Kids may say the darndest things, but parents tweet about them in the funniest ways. So each week, we round up the most hilarious 140-character quips from moms and dads to spread the joy. Sometimes they come out a little late, like this week's batch below. (We blame the kids.) Scroll down to read them all and follow @HuffPostParents on Twitter for more!
The recorder: instrument of every child's delight and every parent's nightmare.
— Kathy kissingthefrog (@lifewiththefrog) May 1, 2014
"It's just that I'm so cool and fun so the only way you can really rebel is by being boring. I don't envy you." - heart to heart w my son
— Jenny Mollen (@jennyandteets) May 7, 2014
Why is it that when I say " Put away your toys" my children react as if I said "Put the lotion in the f@&$ing basket"?
— Bunmi Laditan (@BunmiLaditan) May 8, 2014