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George Clooney Has Declared War On Tina Fey & Amy Poehler... Matt Damon Is Collateral Damage

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CLOONEY TINA AMY
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So remember that time, not so long ago, when Tina Fey and Amy Poehler cracked on George Clooney at the Golden Globes? It went a little something like this:

"'Gravity' is nominated for Best Film. It's the story of how George Clooney would rather float away into space and die than spend one more minute with a woman his own age."

We all laughed... why wouldn't we? Clooney himself, who wasn't present at the awards ceremony, even admitted later on Access Hollywood that, "It was a really good joke." But he also pointed out that Fey and Poehler had, "poked the bear with a stick."

Clooney's the bear, y'all.

And like all bears, George Clooney is also a noted prankster. Enter poor Matt "Garbage Man" Damon.

Apparently, Clooney Bear dug into his bag of tricks and printed out some stationery with Damon's name on it — a stunt he pulled using Brad Pitt's name a few years ago — and sent an unhappy missive to Fey and Poehler, excoriating them for this playful jab from the Globes:

"Matt, on any other night in any other room, you would be a big deal. But tonight — and don't take this the wrong way — you're basically a garbage person."

So, the two hosts responded to the fake Damon note the only way they could, with two giant fruit baskets accompanied by two letters. And from there, we'll let the garbage man take it:

Nice joke, Clooney Bear. Even better response, Fey-Po. Sorry you got caught in the crossfire, Good Will Garbage Person.

But is this the end of the story? Not quite. Clooney has a part two of his own, one that he promised in an interview with SiriusXM would be "downright dirty."

We are breathless with anticipation.

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