9 People Who Will Throw A Wrench In Your Dinner Party

Only the best eaters allowed.

Throwing a dinner party is like choreographing a modern dance; there are a lot of moving parts you have to keep in check. The food has to be perfectly timed, the drinks delicately executed and the final course should wow. But your work for a dinner party starts way before the actual dinner. It begins with the guests you invite. Because no matter how perfectly your salt-crusted fish entree came out, it won't make up for the damper bad dinner guests put on an evening.

As much as we love our family and friends, some of them just do not make good additions to a dinner party. Not only do dinner guests have to be socially adept, but they should love food and drink. And most of all, they should be easy going. If you're looking to throw a successful dinner party, one that you as the host will be able to relaxactually enjoy, these are the nine people you might want to cross off your list.

No offense to anyone's personal life choices, we respect them 100 percent, we're just talking about dinner parties here...

1
The Lush
Flickr: Leonid Mamchenkov
We love the lush for getting the party started. They tend to get people talking and make everyone feel more comfortable. That is until they've had that one drink too many; the one that takes them from charmingly buzzed to embarrassingly drunk. Not worth the gamble guys.
2
The Person Who Eats WAY TOO SLOWLY
Flickr: alaina buzas
Some people want to savor their food, we get that. But please don't make everyone wait 30 minutes for you to finish three asparagus spears. Try and keep up.
3
The Paleo Dieter
Flickr: Next TwentyEight
Just look at that chart! How are we non-Paleo dieters suppose to get this straight in time to have people over for dinner? Don't even try. Repeat after us: "No, we will not make your pizza with a cauliflower crust or even a bacon crust. Please just stop ruining everything that is good about food."
4
The Wine Snob
Flickr: Beraldo Leal
Dear oenophile: we love that you love wine, because we love wine too. But your wine nerdery makes us feel insecure about the merlot we're pairing with our rack of lamb. (Is it okay?? Can you tell that it only costs $12???) Also, the way you aggressively swivel your glass makes us nervous that you're going to drench the person sitting to your left in red wine -- and we don't have any clean shirts to spare.
5
The Gluten-Free Dieter
Flickr: Czarina Alegre
As hard as you try to be careful when preparing a meal for someone who follows a gluten-free diet, there will almost always be one small detail where you will slip and accidentally sneak in gluten -- like with the splash of soy sauce you added to your salad dressing. SURPRISE! Soy sauce is loaded with gluten. If your gluten-free guest has serious allergies, this could make for a very scary night. (Maybe have them over for drinks instead, where you have less chances of doing them harm.)
6
The Person Who Eats Like A Bird
Flickr: Benny Mazur
If you don't like to eat, please stop accepting invitations to dinner parties. When people cook for you, it's because it gives them pleasure to feed you. Please, eat with gusto. We don't want to see even one strand of pasta left behind.
7
The Cheese Snob
Flickr: Dan
Look, we're just going to come right out and say it: we bought our cheese at Costco. And we want to serve it as an appetizer, not as an after-dinner course.
8
The Vegan
Flickr: torbakhopper
They present all the same challenges as the gluten-free diner, only with a side of judgement. Because, the animals.
9
The 'White Foods Only' Eater
Flickr: 世書 名付
Unless your guest is five years old, or has allergies, they have to eat the foods served to them at a dinner party. We don't care how much they hate lettuce, there will be no Kraft mac and cheese to replace it (no matter how much we secretly love the stuff ourselves).

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