As every female on the planet within marrying age knows, being a bridesmaid is a lot of work.
So why not turn it into a part-time gig? One 26-year-old woman in New York posted an ad on Craigslist recently looking for work as a "Professional Bridesmaid."
Like any good job-seeker, she begins by listing her past experience:
This year alone, i've been a bridesmaid 4 times. That's 4 different chiffon dresses, 4 different bachelorette parties filled with tequila shots and guys in thong underwear twerking way too close to my face, 4 different pre-wedding pep talks to the bride about how this is the happiest day of her life and marriage, probably, is just like riding a bike: a little shaky at first but then she'll get the hang of it.
Next, she goes on to say when her services are useful:
So let me be there for you, this time if:
- You don't have any other girlfriends except your third cousin, twice removed, who is often found sticking her tongue down an empty bottle of red wine.
- Your fiance has an extra groomsmen and you're looking to even things out so your pictures don't look funny and there's not one single guy walking down the aisle by himself
- You need someone to take control and make sure bridesmaid #4 buys her dress on time and doesn't show up 3 hours late the day of the wedding or paint her nails lime green.
Lastly, she informs the bride-to-be exactly which talents she brings to the table:
- Holding up the 18 layers of your dress so that you can pee with ease on your wedding day
- Catching the bouquet and then following that moment up with my best Miss America-like "Omg, I can't believe this" speech.
- Doing the electric and the cha cha slide.
- Responding in a timely manner to pre-wedding email chains created by other bridesmaids and the Maid of Honor
Check out the ad in its entirety below (and click here for a larger version).
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