University Of Miami Grad Touts "Alarming Level Of Pride" Despite Zero Job Prospects On The Onion (VIDEO)

Man Has Alarming Level Of Pride In Institution That Left Him $50,000 In Debt, Inadequately Prepared For Job Market

UUUUUU...oh.

The Onion poked fun at the often debt-loading cost of higher ed at the University of Miami this week with the news story "Man Has Alarming Level Of Pride In Institution That Left Him $50,000 In Debt, Inadequately Prepared For Job Market."

Reports also confirmed that the man who acquired no marketable job skills as an undergraduate regularly spends his weekends watching Hurricanes football games with several of his friends from college, who are collectively over a quarter million dollars in debt.

“Whenever I go back to [the] Coral Gables [campus], it just brings back all those great memories of my time there,” said Felder, who has been unable to utilize his $35,000-a-year education to land a job that could possibly grow into a long-term and stable career. “The nightlife is amazing, we have awesome sports teams, and the campus is practically right on the beach. And everybody knows UM has the hottest girls.”

Read the whole story at The Onion, but first check out "Class of 2006 alumnus" Mark Felder above as goes all Typical Miami Fan while sitting in what's probably his room at his parents' house -- not that we can tell based on intimate knowledge. Nope. This situation doesn't look familiar at all.