19, 2011 in Los Angeles, California. Lohan was arrested for probation violations and released after posting USD 100,000 bail. (Getty)
In this mug shot released by the 2011 Hillsborough County Jail, Michael Lohan, 51, poses for his mugshot after being arrested for battery domestic violence on October 25, 2011 in Hillsborough County, Tampa, Florida. Lohan, was also previously arrested in 2009 in New York for allegedly violating a protection order against him. (Getty)
Here is actor Nicolas Cage after he was arrested for domestic battery in New Orleans at 6.33am on Saturday April 16. Police charged him with domestic abuse and disturbing the peace. Booking photo and report courtesy of Orleans Parish Sheriff's Office. (Splash)
Andy Dick smirks in his mugshot after being arrested at a restaurant in Temecula, California, for allegedly being under the influence of drugs or alcohol. The 45-year-old comic was listed on the booking sheet as 5ft 10in and weighing 155lbs. He was apparently at 9.20pm on May 2 at a Marie Callenders, not a restaurant chain known as a celebrity hotspot. (Splash)
Russell Brand was arrested on March 15 after allegedly throwing and smashing a photographer's iPhone in New Orleans. (New Orleans Parish Sheriff's Office)
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