Here at HuffPost Weird News, we have a little saying for exceptional stories: "We've all been there."
But really, our readers are too smart to pull the kind of shenanigans that comprise our Best Dumb Crime Stories of 2012. You've never strutted your stuff in Walmart wearing nothing but your birthday suit and your pet hamster is not in protective custody because you got behind the wheel under the influence of alcohol. If you've been there, give us a call. If not, enjoy these wacky run-ins with the law and have a Happy Holiday and wonderfully weird new year.