Think you can spot an introvert in a crowd? Think again. Although the stereotypical introvert may be the one at the party who's hanging out alone by the food table fiddling with an iPhone, the "social butterfly" can just as easily have an introverted personality.
"Spotting the introvert can be harder than finding Waldo," Sophia Dembling, author of "The Introvert's Way: Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World," tells The Huffington Post. "A lot of introverts can pass as extroverts."
People are frequently unaware that they’re introverts -– especially if they’re not shy -- because they may not realize that being an introvert is about more than just cultivating time alone. Instead, it can be more instructive to pay attention to whether they're losing or gaining energy from being around others, even if the company of friends gives them pleasure.
“Introversion is a basic temperament, so the social aspect -- which is what people focus on -- is really a small part of being an introvert," Dr. Marti Olsen Laney, psychotherapist and author of "The Introvert Advantage," said in a Mensa discussion. "It affects everything in your life.”
Despite the growing conversation around introversion, it remains a frequently misunderstood personality trait. As recently as 2010, the American Psychiatric Association even considered classifying "introverted personality" as a disorder by listing it in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM-5), a manual used to diagnose mental illness.
But more and more introverts are speaking out about what it really means to be a "quiet" type. Not sure if you're an innie or an outie? See if any of these 23 telltale signs of introversion apply to you.
1. You find small talk incredibly cumbersome.
Introverts are notoriously small talk-phobic, as they find idle chatter to be a source of anxiety, or at least annoyance. For many quiet types, chitchat can feel disingenuous.
“Let's clear one thing up: Introverts do not hate small talk because we dislike people," Laurie Helgoe writes in "Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life Is Your Hidden Strength." "We hate small talk because we hate the barrier it creates between people.”
2. You go to parties -– but not to meet people.
If you're an introvert, you may sometimes enjoy going to parties, but chances are, you're not going because you're excited to meet new people. At a party, most introverts would rather spend time with people they already know and feel comfortable around. If you happen to meet a new person that you connect with, great -- but meeting people is rarely the goal.
3. You often feel alone in a crowd.
Ever feel like an outsider in the middle of social gatherings and group activities, even with people you know?
"If you tend to find yourself feeling alone in a crowd, you might be an introvert," says Dembling. "We might let friends or activities pick us, rather than extending our own invitations."
4. Networking makes you feel like a phony.
Networking (read: small-talk with the end goal of advancing your career) can feel particularly disingenuous for introverts, who crave authenticity in their interactions.
"Networking is stressful if we do it in the ways that are stressful to us," Dembling says, advising introverts to network in small, intimate groups rather than at large mixers.
5. You've been called "too intense."
Do you have a penchant for philosophical conversations and a love of thought-provoking books and movies? If so, you're a textbook introvert.
"Introverts like to jump into the deep end," says Dembling.
6. You're easily distracted.
While extroverts tend to get bored easily when they don't have enough to do, introverts have the opposite problem -- they get easily distracted and overwhelmed in environments with an excess of stimulation.
"Extroverts are commonly found to be more easily bored than introverts on monotonous tasks, probably because they require and thrive on high levels of stimulation," Clark University researchers wrote in a paper published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology. "In contrast, introverts are more easily distracted than extroverts and, hence, prefer relatively unstimulating environments."
7. Downtime doesn’t feel unproductive to you.
One of the most fundamental characteristics of introverts is that they need time alone to recharge their batteries. Whereas an extrovert might get bored or antsy spending a day at home alone with tea and a stack of magazines, this sort of down time feels necessary and satisfying to an introvert.
8. Giving a talk in front of 500 people is less stressful than having to mingle with those people afterwards.
Introverts can be excellent leaders and public speakers -- and although they're stereotyped as being the shrinking violet, they don't necessarily shy away from the spotlight. Performers like Lady Gaga, Christina Aguilera and Emma Watson all identify as introverts, and an estimated 40 percent of CEOs have introverted personalities. Instead, an introvert might struggle more with meeting and greeting large groups of people on an individual basis.
9. When you get on the subway, you sit at the end of the bench -– not in the middle.
Whenever possible, introverts tend to avoid being surrounded by people on all sides.
"We're likely to sit in places where we can get away when we're ready to -- easily," says Dembling. "When I go to the theater, I want the aisle seat or the back seat."
10. You start to shut down after you’ve been active for too long.
Do you start to get tired and unresponsive after you've been out and about for too long? It's likely because you’re trying to conserve energy. Everything introverts do in the outside world causes them to expend energy, after which they'll need to go back and replenish their stores in a quiet environment, says Dembling. Short of a quiet place to go, many introverts will resort to zoning out.
11. You're in a relationship with an extrovert.
It's true that opposites attract, and introverts frequently gravitate towards outgoing extroverts who encourage them to have fun and not take themselves too seriously.
"Introverts are sometimes drawn to extroverts because they like being able to ride their 'fun bubble,'" Dembling says.
12. You'd rather be an expert at one thing than try to do everything.
The dominant brain pathways introverts use is one that allows you to focus and think about things for a while, so they’re geared toward intense study and developing expertise, according to Olsen Laney.
13. You actively avoid any shows that might involve audience participation.
Because really, is anything more terrifying?
14. You screen all your calls -- even from friends.
You may not pick up your phone even from people you like, but you’ll call them back as soon as you’re mentally prepared and have gathered the energy for the conversation.
"To me, a ringing phone is like having somebody jump out of a closet and go 'BOO!,'" says Dembling. "I do like having a long, nice phone call with a friend -- as long as it's not jumping out of the sky at me."
15. You notice details that others don't.
The upside of being overwhelmed by too much stimuli is that introverts often have a keen eye for detail, noticing things that may escape others around them. Research has found that introverts exhibit increased brain activity when processing visual information, as compared to extroverts.
16. You have a constantly running inner monologue.
“Extroverts don’t have the same internal talking as we do,” says Olsen Laney. “Most introverts need to think first and talk later."
17. You have low blood pressure.
A 2006 Japanese study found that introverts tend to have lower blood pressure than their extroverted counterparts.
18. You’ve been called an “old soul” -– since your 20s.
Introverts observe and take in a lot of information, and they think before they speak, leading them to appear wise to others.
"Introverts tend to think hard and be analytical," says Dembling. "That can make them seem wise."
19. You don't feel "high" from your surroundings
Neurochemically speaking, things like huge parties just aren’t your thing. Extroverts and introverts differ significantly in how their brains process experiences through "reward" centers.
Researchers demonstrated this phenomenon by giving Ritalin -- the ADHD drug that stimulates dopamine production in the brain -- to introverted and extroverted college students. They found that extroverts were more likely to associate the feeling of euphoria achieved by the rush of dopamine with the environment they were in. Introverts, by contrast, did not connect the feeling of reward to their surroundings. The study "suggests that introverts have a fundamental difference in how strongly they process rewards from their environment, with the brains of introverts weighing internal cues more strongly than external motivational and reward cues," explained LiveScience's Tia Ghose.
20. You look at the big picture.
When describing the way that introverts think, Jung explained that they're more interested in ideas and the big picture rather than facts and details. Of course, many introverts excel in detail-oriented tasks -- but they often have a mind for more abstract concepts as well.
"Introverts do really enjoy abstract discussion," says Dembling.
21. You’ve been told to “come out of your shell.”
Many introverted children come to believe that there's something "wrong" with them if they're naturally less outspoken and assertive than their peers. Introverted adults often say that as children, they were told to come out of their shells or participate more in class.
22. You’re a writer.
Introverts are often better at communicating in writing than in person, and many are drawn to the solitary, creative profession of writing. Most introverts -- like "Harry Potter" author J.K. Rowling -- say that they feel most creatively charged when they have time to be alone with their thoughts.
23. You alternate between phases of work and solitude, and periods of social activity.
Introverts can move around their introverted “set point” which determines how they need to balance solitude with social activity. But when they move too much -- possibly by over-exerting themselves with too much socializing and busyness -- they get stressed and need to come back to themselves, according Olsen Laney. This may manifest as going through periods of heightened social activity, and then balancing it out with a period of inwardness and solitude.
"There's a recovery point that seems to be correlated with how much interaction you've done," says Dembling. "We all have our own private cycles."
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Half Sun Salutation (Surya Namaskara)
Sun Salutation sequences are traditionally performed as a way to awaken the body. "This is great to do upon rising, even before you have had your first cup of coffee," Bielkus says. To perform the sequence, stand up straight in <a href="http://www.yogajournal.com/poses/492" target="_blank">Mountain Pose</a> (<em>Tadasana</em>) with the feet together and arms at the side of the body with open palms. Sweep the arms up and extend them over the head on the inhale, then exhale and bow forward into a forward bend. On the inhale, lift the torso halfway up, place your hands at your shins and extend the spine. Fold forward again on the exhale. When you inhale, sweep back up and bring the palms together into prayer. Repeat this sequence three or four times. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0LPLwC4pRzk" target="_blank">Click here </a>for a video tutorial.
Camel Pose (Ustrasana)
The gentle heart-opening stretch of the camel pose -- performed either with the hands on the lower back or reaching down to touch the heels -- can be highly invigorating for the entire body. "Camel is great because it's a total front-body opener," Bielkus says. "You have the front of the legs moving forward. ... The core is stretching and the torso is lengthening up. The chest is really opening and expanding so that the lungs can expand full of breath."
Warrior II Pose (Virabhadrasana II)
"This pose combines both leg strengthening and mild back bending, bringing energy into the body," Bielkus says. "Just like the name suggests, this pose awakens the warrior within -- power and strength, but with ease." <a href="http://www.yogajournal.com/poses/495" target="_blank">Click here for basic Warrior II instructions</a>, and try adding what Bielkus calls the "breath of fire" for an extra energy boost. "A great way to rev up this posture is to add in breath of fire -- rapid belly breath, focusing on the exhalation," Bielkus says. "To start, take a deep breath in and then pump the navel in as you exhale. The inhale will take care of itself."
Triangle Pose (Utthita Trikonasana)
After Warrior II, try going into a restorative Triangle Pose. Straighten the front knee and extend the arm forward and then down to the shin, the floor next to the leg, or a block. Reach the other arm up and turn to face the sky, breathing deeply for five breaths, Bielkus advises. Then, repeat on the other side. "This pose is about fully expanding not contracting," Bielkus says. "Focus less about stretching and more about expanding and bringing breath and energy to every cell, every skin pore, every fiber of your being."
Side Plank (Vasisthasana)
For the whole body-strengthening Side Plank, start in a plank pose. Turn to the right side, stacking the feet on top of each other, and lifting the left hand. Breath deeply for five breaths before repeating on the other side. If you're looking to modify the pose, Bielkus suggests bringing either the bottom knee or the forearm down to the ground. "Yoga brings our mind to a oneness and a focused attention," Bielkus says, regarding the balancing poses. "The more that we're coming into a mental clarity or focus, the less energy we're expending on that stress. The cortisol levels can drop and then we feel a little more energized."
Chair Pose (Utkatasana)
The dynamic Chair Pose is performed by standing with the feet together or hip-width apart, and bending the lower body down as if you were sitting on a chair. Raise the arms to the ears and raise the chest up to complete the pose. "This pose is literally translates from Sanskrit as 'powerful' pose," says Bielkus. "Sometimes in class, I refer to it as lighting bolt pose because [of] the amount of energy it creates in the body by using the big muscles of the legs and glutes while also creating a slight backbend, which awakens the spine."
Half-Moon Pose (Ardha Chandrasana)
In addition to warding off stress and anxiety, the Half Moon Pose can be therapeutic for fatigue, <a href="http://www.yogajournal.com/poses/784" target="_blank">according to <em>Yoga Journal</em></a>. In a forward fold, bring the right hand about 10 inches in front of you and slightly to the right, extending the left leg up while the hips and torso open. Extend the left arm up and hold the pose for five breaths before repeating on the other side. "Any balancing poses are great for finding that inner balance," Bielkus says.
Bridge Pose (Setu Bandha Sarvangasana)
"Back bends are all about unlocking the energy of the spine and nervous system," Bielkus says. Lying on your back, bend the knees and place your feet flat on the floor with arms by your sides. Lift the hips up high and interlace the hands together or leave the arms at the sides of the body. Breathe deeply for five breaths and repeat several times.
Locust Pose (Salabhasana)
For this strengthening pose, lie on your belly with arms by your side and palms down. Then, gently lift the arms, legs, chest and head off the floor and breathe deeply for five breaths, trying to lift up higher with each breath. Repeat three or four times, being careful not to strain the neck. For more of a challenge, extend the arms in front of you, as pictured at left. "You're really stimulating the upper, middle and lower back, and the muscles of the hamstrings are engaging" Bielkus says. "You're using so many muscles in the body to lift yourself off the earth. The neurons are firing to make that all happen."
Right Nostril Breathing (Surya Bhedana)
This energizing <em>pranayama</em> (breathing exercise) offers a counterpoint to the calming <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/06/30/yoga-for-sleep_n_3505226.html#slide=2629257" target="_blank">left nostril breath</a>. To perform the exercise, sit upright in a chair or on the floor in a comfortable cross-legged position, blocking the left nostril with the thumb and extending the fingers. Breathe long and deep, in and out of the right nostril for around five minutes, Bielkus advises. "The right nostril is associated with the energy of the sun," Bielkus says. "This breath is stimulating, invigorating and awakening."