Huffpost Comedy

Presidential Debate Drinking Game: Live Drink Obama & Romney's Last Showdown With Us

Posted: Updated:
HuffPost Comedy

While you're watching the debate at 9 p.m. EST tonight (which you can do here, live), play* our drinking game while following along with live commentary from our quick-witted friends at Witstream.

*Note: Don't actually do this; you will die. Avoid the butt-chugging in particular.

If this...Do This
Obama says 47%Pop a can of the cheapest beer you can find, chug patriotically
Romney cites unemployment statsDrink 8.3% of your beer
Camera cuts to sleeping audience member Take a 5 hour energy shot
Obama mentions Romney's tax returns Hide your drink somewhere in the room and pretend it's not there
Romney suggests starting a war with Iran Sprint out of the bar and find a nuclear fallout shelter
Anyone mentions MormonismDrink a shot of water
Camera pans to Joe Biden Take a sip of your drink then point at your TV and wink
"The Ryan Budget" is invokedSteal the drink of someone over the age of 65
Anyone says "redistribution"Pour half your drink in someone's empty glass
Romney defends traditional marriageDrink a bottle of sherry alone in your bedroom while your husband is out galavanting with his secretary again, leaving you home with the kids. Call your mother and ask her if she and dad were really happy for all those years.
Any Romney "Zinger" Take a drink and do a 'Yo Mama' joke about the person next to you
Jeremiah Wright is mentioned Finish your drink and smack your forehead really hard
Obama says "Let me be clear"Vodka/Gin shot
Obama appears "professorial" Mix vodka martini, extra dry
Someone brings up Romney's Massachusetts record Drink a Cape Codder
Someone brings up raising college tuitionButt chug
Romney slams entitlements Snatch up everyone's drinks until they explain why they deserve them
Someone brings up leaving debt for our children Stop drinking so you don't have post-debate unprotected sex
Obama mentions Bin LadenCut open a football, pour a Sam Adams lager into it, drink, spike football
Candidates spar over whether healthcare reform should be called Obamacare or RomneycarePerform minor surgery on whatever your most pressing ailment is, use grain alcohol for antiseptic/anesthesia
Obama refers to "The same policies that got us into this mess"Drink whichever wine cooler made you throw up for the first time as a teenager
Romney asks if we're better off than we were four years agoOpen a bottle of champagne and remember how you felt four years ago
Post-debate, Fox pundit immediately declares Romney the clear winner Drink celebratory Jäger bombs knowing your beliefs about the opposition have been confirmed
Post-debate, MSNBC pundit immediately declares Obama the clear winnerDrink celebratory Jäger bombs knowing your beliefs about the opposition have been confirmed

Also on HuffPost:

Funniest Beer Names
Share this
Current Slide

Suggest a correction