How To Swear In Different Languages

We already know how to order beer in other languages and how to "shush" people in a foreign tongue... but what if you need to be a little less polite on your travels?

A new series of guidebooks will teach travelers to "rant, bitch and swear" in a number of languages, from German to Spanish. True, it's tough to provide a perfect literal translation of swear phrases, and colloquialisms differ from region to region. But travel sites have been quick to point out their favorite sayings even prior to the books' release, and we are jumping on the f*ckin' bandwagon.

FRENCH
De l'air!
It means: "Piss off!"
Say it: when you're chastised for putting bread on a plate.

Un fouille-merde
It means: "shit stirrer"
Say it: to the women who whisper about your lack of designer clothing.

être con comme un balais
It means: "to be dumb as a brush."
Say it: um, never? Like actually... why would you call someone a brush?

GERMAN
Völliger Bockmist
It means: "complete bullshit"
Say it: to the guy who steals your lane in his tiny German Auto.

Es ist zum Kotzen!
It means: "It makes you want to puke!"
Say it: when the bratwurst line is too long to handle.

ITALIAN
Stronzo!
It means: "Son of a bitch!"
Say it: to the crazy Americans who try to hail taxis

Farsela addosso
It means: "shit your pants with fear"
Say it: on the summit of Scala dei Turchi.

SPANISH
Una patada en los cojones
It means: "a real kick in the nuts"
Use it: when you wipe out while windsurfing.

Estar pedo
It means: "to be drunk as a skunk"
Use it: after a night at Cardamomo.

Note: A previous version of this post listed the phrase "être criminal comme un balais." We've swapped the word "criminal" with "con" to make it more in line with how the French typically insult each other.