The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant -- but succinct -- wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week's great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.
7yo: you look KIND of old, I guess Me: who asked you? 7yo: ...like you just graduated from college Me: I hope you live with me forever
— Nicole Chung (@nicole_soojung) November 4, 2015
waxing in November when I don't live anywhere near the equator? hahaHahshahshshHahahahdgdhhshaHahahshdhshdhHahahaha, no dear.
— mí (@kcheersbye) November 5, 2015
some day i will end up in urgent care with a dislocated shoulder after trying to zip up the back of my own dress
— Jessica Roy (@JessicaKRoy) November 5, 2015
I suspect that low-carb diets work not because they are healthier, but because without carbs I simply lose the will to eat.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) November 5, 2015
Triscuits: You can't just eat one* *one box
— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) November 3, 2015
high school is just a bunch of people in olive green jackets lying to each other
— mom from mars (@nurserycrimes) November 5, 2015
I want a gentlemen in the streets & a gentlemen in the sheets & a gentlemen in the kitchen & a gentlemen in the laundry room-I want a butler
— J. Ciencin Henriquez (@TheWriterJess) November 4, 2015
There is literally nothing worse than wearing a jumpsuit and having to get completely naked every time you pee.
— NYC BLONDE (@NYC_Blonde) November 5, 2015
Whatever it is, it is behind the fridge and I am afraid of it
— cornucopandrea (@andreagrimes) November 5, 2015
The excessive amount of blue eyeshadow used on #TheOC doesn't hold up in 2015. Seth Cohen does.
— Emma Gray (@emmaladyrose) November 3, 2015
Every once in a great while I pause and look up at the sky and remember that Sarah Palin was considered a viable VP candidate in 2008. 👍🏽
— Sara Benincasa (@SaraJBenincasa) November 5, 2015
missed connection me: girl eating doughnut while watching the marathon you: guy who yelled DOUGHNUT while running past me
— Aude White (@audevwhite) November 2, 2015
"do you ever find yourself being attracted to people because they look comfortable?"
— Hannah Giorgis (@ethiopienne) October 31, 2015
they say absence makes the heart grow fonder and truly that's the only reason i muted you
— maddie (@moscaddie) November 6, 2015
"lol feminists are ugly" aka "I'm reducing this person to their looks bc I don't agree w their views & it's easier than making valid points"
— farwz (@farwzaz) November 5, 2015
her lips were netflix red
— Mae (@mzeld) November 7, 2014
eddie redmayne's cheekbones could slice me like a papercut
— Taylor Trudon (@taylortrudon) November 4, 2015
*peels an inspirational Post-it off the bathroom mirror so I can check my makeup*
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) November 4, 2015
"So who was your favorite Backstreet Boy?" - me trying to make new friends as an adult
— Taylor Pittman (@TaylorPittman22) October 25, 2015
What are you guys doing tonight? I'm gonna scroll through Netflix then HBOGo then Showtime then Hulu then iTunes & end up watching my dog.
— Kendra Alvey (@Kendragarden) November 6, 2015
Also on HuffPost:
Ice Cream That Understands Our PMS
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
It's Another Trump-Biden Showdown — And We Need Your Help
The Future Of Democracy Is At Stake
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
Your Loyalty Means The World To Us
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
The 2024 election is heating up, and women's rights, health care, voting rights, and the very future of democracy are all at stake. Donald Trump will face Joe Biden in the most consequential vote of our time. And HuffPost will be there, covering every twist and turn. America's future hangs in the balance. Would you consider contributing to support our journalism and keep it free for all during this critical season?
HuffPost believes news should be accessible to everyone, regardless of their ability to pay for it. We rely on readers like you to help fund our work. Any contribution you can make — even as little as $2 — goes directly toward supporting the impactful journalism that we will continue to produce this year. Thank you for being part of our story.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
It's official: Donald Trump will face Joe Biden this fall in the presidential election. As we face the most consequential presidential election of our time, HuffPost is committed to bringing you up-to-date, accurate news about the 2024 race. While other outlets have retreated behind paywalls, you can trust our news will stay free.
But we can't do it without your help. Reader funding is one of the key ways we support our newsroom. Would you consider making a donation to help fund our news during this critical time? Your contributions are vital to supporting a free press.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our journalism free and accessible to all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. Would you consider becoming a regular HuffPost contributor?
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. If circumstances have changed since you last contributed, we hope you'll consider contributing to HuffPost once more.
Already contributed? Log in to hide these messages.