The New England Patriots defeated the Pittsburgh Steelers Thursday night in the first NFL game of the new season. After the game, Steelers coach Mike Tomlin seemed furious, saying that he couldn't communicate with his team because Patriots radio was being broadcast into his headset.
The Huffington Post has received the transcript of what went on inside his headset.
MIKE TOMLIN: Alright Steelers, let's start out the season right!
SKEETER: THIS IS SKEETER!
THE CLAM: AND I'M PETER CLAMSKI, aka THE CLAM!
SKEETER: AND YOU'RE LISTENING TO ...
SKEETER/THE CLAM: SKEETER AND THE CLAM!
SKEEETER: PATRIOTS FOOTBALL RADIO HERE ON WPAT.
MIKE TOMLIN: We're getting Pats fan radio again. AHH! Um, OK, let's just try to deal with it.
SKEETER: Well right off the bat, can we talk about Mike Tomlin?
THE CLAM: Guy's a joke! Look at him standing there all pissed and confused!
SKEETER: Well I'd be pissed, too, if I was about to lose to Brady and the Pats on national television. I heard Pittsburgh was going to fire him last season but he got on his hands and knees and begged the upper brass to keep him around. Real sorry stuff for a grown man with a family and kids!
THE CLAM: I believe it!
MIKE TOMLIN: Ahh, Jesus Christ. Shut up! I can't think with these idiots in my ear! CAN WE GET THIS FIXED?!
SKEETER: TOUCHDOWN PATS! HIT IT!
("Shipping Off to Boston" by Dropkick Murphys plays)
(HORN)
(HORN)
(HORN)
SKEETER/THE CLAM: TOUCHDOWN PATS! TOUCHDOWN PATS!
(Dinner bell noise)
(Tug boat noise)
MIKE TOMLIN: OH MY GOD, SHUT UP! SOMEBODY GET ME ANOTHER HEADSET, NOW!
SKEETER: Wow, that sure looked easy, Clam!
THE CLAM: YOU GOT THAT RIGHT, SKEET-MAN! Steelers coach Mike Tomlin must be irate. I mean, I could've stopped that play and I'm legally blind in both eyes!
SKEETER: COULDN'T HAVE SAID IT BETTER MYSELF, CLAM. This must be more embarrassing than that time Mike Tomlin had to repeat the seventh grade. I looked it up!
MIKE TOMLIN: WHERE IS THAT POSTED? ... WHERE IS MY NEW HEADSET?!
SKEETER: Let's take some calls! Caller, you're on with Skeeter and the Clam on WPAT.
CALLER #1: Longtime listener, first-time caller. I just wanted to say that I think Mike Tomlin doesn't know a football from a cat's ass.
SKEETER: OUCH!
THE CLAM: I BELIEVE IT!
SKEETER: Caller, you're on with Skeeter and the Clam!
CALLER #2: Hey, Skeeter and The Clam. Big fan. I'm watching the game and Mike Tomlin seems to be pointing at his headset and shouting at people ...
MIKE TOMLIN: YEAH, BECAUSE YOU LOSERS KEEP SCREAMING IN MY EAR!
CALLER #2: Do you think he's aware that the Steelers are in their own endzone and are about to throw an interception?
MIKE TOMLIN: A WHAT?!
SKEETER: INTERCEPTION!!!
THE CLAM: Good call, caller! Just for that, we're going to send you on an all-expenses paid trip to Pittsburgh!
CALLER #2: But Pittsburgh blows ...
THE CLAM: JUST JOSHING! WE'RE GIVING YOU TWO TICKETS TO THE NEXT PATS HOME GAME!
CALLER #2: OH MY LORD! THANK YOU SO MUCH!
SKEETER: YOU GOT IT, CALLER!
THE CLAM: One more quick thing about Mike Tomlin. Did you know he "likes" people's activity on LinkedIn?
SKEETER: WHOA, WHAT A SNOOZEFEST!
THE CLAM: I KNOW, RIGHT?
MIKE TOMLIN: THAT'S A FINE THING TO DO! WAIT, WAIT, WAIT ... CAN SOMEBODY TELL ME WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE GAME?!
SKEETER/THE CLAM: TOUCHDOWN PATS!
("Shipping Off to Boston" by Dropkick Murphys plays)
(HORN)
(HORN)
(HORN)
(Jim Carrey, "AAAAHHHLLLLLRIGHTY THEN!" clip)
(Various "Jock Jams" plays)
("Scarface," "Say hello to my little friend!" clip)
SKEETER/THE CLAM: TOUCHDOWN PATS! TOUCHDOWN PATS!
(Tug boat noise)
(Chris Farley, "HOLY SHNIKES!" clip)
(Tug boat noise)
(Chris Farley, "HOLY SHNIKES!" clip)
MIKE TOMLIN: THAT'S IT!
(THROWS HEADSET ON THE GROUND)
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