The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant -- but succinct -- wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week's great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.
Sometimes I'm like nothing good will ever happen and life is dumb and other times I remember bread bowls exist
— Heben Nigatu (@heavenrants) December 20, 2015
My girl squad is 80% actual dogs.
— Ally Maynard (@missmayn) December 22, 2015
The force is basically like that thing Matilda has int it
— Sugarpug Fairy ✨ (@floskii) December 22, 2015
okay. hear me out. Romantic Comedy where @JohnBoyega helps his big brother @idriselba find a girlfriend. And it's Christmas.
— Rebekah Weatherspoon (@rebekahwsm) December 21, 2015
"if you want a lot of meat and a good time here, you have to get the Benihana trio" my favorite 10 year old
— Aminatou Sow (@aminatou) December 22, 2015
*Clicks post called "Simple Everyday Eye Makeup Look"* *Sees the look requires 9 steps* *Throws laptop across room as if at the patriarchy*
— Chloe Angyal (@ChloeAngyal) December 22, 2015
I am always late to therapy which would probably be a great thing to talk about in therapy.
— Jenny Jaffe (@jennyjaffe) December 21, 2015
we are not celebrating gouda cheese enough
— Tracy Clayton (@brokeymcpoverty) December 22, 2015
I was going to bake Christmas cookies today and then I remembered I would rather watch paint dry so I'm doing that instead.
— Laura Benanti (@LauraBenanti) December 19, 2015
*googles schlonged*
— Elizabeth Plank (@feministabulous) December 22, 2015
Forever 21 should be called Forever Too Old To Be Shopping Here Because Everything Is Too Cheap And Neon And--OOH Look, A Sparkly Dress!
— Taylor Trudon (@taylortrudon) December 21, 2015
2016 look pic.twitter.com/34Y3AaeLQN
— brittany spanos (@ohheybrittany) December 22, 2015
I hope dudes are excited to use the whiskey stones they got last year in the Moscow mule mugs they're getting this year
— Kat Stoeffel (@KStoeffel) December 22, 2015
*swandives into the limpid pools that are Oscar Isaac's eyes* I saw Star Wars again, you guys. Everything was beautiful, and nothing hurt.
— Bim Adewunmi (@bimadew) December 22, 2015
tfw when you're in a stuffy-ass murray hill starbucks and "honey" is blasting from the speakers pic.twitter.com/ZlCfx7vl5A
— Nona WillisAronowitz (@nona) December 23, 2015
this white noise brings all the ghosts to the yard / and they're like "we're haunting you hard" / damn right this app is fucking terrifying
— Chelsea Nachman (@chelseanachman) December 22, 2015
As the saying goes: "It's better to have won Miss Universe and lost than to never have won Miss Universe at all."
— Jamie Feldman (@RealGirlProject) December 21, 2015
Just learned my mom likes to keep the house at erect nipple temp. Related: don't look at me.
— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) December 23, 2015
people my age are getting engaged and i'm over here like pic.twitter.com/GG34lw2JeQ
— Kaylalalala Yandoli (@kaylayandoli) December 20, 2015
If you call me on the phone I don't want to talk to you.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) December 23, 2015
Also on HuffPost:
20 Holiday Cards That Just Get You
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