Stephen Colbert was honored to be included in Maxim's "Hot 100" list of the most beautiful women in 2012, but this year he has nothing but contempt for the gentleman's magazine.
After being replaced as the 69th most beautiful woman in the world by Manti Te'o's fake girlfriend (no, seriously), Colbert, who turned 49 this week, dedicated a portion of Tuesday night's "Colbert Report" to calling out Maxim for "age discrimination."
"Do you have any idea how hard it is to stay young and firm? I've had so much fat from my ass injected into my face that my dentist is a proctologist!" Colbert lamented before drowning his sorrows in a pint of Ben & Jerry's.
"I just want to be objectified like a piece of meat, is that so much to ask?"